# Ha! Ha! Hank Johnson thinks Guam could capsize **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [April 1, 2010, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578 "2010-04-01T15:09:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/21 "2010-04-01T16:17:19Z")
It would be the biggest whoosh ever, right? ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/22 "2010-04-01T16:30:14Z")
Tip o the day. Dont pretend to be REALLY stupid unless most folks know you REALLY arent. And even then, put in some subtle clues that the whole things a joke. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/23 "2010-04-01T16:31:16Z")
I was laughing along with everyone else until I learned that Rep. Johnson suffers from Hepatitis C, and that the treatments from that have affected his concentration. So I won’t call the man an idiot - though I will note with sadness that he probably has reached the point that he no longer can represent his district. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/24 "2010-04-01T16:35:42Z")
Bit of a stretch to blame medically-induced loss of concentration. Assuming he wasn’t being sarcastic, the comment displays a pretty fundamental misapprehension of physical geography and geomorphogeny, which isn’t (IMHO) a concentration issue. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/25 "2010-04-01T16:39:33Z")
Might be so, but considering his overall demeanor wasn’t quite right, and given that he has documented health problems, I’m just not inclined to pile on. By no means does that imply any endorsement of his reelection - my general posting history ought to make that clear. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/26 "2010-04-01T16:41:52Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > …geomorphogeny… Don’t know what that is, you liberal smarty-pants, but I’m willing to bet its something homo. ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/27 "2010-04-01T16:42:18Z")
Don’t worry. I know where your bread is buttered. 😉 Anyway, even if it _is_ due to his treatment, I can’t very well excuse him for that. If he can’t carry out the duties of his office he should resign. [QUOTE=luci] Don’t know what that is, you liberal smarty-pants, but I’m willing to bet its something homo. [/QUOTE] Well, sort of. A big part of it is the study of phallic landmasses and geographic features. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/28 "2010-04-01T16:46:26Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Don’t worry. I know where your bread is buttered. 😉 > > Anyway, even if it _is_ due to his treatment, I can’t very well excuse him for that. If he can’t carry out the duties of his office he should resign. > > Well, sort of. A big part of it is the study of phallic landmasses and geographic features. Like mossy fiords and straight rigid penninsulas? Cause, man, that stuff rocks. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/29 "2010-04-01T16:46:29Z")
If you notice, he has a very hard time finding the words to express the idea that Guam is “4 miles wide at its narrowest point and 9 miles wide at its widest point.” I’ve seen Johnson speaking before and he didn’t seem this inarticulate. I think it’s plausible that he was trying to use the “so many people it might tip over” concept as some kind of odd metaphor for expressing worry about environmental impact. The information offered by **Mr. Moto** seems to support that he was trying something like that but that the effects of his medication made it come out all wrong. ---
**Author:** ![Acsenray](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/acsenray/32/4519_2.png) [@Acsenray](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acsenray)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/30 "2010-04-01T16:48:27Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Anyway, even if it _is_ due to his treatment, I can’t very well excuse him for that. If he can’t carry out the duties of his office he should resign. Seriously? Medication for a treatable illness that make him kind of inarticulate temporarily means he should resign? What about if he gets the 'flu and can’t make it to work for several weeks? ---
**Author:** ![magellan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@magellan01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magellan01)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/31 "2010-04-01T16:54:28Z")
Ouch. That was painful to watch. I’d like to see some other video of him to see the degree to which his manner might have been due to drugs he might be taking for his illness. On the other hand, I can see how his illness might result in him being slow or lethargic, but I can’t imagine how it would cause someone to spout some nonsense such as “we must make sure the sky is safe for our flying kittens”. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/32 "2010-04-01T16:57:55Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > Tip o the day. I see what you did there. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/33 "2010-04-01T16:59:42Z")
> [@acsenray](#): > > Seriously? Medication for a treatable illness that make him kind of inarticulate temporarily means he should resign? What about if he gets the 'flu and can’t make it to work for several weeks? For [24 to 48 weeks](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hepatitis_C#Treatment) out of a two-year term? Yes. ETA: I’m not saying he _can’t_ do his job. I don’t know him from Adam and I’m not going to base my assessment of his impairment on two minutes of video footage. I’m saying _if_ he can’t perform his job duties (for such a significant period of time) he should resign. ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/34 "2010-04-01T17:14:15Z")
> [@acsenray](#): > > Seriously? Medication for a treatable illness that make him kind of inarticulate temporarily means he should resign? Medication that makes you inarticulate should certainly make you think about calling in sick to a Congressional hearing where you are expected to provide articulate and pointed questions - yes. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/35 "2010-04-01T18:18:40Z")
Holy shit, that’s amazingly ignorant. I had a Donald Duck comic book when I was a very young kid, and it had a floating island. I wonder if he had the same one and took it a bit too seriously? ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/36 "2010-04-01T18:22:18Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > ETA: I’m not saying he _can’t_ do his job. I don’t know him from Adam and I’m not going to base my assessment of his impairment on two minutes of video footage. I’m saying _if_ he can’t perform his job duties (for such a significant period of time) he should resign. Given that a politician’s REAL job is running for office, I’d say this situation is self correcting. ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/37 "2010-04-01T18:31:59Z")
> [@](#): > > I had a Donald Duck comic book when I was a very young kid, and it had a floating island. I wonder if he had the same one and took it a bit too seriously? That was one of Carl Barks’ Uncle Scrooge comics. A classic. The idea of floating islands is an old one in fiction. Jules Verne wrote a novel about one – **Propellor Island**. Floating Islands in fiction never seem to come to good ends – they invariably get on a collision course with something and/or sink. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/38 "2010-04-01T18:48:56Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Ha! Ha! Hank Johnson thinks Guam could capsize… Informed sources tell him that Saddam’s WMD’s are scheduled to arrive at Apra Harbor on the night of the next new moon, April 14th. The weapon’s combined mass is enough to capsize islands _far larger_ than Guam alone. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 8:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/39 "2010-04-01T20:53:55Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#): > > Now I’m wondering what percentage of other Americans think islands can capsize. Probably more than you want to know. ---
**Author:** ![Squink](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b5e925/32.png) [@Squink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Squink)\ **Post date:** [April 1, 2010, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578/40 "2010-04-01T21:04:31Z")
[Floating island](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Floating_island) > [@](#): > > A floating island is a mass of floating aquatic plants, mud, and peat ranging in thickness from a few inches to several feet. Floating islands are a common natural phenomenon that are found in many parts of the world. They exist less commonly as a man-made phenomenon. Floating islands are generally found on marshlands, lakes, and similar wetland locations, and can be many hectares in size. Then you’ve got your [pumice rafts.](http://earthobservatory.nasa.gov/IOTD/view.php?id=7124) Who is to say that Guam is not one of these oddities of nature? On occasion, Sarah Palin has even seen such capsizements _from her own window!_ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ha-ha-hank-johnson-thinks-guam-could-capsize/534578.md?page=3)