# Haiku Madness **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 22, 2010, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955 "2010-02-22T07:27:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 30
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 3:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/581 "2010-03-08T03:16:49Z")
Baloney! says I pastrami, turkey and ham! meat gnaws at my soul ---
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/582 "2010-03-08T03:53:33Z")
Meat gnaws at my soul but I wish I could eat carbs diabetes bites ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/583 "2010-03-08T04:31:54Z")
Diabetes bites or I do… but what? That’s the real conundrum here. ---
**Author:** ![Biotop](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biotop/32/321_2.png) [@Biotop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biotop)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/584 "2010-03-08T04:51:36Z")
real conundrum here of the chicken or the egg which of these came first? ---
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Uncle\_Goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Goat)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/585 "2010-03-08T13:05:33Z")
Which of these came first: fear of death or fear of life? Depends on your view ---
**Author:** ![melodyharmonius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/melodyharmonius/32/21310_2.png) [@melodyharmonius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melodyharmonius)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/586 "2010-03-08T13:18:00Z")
Depends on your view Lead dog or lead dog’s behind I know which I choose. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/587 "2010-03-08T13:53:15Z")
I know which I choose betwixt liver and doughnuts nicely glazed, yes please ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/588 "2010-03-08T14:24:37Z")
nicely glazed, please with fava beans and a nice Chianti–great meal! ---
**Author:** ![LateComer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5ac83/32.png) [@LateComer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LateComer)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/589 "2010-03-08T15:16:54Z")
Chianti–great meal! Can’t think of a joke about Silence of the Lambs. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/590 "2010-03-08T15:34:09Z")
Silence of the lambs They’re very quiet when they’re cooked Dinner shouldn’t scream ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/591 "2010-03-08T15:54:14Z")
Dinner shouldn’t scream but if its that delicious I can ignore it. ---
**Author:** ![melodyharmonius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/melodyharmonius/32/21310_2.png) [@melodyharmonius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melodyharmonius)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/592 "2010-03-08T16:05:56Z")
I can ignore it When you burp or fart near me but not in my face. ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/593 "2010-03-08T16:42:16Z")
“But not in my face!” she yelled, with disgust, at the man in the porno. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/594 "2010-03-08T17:06:48Z")
Man in the porno Has an awesome, thick 'stache And I am jealous ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/595 "2010-03-08T17:37:45Z")
And I am jealous for all the nookie he’s had… if not STDs. ---
**Author:** ![otternell](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecc23a/32.png) [@otternell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/otternell)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/596 "2010-03-08T17:48:21Z")
If not STD’s than what would cause that discharge? you should have wrapped it. ---
**Author:** ![phungi](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/phungi/32/395_2.png) [@phungi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/phungi)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/597 "2010-03-08T18:07:58Z")
you should have wrapped it third trimester sex denied friction is your friend ---
**Author:** ![melodyharmonius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/melodyharmonius/32/21310_2.png) [@melodyharmonius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melodyharmonius)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/598 "2010-03-08T18:21:16Z")
Friction is your friend It brings on a happy end but please use the wet. ---
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Uncle\_Goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Goat)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/599 "2010-03-08T18:31:13Z")
But please use the wet nap provided in the kit for easy clean up ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [March 8, 2010, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/600 "2010-03-08T18:45:32Z")
For easy clean up Use your blowtorch because it cleans and disinfects [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=29) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=31)