# Haiku Madness Part Deux **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [October 3, 2020, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141 "2020-10-03T19:26:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 74
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2022, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1461 "2022-07-10T01:49:40Z")
Lasik surgery scares me, I have to admit only got two eyes ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2022, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1462 "2022-07-10T02:00:48Z")
Only got two eyes; wouldn’t be a problem if I weren’t a spider. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2022, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1463 "2022-07-10T17:30:05Z")
I weren’t a spider and I weren’t a bug, either; I were a human! ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2022, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1464 "2022-07-10T19:54:54Z")
I were a human We was also a human. I aren’t do grammar. ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2022, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1465 "2022-07-11T01:08:33Z")
I aren’t do grammar And it don’t make some matter Me prefer grandper ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2022, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1466 "2022-07-12T22:01:46Z")
“Me prefer grandper,” she said, so of course I left; I don’t date idjits ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2022, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1467 "2022-07-13T16:39:10Z")
I don’t date idjits because the last time i tried i was ten years out. ---
**Author:** ![Gyrate](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gyrate/32/3588_2.png) [@Gyrate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gyrate)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2022, 10:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1468 "2022-07-14T10:12:24Z")
I was ten years out And ended up in Dallas In '73. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2022, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1469 "2022-07-14T20:19:31Z")
In '73 I was really just a kid but now I’m older ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2022, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1470 "2022-07-16T02:49:04Z")
But now I’m older I have never been this old Ever in my life. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2022, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1471 "2022-07-16T11:20:18Z")
“Ever In My Life” Was title of Beatles song 'til John shortened it ---
**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2022, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1472 "2022-07-16T22:22:24Z")
'Til John shortened it the cookie batter would not ever come out right. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2022, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1473 "2022-07-17T20:49:21Z")
Ever come out right the goal of some gay people but not all, of course ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [July 18, 2022, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1474 "2022-07-18T00:07:31Z")
But not all, of course I’m not a pig, scoop up Just 30 flavors ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [July 19, 2022, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1475 "2022-07-19T04:50:33Z")
Just 30 flavors Of lip balm is all I ask For my simple tastes. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2022, 11:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1476 "2022-07-20T11:56:22Z")
For my simple tastes Just a jar of Jif and a Box of Ritz crackers ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2022, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1477 "2022-07-22T20:59:18Z")
Box of Ritz Crackers, Pimento cheese and my own Cold Coca-Cola. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2022, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1478 "2022-07-23T00:56:52Z")
Cold Coca-Cola And Funky Cold Medina Both must be kept chilled ---
**Author:** ![boson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boson/32/11407_2.png) [@boson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/boson)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2022, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1479 "2022-07-23T03:29:31Z")
Both must be kept cold If they are kept way too hot They’ll be joined all night. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [July 23, 2022, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141/1480 "2022-07-23T03:57:51Z")
They’ll be joined all night because I used Super Glue a terrible joke [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141.md?page=73) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness-part-deux/922141.md?page=75)