# Haiku Madness **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 22, 2010, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955 "2010-02-22T07:27:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 301
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2013, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6003 "2013-04-28T03:59:17Z")
I’m too old and tired To stay up 'til three-thirty. Time to hit the hay! ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2013, 12:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6004 "2013-04-28T12:00:50Z")
Time to hit the hay! Let’s go for a roll in it, Let’s go scratch an itch. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2013, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6005 "2013-04-28T15:37:58Z")
Let’s go scratch an itch! Hike up your shirt and dig it Until it bleeds red. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2013, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6006 "2013-04-28T17:11:22Z")
Until it bleeds red And kills Celine Dion dead. My heart will go on. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2013, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6007 "2013-04-28T18:08:14Z")
My heart will go on Until Celine Dion’s corpse Is laid at my feet. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2013, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6008 "2013-04-28T21:12:58Z")
“Is” laid at my feet; “Are” castrated, “Be” cut down; Grammar am real dead! ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 12:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6009 "2013-04-29T12:33:06Z")
Grammar am real dead Not here on the Dope, no way Spelling counts, as well ---
**Author:** ![drewtwo99](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/d07c76/32.png) [@drewtwo99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drewtwo99)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 12:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6010 "2013-04-29T12:46:49Z")
Spelling counts, as well But what the fuck is the point? deaht to gud speling! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6011 "2013-04-29T12:50:47Z")
deaht to guf speling! And deaht to Torry Speling! On my Deathpool list. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6012 "2013-04-29T12:52:30Z")
Deaht to gud speling? Try to Dope-post misspellings And you’ll be jumped on Annie! Ninja’d me again… _ **In play:** _ On my Deathpool List Some infamous co-workers I’m damned glad she is gone! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 12:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6013 "2013-04-29T12:59:23Z")
On my Deathpool list … And you’ll be jumped on I haven’t had a hit this year…If your blackjack hand is weak So somebody hit me… So somebody hit me ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 1:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6014 "2013-04-29T13:00:37Z")
I’m damned glad she is gone! Bad spelling in Haiku good. Bad counting not good.\* \*The first line should have read “I’m damned glad she’s gone!” ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 1:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6015 "2013-04-29T13:05:08Z")
Bad counting not good Said my Sensei, Miyagi Yeah… wax on, wax off ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6016 "2013-04-29T13:06:33Z")
Yeah… wax on, wax off, Clap on, clap off, The Clapper! So… Klingon, Klingoff. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 1:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6017 "2013-04-29T13:50:13Z")
So… Klingon, Klingoff Remember L. Klinghoffer? Achille Lauro ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6018 "2013-04-29T13:58:54Z")
Achille Lauro ? Nope, I’ve never heard of him Oh, it was a ship? ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 2:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6019 "2013-04-29T14:05:06Z")
Oh, it was a ship? I heard of the Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6020 "2013-04-29T14:07:03Z")
Edmund Fitzgerald? No, Khayyam’s Rubaiyat: Edward Fitzgerald. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 2:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6021 "2013-04-29T14:10:42Z")
Edward Fitzgerald Hey, that name’s got a rhyming It’s got a jingle ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2013, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/6022 "2013-04-29T14:13:07Z")
It’s got a jingle And his name is my name too John Jacob Heimer. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=300) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=302)