# Guys, what have you or your SO named your penis? And gals, your breasts have a name? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [October 10, 2005, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507 "2005-10-10T05:18:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/61 "2015-11-02T14:42:12Z")
Russel the love muscle ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 4:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/62 "2015-11-02T16:06:06Z")
A zombie penis thread has popped up. I call my breasts my breasts. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/63 "2015-11-02T16:14:12Z")
I call your breasts every Friday night at 8:00 pm cuz that’s when “Happy Days” comes on. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/64 "2015-11-02T18:47:40Z")
Well, mrAru and I haven’t named our private bits, however I have named the 2 cysts in my left breast Ricky and Fred and the one in my right breast Lucy [Lucy and Ricky showed up first about 10 years ago, Fred showed up last spring. We are still waiting for Ethyl to [complete the set](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I_Love_Lucy).] ---
**Author:** ![foolsguinea](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/foolsguinea/32/14751_2.png) [@foolsguinea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/foolsguinea)\ **Post date:** [November 2, 2015, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/65 "2015-11-02T19:50:48Z")
I have this memory of Annie Potts in some movie telling young men not to name their body parts, and I have stuck with that. ---
**Author:** ![ThreadPirateRoberts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a9a28c/32.png) [@ThreadPirateRoberts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThreadPirateRoberts)\ **Post date:** [November 3, 2015, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/66 "2015-11-03T21:39:02Z")
My partner and I refer to his penis as Mjolnir and when we are discussing happy fun play time it’s “Hammer Time” ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/67 "2015-11-09T05:05:06Z")
My wife calls him The Duke. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/68 "2015-11-09T19:49:24Z")
> [@ThreadPirateRoberts](#): > > My partner and I refer to his penis as Mjolnir and when we are discussing happy fun play time it’s “Hammer Time” Yeah, it’s all fun until she says, “You can’t touch this!” FTR, no name for any part of me. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/69 "2015-11-09T19:57:33Z")
> [@Bullitt](#): > > My wife calls him The Duke. Paraphrased: Pretty bold for a one eyed, fat man-part ---
**Author:** ![rsat3acr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/a3d4f5/32.png) [@rsat3acr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rsat3acr)\ **Post date:** [November 9, 2015, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/70 "2015-11-09T23:05:36Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > Paraphrased: > > Pretty bold for a one eyed, fat man-part Does it “fill your hands you son of a bitch”?😃 ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2015, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/71 "2015-11-10T16:49:36Z")
I can’t tell you. What if you steal my penis’s identity? I don’t want a yojimboguy dick impersonator, er, wriggling around. ---
**Author:** ![CT\_Damsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CT\_Damsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CT_Damsel)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2015, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/72 "2015-11-10T17:06:32Z")
I used to call my x’s penis tiny; but not out loud:D ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2015, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/73 "2015-11-10T22:16:16Z")
Had a ROTC instructor in high school who always referred to his as “ol’ Floyd.” ---
**Author:** ![Satchmo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/satchmo/32/4223_2.png) [@Satchmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satchmo)\ **Post date:** [November 10, 2015, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/74 "2015-11-10T23:45:37Z")
Mine have been mentioned already. My wife named mine John Henry after hearing that in the movie North Dallas Forty. If I was to name it, I’d use Vlad the Impaler. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![SeldomSeen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/7ba0ec/32.png) [@SeldomSeen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SeldomSeen)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2015, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/75 "2015-11-11T03:30:57Z")
My ex gave it the name of Omar[(the Tent Maker)](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Omar_the_Tentmaker_(film)) because of an odd propensity forming a tent under the sheets. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2015, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/76 "2015-11-11T16:31:58Z")
Featured in starring roles at the **Jackmannii** household are Oscar and the Golden Globes. ---
**Author:** ![MacdaddyC](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b487fb/32.png) [@MacdaddyC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacdaddyC)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2015, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/77 "2015-11-11T16:36:17Z")
Mighty Mouse. Whenever he comes, the day is saved. ---
**Author:** ![Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/4af34b/32.png) [@Zeke\_N.Destroi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zeke_N.Destroi)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2015, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507/78 "2015-11-11T16:43:49Z")
In high-school a friend of mine (Hank) and I - both less than sexually successful - were discussing this and we decided that our failures were due, in part, to not having named them. So we christened them thus: Hank - Thor the Unwanted Me - Conan the Unconquered Zeke [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/guys-what-have-you-or-your-so-named-your-penis-and-gals-your-breasts-have-a-name/325507.md?page=3)