# Guys hollering at women, where did they learn this? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 4, 2003, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444 "2003-09-04T02:11:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Iteki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/eada6e/32.png) [@Iteki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Iteki)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 12:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/21 "2003-09-04T12:55:52Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by sailor \* > \*\*Planet Jerry Springer. where some women can be just as low class as some men. Sorry if I do not share your politically correct planet where _all_ the women are ladies in spite of many of the men being rude assholes. \*\* Where did you get the “all” from **sailor**? I answered for myself. More than half the times I have ignored shouted comments of this type, the comments have turned aggressive. I have in these cases heard all the comments that **Eats\_Crayons** has gotten, and will raise her with a beer can thrown off a damned roof at me with “What, can’t take a fucking compliment bitch?”. My female friends feel the same, to about 95%, with the other 5% made up of a group of women who do indeed appreciate the attention, and are pleased by the comments. Noone is saying that “all” women react to these experiences in the same way but you. ---
**Author:** ![eeclem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/49beb7/32.png) [@eeclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eeclem)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/22 "2003-09-04T13:24:26Z")
wow, i was really going to start a thread about this a few weeks ago when i didn’t walk two blocks without recieving such “compliments”. and the loooooong stares with a little smirk are just as disgusting. leave me alone, let me walk down the street without feeling your slimy eyes on me or forcing me to acknowledge your creepy little existence. i don’t take it as a compliment, in fact it makes me feel gross. it makes me think that if this is the type of attention i’m getting, maybe i made a bad choice when i was getting dressed this morning. sorry, one of my biggest pet peeves. sometimes i really wish there were “common courtesy” police. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/23 "2003-09-04T13:28:37Z")
People do this to women, too? :eek: Seriously, the fact that this happens to me, as a guy, (except less extreme,) either means that there are far more homosexual hunters out there than previously thought, or it’s a territorial display. And my thinking, when this happens: MSmith wrote: > [@](#): > > As for the boyfriend. What’s he going to do? Kick three guys asses? No, but if he’s bigger than they he could put a hurtin’ on one of them. It’s not like everyone is rational when threatened even when faced with overwhelming odds. > [@](#): > > No one ever got laid by winning the “silent game”. The less said about this, the better. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/24 "2003-09-04T14:30:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Iteki \* > \*\* I have in these cases heard all the comments that **Eats\_Crayons** has gotten, and will raise her with a beer can thrown off a damned roof at me with “What, can’t take a fucking compliment bitch?”. \*\* Wow. I’ve never had anything thrown at me. Impressive. Dumb, related anecdote: The best I’ve ever seen anyone cope was my best friend in highschool. Highschool was the mid- to late-80s for me. My best friend could do a painfully funny impression of “Sloth” from the moive _Goonies_. (Sloth was the disfigured, giant, simpleton with the heart of gold. “Sloth love Chunk!”) We were both “thespians.” Read: “over-caffeinated theatre brats with no shame.” On the way to a rehearsal, a car full of guys hooted something at us. My friend started bouncing up and down, clapping, pointing at them and in her best Sloth voice of unbridled glee and extreme volume: _ **squeeeeeeeal!** _ “He wants to be my boyfriend! I have a boyfriend! I have a boyfriend!” _squeeeeeeeal!_ We heard “shit!” and the car took off, tires squealing, and half the guys howling at their buddy. I wish wish I could get away with that now. (But then, I couldn’t so Sloth like my best friend.) ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/25 "2003-09-04T14:30:27Z")
Actually, the “hollering _yo baby_ at women” thing is just the tip of the iceberg. Something like 94.7% of all the courting/mating behavior of my gender embarrasses the fuck out of me and brings to mind undersexed babboons hurling feces and whatnot. I’d say it ruins things for the rest of us but I’m not sure a consensus exists among the remaining 5.3%…but I have to say my instinctive first priority when trying to flirt/mate/etc is to distance myself from all those stupid het male trodlogytes. ---
