# Guys: how old a woman is too old ? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 11, 2011, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385 "2011-08-11T22:31:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Zeriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/58956e/32.png) [@Zeriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeriel)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/41 "2011-08-13T03:12:13Z")
Hell, I’m 32, and _I_ would do Helen Mirren in a heartbeat. OP, where are you at? I’m trying to decide if I should throw a “how YOU doin’” in here or not. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![kiz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/7feea3/32.png) [@kiz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kiz)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 7:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/42 "2011-08-13T07:44:30Z")
> [@kunilou](#): > > If a man your age automatically passes you over for someone 10+ years younger, he’s not looking for a companion, he’s looking for a mirror he can look into and see a younger him look back. I’ve heard variations of this theory over the years :nodding: I’m of “a certain age”. If I wasn’t married, I’d be in the same boat as the OP. And come to think of it, I know very few heterosexual men my age who either aren’t already married or have some “issue” which makes women run away screaming for the hills. ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 9:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/43 "2011-08-13T09:12:50Z")
depends on how old I am partly, but also, personal grooming, presentation, and personality are the three general areas I look at in a woman. I’ve seen some women that I thought would be fun to date, that were significantly older. ---
**Author:** ![Romeo\_and\_Whatsherface](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@Romeo\_and\_Whatsherface](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Romeo_and_Whatsherface)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/44 "2011-08-13T15:41:34Z")
> [@Zeriel](#): > > Hell, I’m 32, and _I_ would do Helen Mirren in a heartbeat. > > OP, where are you at? I’m trying to decide if I should throw a “how YOU doin’” in here or not. 😉 Wyoming, where, as they say, “Men are men and sheep are nervous.” Hey, THAT’S the problem! Competition from SHEEP! :smack: WAM and all others, thank you. My family still lives in Chicago, and sometimes I need some sensible feedback to keep my perspective.I’d move back there, but teaching jobs in Illinois are pretty much nonexistent. However, except for missing my family (except my daughter who attends a nearby college) and a dating life, I’m not unhappy. The scenery is gorgeous, the crime rate is ridiculously low, and a traffic jam is five cars at a stoplight. I count my blessings, just wish a single male was one of them. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 3:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/45 "2011-08-13T15:56:13Z")
This thread is 43 posts long it about time somebody threw in the required comment. Since no one else will I will. Pictures, this thread is meaningless without pictures. Somebody had to say it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/46 "2011-08-13T16:38:37Z")
I’m 45. I usually date women between 40 and 49. As far as age goes in a partner, attraction is inversely proportional to how much older she _looks_ than me, not necessarily her calendar age. I look younger than my age, and often I’ll meet women my age that look several years older than me. Then again, not too long ago, I met a woman that was 52, and was quite attracted to her. It didn’t look like there was a significant age difference between us, though. I live in a town where the major demographic group is Cruncho-Americans; it’s a very well-known hippie haven. A lot of women don’t dye their hair, so it’s not uncommon to see someone in their mid-30s to mid-40s with frizzy, natural gray hair. Even if their face is free of wrinkles, the gray hair has a huge aging effect on how they appear. A crunchy woman in her mid-40s or early 50s will look 10 years older than her calendar age in my eyes, because of her “natural” frizzy gray hair. The other hairstyle that will age a woman is [very short, bulbous “mom hair”](http://www.parentdish.com/2006/07/26/do-you-have-mom-hair/). ---
**Author:** ![BrotherCadfael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@BrotherCadfael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrotherCadfael)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/47 "2011-08-13T17:08:03Z")
> [@Rysdad](#): > > “They don’t yell, they don’t tell, and they’re grateful as Hell.” "They don’t yell, they don’t tell, **they don’t swell** , and they’re grateful as Hell. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/48 "2011-08-13T17:12:26Z")
“It’s not the years, it’s the mileage.” I can see myself being a lot more attracted to a 50-year-old who hasn’t abused her body than a 30-year-old who spent a lot of time in the sun, partied too much, had “work” done, etc. There’s a current underwear commercial with a model who is probably in her 30s and looks like Margot Kidder might have looked if she hadn’t discovered recreational drugs. I told my girlfriend when it was on, “If that _was_ Margot Kidder, even however old she is, she’d be hot. But this chick just looks haggard.” ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/49 "2011-08-13T18:05:08Z")
You live in a very remote town in Wyoming. That makes for a very small pool. Most middle-aged men are already in relationships. That shrinks your very small pool down to a puddle. It’s not you. It’s not men. It’s the size of the puddle. Cat Stevens / Yusuf Islam: “If I could meet 'em I could get 'em But as yet I haven’t met 'em That’s how I’m in the state I’m in” ---
**Author:** ![Ambivalid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a5b964/32.png) [@Ambivalid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ambivalid)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/50 "2011-08-13T18:14:39Z")
1. ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/51 "2011-08-13T18:20:27Z")
For myself, a fifty year old, I am attracted to kind, well balanced, well educated, articulate and experienced women who have both self-assurance and a sense of fun and adventure. Age has little to do with it other than that some of these attributes develop over a rich and full life, so I usually find women of my own age or older more attractive than women younger than me. ---
**Author:** ![Slithy\_Tove](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slithy_tove/32/18248_2.png) [@Slithy\_Tove](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slithy_Tove)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/52 "2011-08-13T18:28:47Z")
I don’t think it’s a men vs women thing. We get set in our ways, have seen more red flags than dreams come true, don’t have the sex drive to make it worth the effort and risk. After age 50, relationship prospects are like abducted children: the longer they stay missing the more likely they’re dead. ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/53 "2011-08-13T20:52:10Z")
