# Guys getting kicked in the crotch in movies and TV? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [March 13, 2006, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233 "2006-03-13T21:17:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Eleusis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Eleusis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eleusis)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/21 "2006-03-14T13:44:42Z")
> [@Eleusis](#): > > I guess I’ll take the contrary position for the mere sake of it. > > I’ve been kicked in the balls a few times… though not in the last 15 years or so… > > I always faked it. > I’m 34 years old, plenty manly, am married, have a baby due in two months, and have balls the size of lemons. > > Maybe I never got a direct crushing blow but it was never the doubled over gasping for breath thing. > > Go figure. BTW, I’m Iron Balls McGinty. ---
**Author:** ![gigi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a587f6/32.png) [@gigi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gigi)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/22 "2006-03-14T14:09:50Z")
My favorite was in “Something to Talk About” when Kyra Sedgwick quietly and presumably considerately lets the cheating Dennis Quaid into the house and sucker-knees him. It was just so subtle and sophisticated. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/23 "2006-03-14T14:16:41Z")
This happened last night on Supernanny. The screaming, kicking three year old daughter got daddy right where it hurts. Daddy went down for the count, and Jo the Supernanny gave the kid whatfor: You don’t ever kick your father in that place again. ---
**Author:** ![stegon66](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ee59a6/32.png) [@stegon66](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stegon66)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/24 "2006-03-14T14:24:02Z")
One time when I was a kid I was standing on the crossbar to a swing set and slipped… Ouchy. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/25 "2006-03-14T15:32:46Z")
> [@Eleusis](#): > > {I} have a baby due in two months… > [@](#): > > Maybe I never got a direct crushing blow but it was never the doubled over gasping for breath thing. (editing mine) :eek: You \*are \* a manly man. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 5:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/26 "2006-03-14T17:03:48Z")
> [@Cat Fight](#): > > If you guys have any interest in seeing men (and some young 'uns) kicked in the nuts, have I got the [video](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vr4H5b14KQw&search=kicked%20in%20the%20nuts) for you. Soooo…if I kick a guy in the nads, then point off in the distance, that makes it all right? I don’t think so. ---
**Author:** ![PoorYorick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ecccb3/32.png) [@PoorYorick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PoorYorick)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/27 "2006-03-14T17:53:28Z")
> [@stegon66](#): > > One time when I was a kid I was standing on the crossbar to a swing set and slipped… > > Ouchy. I maintain that playground seesaws are the scourge of male childhood. ---
**Author:** ![Enderw24](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ba9def/32.png) [@Enderw24](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enderw24)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/28 "2006-03-14T17:58:22Z")
> [@Clothahump](#): > > Soooo…if I kick a guy in the nads, then point off in the distance, that makes it all right? I don’t think so. Everyone in the video was laughing. Why don’t you have a sense of humor? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/29 "2006-03-14T18:53:19Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > Everyone in the video was laughing. Why don’t you have a sense of humor? Yes, I’m quite sure it’s all set up, what with the kids and the legal problems. Plus, you must wear a bright red clown wig for it to be all right. Or have Bob Saget narrate. ---
**Author:** ![bubastis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d07c76/32.png) [@bubastis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bubastis)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/30 "2006-03-14T18:59:00Z")
[QUOTE=Malacandra] You were trying to rape or murder her? :eek:[/QUOTE You know women, yap, yap, yap… well, I found the “Off” button. ---
**Author:** ![Gozu\_Tashoya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7993a0/32.png) [@Gozu\_Tashoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gozu_Tashoya)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/31 "2006-03-14T20:10:19Z")
> [@Enderw24](#): > > Everyone in the video was laughing. Why don’t you have a sense of humor? Maybe it’s just me, but that video gets funnier if the kickee pulls out a baseball bat then beats clown-wig guy’s head in. But then, I don’t really like clowns. What? ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/32 "2006-03-14T21:17:55Z")
From Chris Bliss’s Web site, his essay on standup comedy techniques: > [@](#): > > Technique #5 - The Dick Joke > > Okay, so this isn’t exactly a secret either. Even though there are no known cave drawings to back me up on this, intuition suggests that the dick joke is at least the second oldest form of comedy. The first big laugh probably came after some sort of accidental Cro-magnon pratfall. The next day, Grok took a rock to the nuts, and 50,000 years later it’s still funny (witness the global success of America’s Funniest Home Videos). Worst incident I ever saw was at a Major League Baseball game. I think it was in 1993 or '94, but I can’t remember for sure. A coworker had a pair of box seat tickets to see the Seattle Mariners play the Kansas City Royals in the Kingdome. Our seats were directly behind home plate, a mere three rows back, so the view was great. The Mariners were batting. I don’t remember who was pitching for KC, but he fired his pitch, and the catcher somehow missed it … and the ball took the umpire right in the crotch. There was instant silence in the Kingdome, and then you could hear this collective sympathy groan from the 20,000 fans in the seats. The umpire did this slow crumple to the ground and curled up into a fetal position, while everybody gathered around him and the trainers came running out to attend to him. The game was put on hold for about 20 minutes. You might call it a “pain delay” 😃 To his credit, the ump eventually got up and the game resumed with him behind the plate. All I could think was that it could have been much, much worse. The Royals could have been batting, and Randy Johnson was pitching for the Mariners that day. ---
