# Haiku Madness **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 22, 2010, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955 "2010-02-22T07:27:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 192
**Author:** ![CCYMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/87869e/32.png) [@CCYMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CCYMan)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3822 "2011-05-10T21:18:41Z")
Sigh, if only me, fixing teeth instead of toys, I’m Herbie the elf. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2011, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3823 "2011-05-10T21:49:34Z")
I’m Herbie the Elf! Hey little boy, want candy? Just reach in my pants. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 12:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3824 "2011-05-11T12:56:48Z")
Just reach in my pants For your tip, said the leper To the prostitute ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_of\_Lucan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dbc845/32.png) [@Michael\_of\_Lucan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_of_Lucan)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 1:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3825 "2011-05-11T13:38:01Z")
To the Prostitute Rescue lady he said, “No, I give directly”. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3826 "2011-05-11T14:49:24Z")
“I gave directly” She shrieked horrifically then Shot blood from her eyes ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3827 "2011-05-11T17:09:05Z")
Shot blood from her eyes Right into Dracula’s mouth. “Two points” he enthused. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3828 "2011-05-11T17:25:30Z")
“Two points” he enthused: One: you’re an ignoramus And two: you’re ugly ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3829 "2011-05-11T19:56:11Z")
And two: you’re ugly And three: You’re an awful bitch That’s why I love you ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3830 "2011-05-11T20:00:39Z")
That’s why I love you: A flat head to set my drink, Three feet tall, no teeth. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3831 "2011-05-11T20:11:51Z")
Three feet tall, no teeth And is too tired to chase you Worst monster ever ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2011, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3832 "2011-05-11T21:57:25Z")
Worst monster ever? A huge ancient red dragon allergic to fire. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3833 "2011-05-12T02:49:37Z")
allergic to fire, I am. I take Benadryl before making S’mores ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3834 "2011-05-12T15:30:35Z")
Before making S’mores You will need a big bonfire Use this can of gas ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3835 "2011-05-12T15:59:51Z")
“Use this can of gas To put out your massive blaze” Said the arsonist. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_of\_Lucan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dbc845/32.png) [@Michael\_of\_Lucan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_of_Lucan)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3836 "2011-05-12T16:28:19Z")
Too slow. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_of\_Lucan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dbc845/32.png) [@Michael\_of\_Lucan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_of_Lucan)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3837 "2011-05-12T16:36:14Z")
Said the arsonist, “It’s not just a hobby - it’s A burning passion”. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3838 "2011-05-12T18:24:53Z")
A burning passion Jalapeños and I share May we never part ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2011, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3839 "2011-05-12T22:12:29Z")
“May we never part,” I said fondly to my hair Then it all fell out ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3840 "2011-05-13T01:59:14Z")
Then it all fell out, But I don’t have to shampoo, So I save big bucks. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2011, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/3841 "2011-05-13T16:05:05Z")
So I save big bucks As I also aves some does Then they fawn on me [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=191) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=193)