# Guys, I'd like to apologize on behalf of the entire state of Texas. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 19, 2013, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928 "2013-07-19T12:19:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2013, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/21 "2013-07-19T18:55:55Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > I haven’t heard the Perry ad, and as loath as I am to defend Perry, when did it become wrong to advertise your state, out-of-state? That’s kind of the point. > > Good for him, fighting for his own state. > > Now I have to run off to the hospital and get this choking treated. Have you listened to the ads? They are not just “Texas is a great place” like ads from other states. They are more “your state sucks.” And the Lewis Black piece was the best Lewis Black piece ever. If I hear Perry is coming back to California (where we support abortion rights, teaching evolution) I’m going to suggest we ride him out of town on a rail. Preferably tarred and feathered. ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2013, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/22 "2013-07-19T20:20:58Z")
You couldn’t possibly apologize _enough_ for Texas to make it worthwhile to accept. Sorry, but good effort nonetheless. ---
**Author:** ![panaccione](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@panaccione](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panaccione)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2013, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/23 "2013-07-19T20:40:12Z")
[Here, Shakes.](https://petitions.whitehouse.gov/petition/peacefully-grant-state-texas-withdraw-united-states-america-and-create-its-own-new-government/BmdWCP8B) I think it would be best for all of us. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2013, 8:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/24 "2013-07-19T20:46:48Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > If I hear Perry is coming back to California (where we support abortion rights, teaching evolution) I’m going to suggest we ride him out of town on a rail. Preferably tarred and feathered. If y’all could just do us that little favor of tarring and feathering, we’d greatly appreciate it. I’ll contribute some chicken fried steak to anyone who participates in this noble act. ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2013, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/25 "2013-07-19T22:05:13Z")
> [@Voyager](#): > > Have you listened to the ads? They are not just “Texas is a great place” like ads from other states. They are more “your state sucks.” > > And the Lewis Black piece was the best Lewis Black piece ever. > If I hear Perry is coming back to California (where we support abortion rights, teaching evolution) I’m going to suggest we ride him out of town on a rail. Preferably tarred and feathered. What part of “I haven’t heard the ad” did you not… ? Listened to it now. NY bans big gulps. Makes self look really stupid. Perry makes joke. Come to Texas where we don’t have any stifling business regs and you can blow up your employees whenever you want. Well, not exactly. Still not seeing it, and Lewis Black is mildly amusing at best, for a second here or there, and mostly just a loud obnoxious NY asshole whose shtick is brainlessly ranting and spitting at the camera. Andy Roony he ain’t. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2013, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/26 "2013-07-19T23:06:39Z")
> [@levdrakon](#): > > What part of “I haven’t heard the ad” did you not… ? > > Listened to it now. NY bans big gulps. Makes self look really stupid. Perry makes joke. Come to Texas where we don’t have any stifling business regs and you can blow up your employees whenever you want. Well, not exactly. > > Still not seeing it, and Lewis Black is mildly amusing at best, for a second here or there, and mostly just a loud obnoxious NY asshole whose shtick is brainlessly ranting and spitting at the camera. Andy Roony he ain’t. > > 🙂 Assuming Perry is anything but a putz is dangerous. I have to admit that Black has been going downhill (on TDS at least) for a while now - but this one redeemed him. And I’m sure you can find a batch of New Yorkers to give it to Bloomberg about the soda. Anyhow, that’s what happens when you elect Republicans. ---
**Author:** ![rowrrbazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rowrrbazzle/32/414_2.png) [@rowrrbazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rowrrbazzle)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2013, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/27 "2013-07-20T06:39:43Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Up until now, I _thought_ we were keeping him contained. That is, until I saw [THIS](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/18/lewis-black-rick-perry-dont-fck-with-new-york_n_3618048.html) (Not completely work safe video). Apparently, he’s trying to raid other states of their jobs. :smack: And he’s doing this, quite comically, with radio ads! > > So yeah, take a look at Lewis Blacks segment on the Daily Show and know that some of us Texans would like to apologize for the giant jack-ass that is Rick Perry. 