**Author:** ![Gary\_Robson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gary_robson/32/3448_2.png) [@Gary\_Robson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gary_Robson)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2006, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/33 "2006-03-14T23:15:08Z")
> [@Cat Fight](#): > > Worse still is when a woman’s ‘padding’ tears off in little bits and goes through her like shards of glass in a helium balloon. Ouch. :eek: I’m probably reading that too literally, so I’m not sure what you’re describing, but it doesn’t sound like much fun. Once it’s happened to you, it’s not funny anymore. I took a racketball to the crotch once. Yep. There’s a _reason_ they tell you to never turn around. Curled me up like a dead tarantula. Rushing sound in the ears. Spots before the eyes. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2006, 1:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/34 "2006-03-15T01:24:18Z")
> [@ayalabmaj](#): > > Yeah, that must be like how I think it’s funny when I see a woman getting beat. Exactly! Sometimes the bitch is asking for it, you know? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2006, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/35 "2006-03-15T01:50:24Z")
> [@ayalabmaj](#): > > Yeah, that must be like how I think it’s funny when I see a woman getting beat. She was describing an accident. You are describing a deliberate act. I just hope you’re not the guy at the police station sending abusive husbands back home. (For the record, I was describing cramps, minus the backaches, nausea, upset stomach, etc.) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2006, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/36 "2006-03-15T02:36:09Z")
> [@Superdude](#): > > But the football…his crotch…! > > It works on so many levels! From \*\*The Longest Yard \*\* (the original, anyway, with Burt Reynolds)? In any event, there was definitely a football thrown deliberately into one of the prison guard’s crotch. Whoever took that pass for the close-up shot can be proud… _that_’s stunt work! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2006, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/37 "2006-03-15T02:50:44Z")
> [@The Scrivener](#): > > From \*\*The Longest Yard \*\* (the original, anyway, with Burt Reynolds)? Nope, that old classic _Hans Moleman Productions Presents: Man Getting Hit by Football._ _The Longest Yard_ may have had heart, but _Football in the Groin_ had a football in the groin. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2006, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/38 "2006-03-15T03:57:31Z")
> [@mobo85](#): > > Nope, that old classic _Hans Moleman Productions Presents: Man Getting Hit by Football._ _The Longest Yard_ may have had heart, but _Football in the Groin_ had a football in the groin. I was particular fond of George C. Scott’s starring role in the remake of this movie. GCS: “Aargh! My _groin_!” ---
**Author:** ![Zoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/a4c791/32.png) [@Zoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zoe)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2006, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/39 "2006-03-15T04:53:17Z")
> [@](#): > > When did this start? What movie really “kicked it off” and got the ball rolling for this particular physical comedy stunt? > [@](#): > > **Biffy** : IMHO the all-time classic cinematic swiftie to the nuts is Paul Newman vs. Ted Cassidy in Butch Cassidy & the Sundance Kid. > [@](#): > > **Lute** : How about Clit Eastwood giving Richard Kiel the business end of a sledgehammer? I don’t remember seeing one on film before Butch and Sundance in 1969 and that one was done with comedic effect. ( **1-2-3 GO!** ) I seem to recall that sledgehammer from my 42nd birthday. That’s what happens when you let your fiance and your sixteen year old future stepson pick our your birthday movies – _Palerider_ and _Thunderdome_ in 1985, I think. But your typo was not to be missed anyway. ---
**Author:** ![chorpler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chorpler/32/2888_2.png) [@chorpler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chorpler)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2006, 5:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233/40 "2006-03-15T05:13:04Z")
> [@vaderspal](#): > > I’d be curious to know whether you’ve heard this from an actual female, or if you’re just guessing. My wife’s gynecologist was giving her a pelvic exam, and he got to the part where he palpated her ovaries, and I could tell it was pretty uncomfortable because she was trying to crush my hand into powder. All of a sudden I see the doctor’s arm jerk a bit, and KABLAM, this white-hot pain shoots through my hand as my wife gasps and her gripping strength goes up by several orders of magnitude for a second. The doctor looked at her and said “Yeah, I know, this can be pretty unpleasant. Now you know what it feels like when your husband gets hit in the testicles. The ovaries are just as sensitive, you just don’t usually notice because they’re better protected.” For some reason, I really don’t like that guy… [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-getting-kicked-in-the-crotch-in-movies-and-tv/348233.md?page=3)