# Gwyneth gives birth to Apple **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 15, 2004, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270 "2004-05-15T13:35:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![mnemosyne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c4cdca/32.png) [@mnemosyne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mnemosyne)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2004, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/21 "2004-05-15T23:50:33Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > I’ve always been a strong proponent of freedom for the individual, but I’m starting to think we need federal legislation prohibiting celebrities from giving silly names to their children. Quebec has such a code - read the lower section of [this](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a980828.html) article to learn more. I recall reading another story about an immigrant family who wanted to name thir kid Kaka, which was a common name in their country of origin. I don’t recall whether they were allowed to do so, though I would be surprised if they were. I can’t help but laugh at the thought of parents wanting to name their kids Goldorak! ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/22 "2004-05-16T00:09:04Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > “Try telling that to Rumor Willis, Ms Paltrow.” Or Dweezel and Moon Unit Zappa, for that matter. ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/23 "2004-05-16T00:10:12Z")
If I ever have a kid, I’m gonna give it a name with sounds not found in the English language. And it’s got to have diacretics, and maybe some wierd letter like ç or Þ. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/24 "2004-05-16T00:12:05Z")
**emekthian** : Why not just name him after that weird-ass symbol that the artist-formerly-known-as-Prince uses for his name, while you’re at it? ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/25 "2004-05-16T01:36:47Z")
According to IMDb, Dweezil “Was always called Dweezil by his family, but wasn’t registered as such on his birth certificate; the hospital where he’d been born refused to record the unusual name, so father Frank gave him the names of his bandmates. When Dweezil found out about this as a boy, he wanted to make the name official - so his parents took him to legally change it.” Ahmet and Moon Unit and Diva must’ve been born somewhere else. Anyway, if you’re _Frank Zappa_, you can get away with it. Not so with Apple Paltrow. ---
**Author:** ![Zjestika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/8edcca/32.png) [@Zjestika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zjestika)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/26 "2004-05-16T02:30:12Z")
I went to school with a girl named Twinkle! For real. Funny things is, I don’t remember anyone making fun of her. I’m sure she does though. ZJ ---
**Author:** ![kung\_fu\_lola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f4b2a3/32.png) [@kung\_fu\_lola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kung_fu_lola)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/27 "2004-05-16T02:59:12Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > “Try telling that to Rumor Willis, Ms Paltrow.” It’s spelled _Rumer_. As if that makes it any better. Apple. I don’t really think it works as a name, personally. Ah-puhl. Ew. Almost as bad as [Rocco](http://www.roccoritchie.tk). Blech. ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/28 "2004-05-16T03:23:14Z")
> [@mnemosyne](#): > > Quebec has such a code - read the lower section of [this](http://www.straightdope.com/classics/a980828.html) article to learn more. I recall reading another story about an immigrant family who wanted to name thir kid Kaka, which was a common name in their country of origin. I don’t recall whether they were allowed to do so, though I would be surprised if they were. > > I can’t help but laugh at the thought of parents wanting to name their kids Goldorak! [Kaka](http://www.famousmales.net/kaka.html) ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/29 "2004-05-16T04:08:34Z")
You know, it’ll only take one of this girl to spoil the whole bunch… ---
**Author:** ![Loopydude](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e56c9b/32.png) [@Loopydude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loopydude)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/30 "2004-05-16T04:56:55Z")
It’s a stupid fucking name for a chiled. Gwyneth can fuck off and die. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/31 "2004-05-16T05:05:09Z")
The baby weighed 9 lbs 11 ounces. That’s one **Big Apple**. **Loopydude** - I think that’s pit-worthy language. StG ---
**Author:** ![DeadlyAccurate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac91a4/32.png) [@DeadlyAccurate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeadlyAccurate)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/32 "2004-05-16T05:09:32Z")
> [@Loopydude](#): > > It’s a stupid fucking name for a chiled. > > Gwyneth can fuck off and die. Brad? Is that you? ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/33 "2004-05-16T06:01:03Z")
Clearly, when deciding on her child’s name, Gwyneth sought the advice of such great thinkers as Einstein and Gandhi and thought different. ---
**Author:** ![Granuaile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ecccb3/32.png) [@Granuaile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Granuaile)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/34 "2004-05-16T06:35:55Z")
**kung fu lola** … > [@](#): > > Almost as bad as [Rocco](http://www.roccoritchie.tk). Blech. That link _seriously_ creeped me out. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 6:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/35 "2004-05-16T06:39:53Z")
I’m sorry, that should be Apple Martin. Which sounds something like a dessert. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 10:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/36 "2004-05-16T10:04:02Z")
> [@emekthian](#): > > If I ever have a kid, I’m gonna give it a name with sounds not found in the English language. And it’s got to have diacretics, and maybe some wierd letter like ç or Þ. Esperança, hope in Portuguese. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/37 "2004-05-16T12:08:57Z")
If Apple marries a Zappa child, she’ll be **Apple Zappa**. That cracks me up. ---
**Author:** ![Chimpy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@Chimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimpy)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 12:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/38 "2004-05-16T12:21:49Z")
Emekthian- you could name your child something in esperanto using symbols like that. ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/39 "2004-05-16T13:47:37Z")
Could be worse, she could’ve been named Durian! What a stinker. ---
**Author:** ![kung\_fu\_lola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/f4b2a3/32.png) [@kung\_fu\_lola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kung_fu_lola)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2004, 2:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270/40 "2004-05-16T14:56:33Z")
> [@Granuaile](#): > > **kung fu lola** … > That link _seriously_ creeped me out. Yeah, I know. Not even the fans can stomach Lemmy and Julie. If you feel like more creepies, go here. Back on topic, how long do you think it will be before Apple has her own website? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/gwyneth-gives-birth-to-apple/245270.md?page=3)