😃 These kinds of ads were running in California in February. How much attention do you pay to what your state is doing? Perhaps you should not be apologizing for others in your state. And they say people who watch the Daily Show are better informed. And why are radio ads comical? Because you can get a lot more listeners for less cost? (And if imaginatively done, as opposed to Perry’s straight-from-the-shoulder approach, even more effective. [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppZ57EeX6vE](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppZ57EeX6vE) ) > [@levdrakon](#): > > I haven’t heard the Perry ad, and as loath as I am to defend Perry, when did it become wrong to advertise your state, out-of-state? That’s kind of the point. > > Good for him, fighting for his own state. > > Now I have to run off to the hospital and get this choking treated. I know from personal experience that facts can be hard to swallow. But I’m better off in the long run. > [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > In my life, the people from Texas that I’ve interacted with have been smart, thoughtful, and to a one have all had good hearts. Are you saying nobody you know voted for Perry? > [@](#): > > But if 30-second ads are fair game, why not this one? > > [30-second Hijack Ad] > > People, I think Texas can do better. > > Texas needs a governor who is well experienced in corruption and double-dealing. One who can get to work from day one hiring construction companies to do road work on projects that never ever complete and calls it progress. > One who can get tough on all the competing corruption… while still protecting his donors and his crew’s top earners. When pushed, he can even almost sound like Tony Soprano! > > This is why we here in NJ would like to offer you absolutely free\* Governor Chris Christie. > > - reasonable shipping and handling charges may apply. Recall election may be required by law. Free as long as you keep him; sizable penalties may accrue if you ever try to send him back. Offer does not include food. > > Order now and receive at no additional charge “How to Mount an Ad Campaign on the Back of a Disaster” and “How to Disappear in a Herd of Cattle”. > > They say everything is bigger in Texas; you deserve a governor who proves it. > Carrying Governor Christie has made us “Jersey Strong”. Isn’t it somebody else’s turn yet? > > **operators are standing by** > > [/30-second Hijack Ad] Go for it. It’s a free country. > [@Voyager](#): > > Have you listened to the ads? They are not just “Texas is a great place” like ads from other states. They are more “your state sucks.” No, they’re “Texas is better for business”. > [@](#): > > And the Lewis Black piece was the best Lewis Black piece ever. This is Black’s BEST? Seriously? I can see I haven’t been missing anything. Or was it supposed to be satire? If so, it’s brilliant! > [@](#): > > If I hear Perry is coming back to California (where we support abortion rights, teaching evolution) I’m going to suggest we ride him out of town on a rail. Preferably tarred and feathered. If you don’t improve your state’s finances, you won’t have any money for rails, tar, feathers, teachers, or abortions. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2013, 10:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/28 "2013-07-20T10:59:07Z")
> [@rowrrbazzle](#): > > These kinds of ads were running in California in February. How much attention do you pay to what your state is doing? Perhaps you should not be apologizing for others in your state. And they say people who watch the Daily Show are better informed. And perhaps you need to pull that big fucking stick out of your ass. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2013, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/29 "2013-07-20T11:11:05Z")
> [@aldiboronti](#): > > If you’re apologizing for the whole state of Texas who’s voting Perry in? Dead people. It’s a Texas tradition. \*We’re not all like the ones getting all the press. Honest. Many of us are civilized, literate, and don’t own any guns. \* ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2013, 2:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/30 "2013-07-20T14:27:54Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > And perhaps you need to pull that big fucking stick out of your ass. Its a free country; he can go past the pine tar if he wants. I object only when other people have to use it for batting practice after. ---
**Author:** ![septimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/septimus/32/410_2.png) [@septimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/septimus)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2013, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/31 "2013-07-30T16:38:17Z")
> [@rowrrbazzle](#): > > No, they’re “Texas is better for business”. > … > If you don’t improve [California]'s finances, you won’t have any money for rails, tar, feathers, teachers, or abortions. FWIW, [a Christian Science Monitor article](http://www.csmonitor.com/Business/2013/0705/States-with-the-best-and-worst-job-growth/1.-California-2.1-percent) shows California in first-place among all states, for recent job growth percentage. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2013, 11:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/32 "2013-07-30T23:57:26Z")
