# Ha ha ha ha ha HA HA HA ha ha! \[Michele Bachman for President\] **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 6, 2011, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558 "2011-01-06T01:17:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/61 "2011-01-07T02:16:23Z")
> [@ElvisL1ves](#): > > West said that, although he has not spoken with all of the new members, he hoped that Congress would focus on the “infiltration of the Sharia practice into all of our operating systems… Wow! All of them? MVS? Linux? MS Windows? I can see that one – Bill Gates would no doubt be pleased if Sharia law applied, and anyone using a pirated copy had their hands chopped off. But what about Linux? ---
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Jocko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/uncle_jocko/32/2932_2.png) [@Uncle\_Jocko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Jocko)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/62 "2011-01-07T02:28:49Z")
You know, as an Iowan, it was so much fun to point and laugh at the crazy Minnesotans, sendin’ that wacky-eyed people’s hero Michele Bachmann to the House again and again. Such fun we had, hearing the crazy stories about hiding behind bushes and smokin’ out non-American Presidents and whatnot! Of course, we have our own Taliban House member, Steve King (and a King/Bachmann ticket in 2012 would indeed bring the apocalypse and black out the sun … but it also would get rid of our illegal immigrant problem once and for all), but we could still chortle at Minnesota’s own Michele. Imagine the jaw-dropping horror I experienced just today, when I discovered … _Michele Bachmann was BORN in Iowa_. Waterloo, to be exact, just an hour up the road from me. Ye Gods! I knew parts of this state are, well, set in their ways, to put it mildly, but I’d never imagined my native Hawkeye state could have produced both King and Bachmann, two House members and Tea Party evangelists extraordinaire. Geez louise. At least the state had the good sense to chase Michele north across the border before she achieved self-awareness. Don’t send her back! You hear? ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/63 "2011-01-07T02:44:36Z")
King/Bachmann? Hmmmm… ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/64 "2011-01-07T03:00:20Z")
> [@Guinastasia](#): > > King/Bachmann? Hmmmm… Well, if it was Queen Bachman, people would think you were referring to her husband! ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/65 "2011-01-07T03:22:47Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > Well, if it was Queen Bachman, people would think you were referring to her husband! [Whoosh!](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Bachman) ---
**Author:** ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/66 "2011-01-07T04:23:03Z")
> [@Duckster](#): > > A play on a 1970s Canadian rock band and one of their hit songs. Do we have to explain _everything_ here? > 😃 ‘Takin’ Care of Business’ - a song written by… Randy **Bachmann**. I smell conspiracy. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/67 "2011-01-07T04:37:18Z")
I’ve started to work on the porn script for _Nailin’ Palin III: Knockin’ Bachmann_. It will be a 90 minute movie with nearly three pages of dialog. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/68 "2011-01-07T04:48:45Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > Their comment is, “ **Any** of the Republican candidates winning in 2012 would be a disaster for the country. So work to nominate the unelectable one.” Makes you wonder how many Dems might have re-registered so they could vote for W in the 2000 GOP primaries . . . ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/69 "2011-01-07T05:17:08Z")
I can totally see how any Republican, regardless of background or qualifications, would decide to just announce. I mean, if there are people out there sending money to Palin, who\* isn’t\* qualified? You know, this might just be the perfect job for Ted Williams. . . The fact is that for decades the Republican party has been making it’s decision based almost exclusively upon name recognition. The sooner you can get your name out there, and the more people you can get discussing it, the more likely you are to be nominated. Furthermore, if she does manage to pull in the donations, the GOP will interpret this as a mandate from the American people, and feel obligated to grant her some high position. This move alone could net her the SecState position. Which, not matter how badly she screws it up, could make her seem qualified to run four years later. It’s a nightmare. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/46a35a/32.png) [@Tim\_T-Bonham.net](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_T-Bonham.net)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 5:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/70 "2011-01-07T05:29:13Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > Makes you wonder how many Dems might have re-registered so they could vote for W in the 2000 GOP primaries . . . Not many. Unlike what is expected in 2012, there was no sitting incumbent Democrat running for President. Democrats had a choice between Gore & Bradley (with Kerry, Gephardt, Wellstone, & others waiting in the wings). And it started out close – less than 5% apart – so most Democrats would have stayed in their own primaries, to make a difference there. And in half the states, you don’t have to register in one particular party – they are open, and you just choose which one to vote in on Caucus or Primary Day. ---
