# Haiku Madness **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 22, 2010, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955 "2010-02-22T07:27:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 228
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4543 "2011-11-23T18:34:04Z")
Freddy, bring more beer with brandy and the number of a good hooker. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [November 23, 2011, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4544 "2011-11-23T21:07:09Z")
Of a good hooker, It’s said you pay not for sex, But for her to leave. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4545 "2011-11-24T15:16:21Z")
But for her to leave Would mean we’re done, and I am Just getting started! ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 10:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4546 "2011-11-24T22:27:14Z")
Just getting started! Thanksgiving festivities Who wants some vodka? ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4547 "2011-11-24T22:30:55Z")
Who wants some vodka soaked tampons stuffed in their snatch? Martini. Shaken. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4548 "2011-11-25T13:05:26Z")
Martini shaken Rossi was stepping out with The Gallos last night ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4549 "2011-11-25T16:42:24Z")
The gallos last night Had fellos with bellos and A yello pillo ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4550 "2011-11-25T19:24:59Z")
A yello pillo Since Bush was so disgusting, I can’t type “Dubya” ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4551 "2011-11-26T01:00:08Z")
I can’t type “Dubya” without also typing “You Ignorant Douchebag!” ---
**Author:** ![The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5f8ce5/32.png) [@The\_Peyote\_Coyote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Peyote_Coyote)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4552 "2011-11-26T20:38:07Z")
Ignorant Douchebag! Coprophagous stinking swine! You shouldn’t call names! ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 9:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4553 "2011-11-26T21:15:27Z")
You shouldn’t call names Unless playing the dozens Like [Bo Diddley](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HIWgNKUMlzM) did (Sound recording, but lyrics should otherwise be SFW) ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2011, 2:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4554 "2011-11-27T14:47:08Z")
Like Bo Diddley did I’m inventing my own style It’s the Mustard Beat ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2011, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4555 "2011-11-27T18:37:47Z")
It’s the Mustard Beat Do it fast or you will have to ketchup with me. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2011, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4556 "2011-11-27T22:39:25Z")
to ketchup with me you can’t be mayon-lazy unless you’re dressing ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4557 "2011-11-28T03:51:50Z")
Unless you’re dressing You shouldn’t plan to attend That black tie affair ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 2:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4558 "2011-11-28T14:41:11Z")
That black tie affair So tie a black tie round your old oak tree penis. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4559 "2011-11-28T17:28:18Z")
“Old Oak Tree Penis” Was what she called me, due to My stout morning wood. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4560 "2011-11-28T18:09:28Z")
My stout morning wood Shows that I am just all bark I’ll knot pine for fir ---
**Author:** ![ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ComeToTheDarkSideWeHaveCookies)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4561 "2011-11-28T21:23:38Z")
I’ll knot pine for fir But not tie elm for maple I have principles ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2011, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/4562 "2011-11-28T22:52:50Z")
I have principles But did Werner Heisenberg? I can’t be certain [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=227) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=229)