The man does get bragging rights on some Texas sized stupid, doesn’t he? Texas hasn’t spit forth a moron of Rick’s calibre since W. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2013, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/33 "2013-07-31T02:12:00Z")
I hate having to go back to Oregon and talk to my family about Rick Perry. They often ask how he got into office if everyone hates him so much. I’ve met some extremely conservative folks in my time in Texas, but nary a kind word toward Perry has EVER been spoken in my presence. Everyone hates him. Literally everyone. ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2013, 8:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/34 "2013-08-04T08:50:17Z")
I miss Ann Richards. I was too young to care about her politics, but she was a badass biker granny, so at least she had that going for her. ---
**Author:** ![Sarabellum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarabellum/32/3492_2.png) [@Sarabellum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarabellum)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/35 "2013-08-05T15:04:18Z")
Rick Perry is an embarrassment to Texans. So many reasons. I keep thinking, SURELY… this latest (financial embarrassment, scandal, 5-alarm-arson-attack, good ol’boy nonsense, cronyism, education system) thing he’s gotten himself into… THIS will be the beginning of the end for Perry and he’ll be gone from the scene in a year or two. Sorry about this guy, other 49 states. You DO know they’re grooming [George P. Bush](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/George_P._Bush) these days, though… right? (duck and run) ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/36 "2013-08-05T15:17:17Z")
> [@Shakes](#): > > Rick Perry has always been an embarrassment for us. But a least we used to be able to keep him contained in our own state, so it was easy for us to hide our shame that is Rick Perry. > …snip… > > So yeah, take a look at Lewis Blacks segment on the Daily Show and know that some of us Texans would like to apologize for the giant jack-ass that is Rick Perry. 😃 However, we must admit that occasionally, Governor GoodHair does bring the funny. More often, though, he brings the wince. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/37 "2013-08-05T19:27:25Z")
> [@drewtwo99](#): > > I hate having to go back to Oregon and talk to my family about Rick Perry. They often ask how he got into office if everyone hates him so much. > > I’ve met some extremely conservative folks in my time in Texas, but nary a kind word toward Perry has EVER been spoken in my presence. > > Everyone hates him. Literally everyone. Exactly- just like EVERYBODY hated _ **Armageddon** _ (that’s why it only made 300 million bucks at the box office). And everybody hates McDonald’s (that’s why there are boarded up Mickey D’s everywhere you look). And everybody hates Creed (hence, the poor guys in the band are on food stamps). Rick Perry keeps winning elections because NOBODY likes him. ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/38 "2013-08-05T19:35:11Z")
> [@astorian](#): > > Exactly- just like EVERYBODY hated _ **Armageddon** _ (that’s why it only made 300 million bucks at the box office). And everybody hates McDonald’s (that’s why there are boarded up Mickey D’s everywhere you look). And everybody hates Creed (hence, the poor guys in the band are on food stamps). > > Rick Perry keeps winning elections because NOBODY likes him. Rick Perry keeps winning elections DESPITE the fact that nobody likes him. Fixed it for you. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/39 "2013-08-05T21:15:09Z")
Wasn’t it Louisiana back in the 80s that gave the people a choice between a (rumored) Klansman and someone who had been brought up on fraud charges earlier? Found it: Duke vs Edwards 1991. Given choices like that, and what’s happened in TX, maybe we need a ballot option like Brewster’s Millions “None of the Above” ---
**Author:** ![Irishman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b487fb/32.png) [@Irishman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Irishman)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2013, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928/40 "2013-08-05T22:12:49Z")
Jeez, Perry is a flaming jackass, and I hate that the Repubs control this state. So I don’t particularly wish to defend Perry. But I don’t see the point of the hatred on this. He’s just pointing out that other states have more intrusive governments, higher tax rates, etc, and that Texas has “business friendly” legislation. Like, oh, fighting the EPA to keep them from messin’ with our petrochem industry in Houston. By the way, Texas’s [unemployment rate](http://www.bls.gov/web/laus/laumstrk.htm)is 6.5%, vs New York’s 7.5%, New Jersey’s 8.7%, California’s 8.5%, and Illinois’ 9.2%. So what if our budget is low on the backs of our schoolchildren, and who care’s about abortion? We’re “business friendly”! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-id-like-to-apologize-on-behalf-of-the-entire-state-of-texas/663928.md?page=1)