**Author:** ![Capitaine\_Zombie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e95f7d/32.png) [@Capitaine\_Zombie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capitaine_Zombie)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/71 "2011-01-07T05:39:48Z")
> [@Boyo\_Jim](#): > > I’ve started to work on the porn script for _Nailin’ Palin III: Knockin’ Bachmann_. It will be a 90 minute movie with nearly three pages of dialog. Those three pages of dialogue will be hell to shoot (Jack Donaghy style). ---
**Author:** ![Sitnam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Sitnam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sitnam)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/72 "2011-01-07T07:38:53Z")
> [@fuzzypickles](#): > > You Minnesota people may think you’ve got it bad, but unlike California, at least you never elected a major celebrity as your state governor. > > Oh, wait…n/m. 🆒 You know, I don’t think Ventura or Schwarzenegger did so badly. You don’t have to be a celebrity to become a Blagojevich, Spitzer, Edwards, Sanford etc. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Call\_Me\_Shirley](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Don\_t\_Call\_Me\_Shirley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Call_Me_Shirley)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/73 "2011-01-07T13:31:45Z")
> [@elucidator](#): > > “It’s a trap!” - Admiral Akbar > > The Intelligence Committe is loads of prestige, but not much air time. The first rule of Intel Club is you can’t talk about what goes on in Intel Club. There is no way she’ll be able to keep her mouth shut. No way. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/74 "2011-01-07T13:48:00Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > And Jesse Ventura never killed anybody with his bare hands – not even in a movie. Yeah, he did. _Running Man_, where he wasted the two hapless stunt performers who’d been subbed in for the characters Arnold and Maria Conchita Alonso were playing. ---
**Author:** ![42fish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/4/b487fb/32.png) [@42fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/42fish)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/75 "2011-01-07T14:48:00Z")
> [@TruCelt](#): > > I can totally see how any Republican, regardless of background or qualifications, would decide to just announce. I mean, if there are people out there sending money to Palin, who\* isn’t\* qualified? > > You know, this might just be the perfect job for Ted Williams. . . Ted Williams the ballplayer in cryonics suspension, or is there another Ted Williams out there? (Although Ted Williams’ defrosted head does seem at least as qualified as Michele Bachmann.) ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/76 "2011-01-07T14:51:19Z")
If you defrost it, aren’t you being unfair to Bachmann? ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/77 "2011-01-07T16:01:57Z")
> [@42fish](#): > > Ted Williams the ballplayer in cryonics suspension, or is there another Ted Williams out there? [This guy](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O6kI_u3ho_c). ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/78 "2011-01-07T16:08:43Z")
If Christianity got one thing right over Islam it is that they didn’t give a name to making their religious practice into law. They are smart enough to do it in a clandestine manner. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/79 "2011-01-07T16:19:04Z")
> [@Don\_t\_Call\_Me\_Shirley](#): > > There is no way she’ll be able to keep her mouth shut. No way. She might be smart enough not to blab about actual classified material, but at the least she’ll make shit up and _claim_ she knows it because of classified intelligence briefings. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2011, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558/80 "2011-01-07T17:40:50Z")
> [@t-bonham@scc.net](#): > > Wow! All of them? MVS? Linux? MS Windows? I can see that one – Bill Gates would no doubt be pleased if Sharia law applied, and anyone using a pirated copy had their hands chopped off. But what about Linux? Always thought the name Ubuntu sounded un-American. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-michele-bachman-for-president/566558.md?page=5)