**elmwood** , what is ‘short, bulbous mom hair’? The one picture in the article wasn’t very illustrative. (I don’t think I have it. My hair is wildly curly and always has been.) ---
**Author:** ![Steken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Steken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steken)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/54 "2011-08-13T21:25:02Z")
Well, while I often find older women attractive, I usually find younger women even _more_ attractive, and so always end up dating the latter category. Not a principle or anything, but that’s the way it always seems to work out. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [August 13, 2011, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/55 "2011-08-13T21:35:48Z")
> [@NinetyWt](#): > > **elmwood** , what is ‘short, bulbous mom hair’? The one picture in the article wasn’t very illustrative. (I don’t think I have it. My hair is wildly curly and always has been.) A “bulb” or upside-down pear like shape, where most of the hair is piled above the ears. It’s a hairstyle I see a lot on women in their 50s and early 60s, and many mom-types in their 40s. It’s the transitional, post-menopausal hair style hair between longer hair and old-lady poodle curls. ---
**Author:** ![Vita\_Beata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/a9a28c/32.png) [@Vita\_Beata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vita_Beata)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2011, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/56 "2011-08-14T15:06:25Z")
> [@Romeo\_and\_Whatsherface](#): > > Wyoming, where, as they say, “Men are men and sheep are nervous.” Hey, THAT’S the problem! Competition from SHEEP! :smack: Laughing! That’s ba-a-a-a-ad. ---
**Author:** ![nashiitashii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7c8e57/32.png) [@nashiitashii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nashiitashii)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/57 "2011-08-14T17:27:25Z")
> [@NinetyWt](#): > > **elmwood** , what is ‘short, bulbous mom hair’? The one picture in the article wasn’t very illustrative. (I don’t think I have it. My hair is wildly curly and always has been.) [This would also be a sample of “mom hair”](http://www.stylelist.com/2010/05/17/mom-hair/)– it’s short, it’s “low maintenance”, and it’s generally unflattering on many women. Shorter cuts than that also tend to count as “mom hair” until they are closer to pixie length than a messy “I did it myself” shag. ---
**Author:** ![peter1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a587f6/32.png) [@peter1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peter1)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2011, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/58 "2011-08-15T15:47:16Z")
Look Romeo, nothing stays the same,especially people. Please don’t be hurt by my blunt response but your question,“at what approximate age, if any, do women stop being secret-ogle worthy?” is ridiculous. You can ask about the temperature at which water boils but human attraction? I can’t think of anything more varied, more complex, more vague, more illusive than that. You might as well have asked for an in-depth explanationof how the human brain works in a few simple words. You say you are trying to put things into perspective but your perspective is so narrow that it’s no wonder you’re confused. You’ve described your situation as being 54 and divorced, staying active, working out, and being in good shape. You don’t know if you’re attractive or not, but you take care of your appearance. That should do it, you think. THAT SHOULD DO IT? Well yeah, if all you’re interested in is keeping your body parts looking cute so people want to have sex with you, then that should do it. Keep doing what you’re doing and you’ll always find men who’ll want to do you.( In fact, that’s true even if you stop doing what you’re doing, that’s just the nature of men.) But when you ask if men in general are actually attracted to women your age, that’s a more complicated question. Look, men can’t speak for other men but at the risk of contradicting myself I will tell you that plenty of men are attracted to women your age and older. The real question is what are they attracted to and for what? I’m not saying that some younger women are not physically attractive (notice that I said some because some are not. Conversely some older womwn are very attractive and some are not) of course they’re nice to look at. But that’s eye candy and after awhile everything wears thin. Look Romeo (God I hate calling you that) I’m older than you and I absolutely do not try to get into the pants of younger women. I much prefer to persue older women with their experience, maturity, intelligence, and more seasoned way of dealing with men. I always say that you are only limited by your imagination and I find the boundries with older women are limitless. What a turn-on. At the end of your comment you say you know that there’e a lot more that goes into the mix but do you? You almost seem to dismiss it in order to come back to your point about older versus younger. But you said one sentence that reveals your naivete: “given a chioce and ALL THINGS BEING EQUAL…” That’s the point–all things are not equal. That older women is far superior to that younger woman. If she’s intelligent, has a personality, a good sense of humor, is imaginative and not affraid to be a little daring, then she’ll seduce me and other men every time. If she’s also pleasant to look at, that’s a plus. But it’s amazing how attractive she becomes and continues to be if all that head stuff is there. Everything just falls into place. Do you get it? You may think I’m off base with this one but I think even your chioce of a moniker: Romeo and Whatsherface is an indication of how you think of yourself–not even there! And if you don’t have a stronge sense of “self”, then all of your “Romeos” will only be looking at body parts. Think about it. I’ll bet you’ve got a lot more going than that. Or maybe we should talk about fear… ---
**Author:** ![NinetyWt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/cc9497/32.png) [@NinetyWt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinetyWt)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2011, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/59 "2011-08-15T16:25:05Z")
Thanks **elmwood** and **nashiitashii**. **Peter** is right. My Daddy is 81 and he says “_no_ woman is too old.” 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 15, 2011, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385/60 "2011-08-15T16:31:14Z")
Let X = concern for causing an unwanted pregnancy Let Y = concern for causing a broken hip When Y approaches the lifetime maximum level of X, she’s too old. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-how-old-a-woman-is-too-old/592385.md?page=4)