**Author:** ![sailor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a587f6/32.png) [@sailor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sailor)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 2:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/26 "2003-09-04T14:38:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Iteki \* > Noone is saying that “all” women react to these experiences in the same way but you. Please point out to me where I said that. > [@](#): > > Originally posted by sailor: > **Some** women smile because they like the idea of being desirable and because they are as low class as the guys doing the cat calls. > [@](#): > > Originally posted by sailor: > Planet Jerry Springer. where **some** women can be just as low class as some men. It seems to me **some** people here have some comprehension problem and their knees jerk unnecessarily. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/27 "2003-09-04T14:55:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by sailor \* > \*\*Please point out to me where I said that. It seems to me **some** people here have some comprehension problem and their knees jerk unnecessarily. \*\* **Sailor** , I think your “some” was seriously deflated when it was prefaced with > [@](#): > > That is ludicrous. Women smile so they will not get more insults? Gimme a break! which implies that “some” is a whole lot more than a small percentage. The above tends to imply that your “some” is a bit closer to “most.” That may not have been your intention, I agree that there are some women who really do think “damn, I must be a hottie” and take the harassment as a true compliment. But I think the majority are doing the “thanks, now fuck off” smile to deflect even more aggressive displays of “I am Mog, hear me roar!” ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/28 "2003-09-04T15:21:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by msmith537 \* > \*\*Why do some women smile and like it? Everyone likes to be complemented…even if it’s by a jackass. > \ > No one ever got laid by winning the “silent game”. \*\* Actually, IMHO the “strong silent type” over in the corner is always far, _far_ more appealing and boink-worthy than the braying ass. The mystique of a man who says little is sexy. “Hee-haw! Hee-haw!” is not. ---
**Author:** ![lezlers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@lezlers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lezlers)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/29 "2003-09-04T16:06:10Z")
I totally agree with **Eats\_Crayons** on the gut instinct thing. A lot (actually, more like the majority) of guys that catcall and such give off a creepy vibe. When the vibe is creepy it’s best to just ignore them, don’t make eye contact, pretend you’re deaf or whatever. If they keep persisting, then it’s best to quickly aknowledge them (the terse smile as she suggested). I’d also like to add that when I do give a smile, it’s usually a very quick one, followed by my looking away and the times I do it are few and far between. And obviously, only when they appear harmless. Of course, because I dare aknowledge them, even on rare occasion, I must be destined for a seat on Springer, according to **sailor** :rolleyes: Curious **sailor** , are you male or female? ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/30 "2003-09-04T16:41:05Z")
And how about the baboon-brains who bellow “Hey, SMILE, Honey? Whatssamatta with you, huh?” I’m tempted to fling back, with a quivering lip, “My mother died this morning.” But I doubt the pinheads would learn anything from it. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/31 "2003-09-04T17:11:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by EddyTeddyFreddy \* > \*\*And how about the baboon-brains who bellow “Hey, SMILE, Honey? Whatssamatta with you, huh?” I’m tempted to fling back, with a quivering lip, “My mother died this morning.” But I doubt the pinheads would learn anything from it. \*\* Oh, but _that’s_ when you “smile”. Read: “Bare your teeth like Lou Ferigno as the Hulk while going ‘RRRRRRR!’” ---
**Author:** ![Scuba\_Ben](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@Scuba\_Ben](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scuba_Ben)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/32 "2003-09-04T17:45:19Z")
Brava, **Crayon’s friend** , brava! :: clap :: clap :: That’s a wonderful way to deal with that catcalling jerk. Give 'em the attention he wants, and watch him flee! Many years ago, I saw a series of theater sketches, including one vignette where a lady followed up on a construction worker’s catcalls. She turned the tables on him, started calling things back, freaked him out, and sent him running. (ISTR the sketch was called _A, My Name is Alice_. This was a college production, so the players might have written it themselves.) So this particular technique only works if the initial target REALLY overplays their role. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/33 "2003-09-04T18:21:11Z")
Yes, “crazy” is very effective at turnign the tables that way. Try this experiment: next time a bunch of doofuses (“doofii”?) driving past yell “Hey, baby!”, scream and start beating yourself on the head like Rainman. But that’s my inner “thespian” talking. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/34 "2003-09-04T18:31:19Z")
I must say, this thread is reviving unpleasant old memories of my youth in the city. One of the nice things about becoming middle-aged, gray and frumpy is that you’re no longer a target for this crap. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/35 "2003-09-04T18:39:30Z")
I get this crap at gas stations. I usually just pretend as if I don’t hear anything, but sometimes it’s so loud you can’t help but have a reaction. I’ve actually considered getting a stun gun or some mace to carry with me for these situations. In one week: A. Two guys circled me while I was getting coffee and made various comments on my body. B. A guy came up two feet behind me while I was pumping gas so he could, “check out my tattoo.” I want to be ready the instant one of these mouthbreathers comes too close. Their comments and aggression make me feel threatened, not flattered. And invading my personal space makes me want to strike back. Now, on the other hand, I’ve had men simply tell me I look nice or politely ask for a date. Those I can handle with a simple, “No thanks.” The others are about to get a rude awakening. ---
**Author:** ![Gulo\_gulo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bcef8e/32.png) [@Gulo\_gulo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gulo_gulo)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/36 "2003-09-04T18:48:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Eats\_Crayons \* > \*\*Actually, IMHO the “strong silent type” over in the corner is always far, _far_ more appealing and boink-worthy than the braying ass. > > The mystique of a man who says little is sexy. > > \*\* Oh yes, I agree! I’ve always been drawn to the quiet ones. Mrowl! _ahem_ Back to the subject at hand! I’ve always ignored the guys screaming and making comments, they are not worth my time and energy to make a response. (I truly hate the ones who tell me to “Smile! You’re prettier that way!” Ugh.) I had a friend who would stop and approach them and start asking them things like: “Why are you making those noises? Do you really think women find that attractive? Have you ever met a girlfriend this way? Are you just showing off for your friends or affirming your heterosexuality?” etc. She wouldn’t even give them time to respond and they always just slunk away (usually calling her names, heh) or drove off. I don’t understand why they do it, but then I can’t just blame the guys. I’ve seen women act the same way. I fail to see the allure. ---
**Author:** ![Jodi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/7feea3/32.png) [@Jodi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jodi)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/37 "2003-09-04T18:53:45Z")
Just driving by to affirm that, yes, if you ignore the catcalls chances are IME better than 50-50 that you’ll then be called “bitch!” or worse. I never ever respond to this crap, mostly because I won’t give them the satisfaction. But if guys think most women think this is complimentary or fun, they (those guys) are dreaming. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/38 "2003-09-04T19:27:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Indygrrl \* > \*\*I get this crap at gas stations. I usually just pretend as if I don’t hear anything, but sometimes it’s so loud you can’t help but have a reaction. I’ve actually considered getting a stun gun \*\* _blink, blink_ Pumping gas + big spark from stun gun = :eek: Little bit o’ Indy over here… Little bit o’ Indy over there… Here some Indy… there some Indy… Everywhere some bits of Indy! 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/39 "2003-09-04T20:15:22Z")
What if the guys were giving catcalls that were non-threatening/shallow? Like, “You have a wonderful mind!” or “Let’s be friends!” heh, I wonder what the reaction would be to stuff like that 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2003, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444/40 "2003-09-04T20:21:07Z")
What if the guys were giving catcalls that were non-threatening/shallow? Like, “You have a wonderful mind!” or “Let’s be friends!” heh, I wonder what the reaction would be to stuff like that 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-hollering-at-women-where-did-they-learn-this/199444.md?page=3)