# Haiku Madness **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [February 22, 2010, 7:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955 "2010-02-22T07:27:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 40
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Uncle\_Goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Goat)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/781 "2010-03-15T02:30:12Z")
Ouch! Son of a bitch! Last time I use toilet brush Instead of paper ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/782 "2010-03-15T03:59:05Z")
Instead of paper why not cunieform tablets? Sumeria rulz! ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/783 "2010-03-15T11:32:11Z")
Sumeria rulz! They didn’t shove tubes up butts Colonoscopy ---
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Uncle\_Goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Goat)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/784 "2010-03-15T12:42:55Z")
Colonoscopy Monday here we go again I need better job ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/785 "2010-03-15T13:31:32Z")
I need better job, bigger house, much more money And some “a’s” and “the’s” ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/786 "2010-03-15T13:36:17Z")
And some “a’s” and “the’s” These are unused articles Send them to Goodwill ---
**Author:** ![melodyharmonius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/melodyharmonius/32/21310_2.png) [@melodyharmonius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melodyharmonius)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/787 "2010-03-15T15:13:22Z")
Send them to Goodwill Send them to craigslist as well Lots of great stuff there ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/788 "2010-03-15T15:32:28Z")
Lots of great stuff there On the craig’s list, you can get Rugs, old toys, and sex ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/789 "2010-03-15T16:33:30Z")
Rugs, old toys, and sex? I think you can also get Old rugs and sex toys ---
**Author:** ![melodyharmonius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/melodyharmonius/32/21310_2.png) [@melodyharmonius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/melodyharmonius)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/790 "2010-03-15T17:17:15Z")
Old rugs and sex toys 2 things you should never beat Unless you’re dirty. ---
**Author:** ![palindromemordnilap](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/db5fbb/32.png) [@palindromemordnilap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/palindromemordnilap)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/791 "2010-03-15T17:56:38Z")
Unless you’re dirty You won’t want me to clean you The way a cat would ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/792 "2010-03-15T18:00:46Z")
the way a cat would react when he’s embarrassed? Not be embarrassed. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/793 "2010-03-15T18:10:36Z")
Not be embarrassed? Twain said cats and dogs are not; only people are. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/794 "2010-03-15T19:44:31Z")
Only people are Embarrassed, or need to be (aforementioned Twain) ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/795 "2010-03-15T19:52:36Z")
Aforementioned Twain Said much, but lots of “his” quotes Never left his mouth ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 8:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/796 "2010-03-15T20:10:42Z")
Never left his mouth His tongue did; it was always Firmly in his cheek ---
**Author:** ![Uncle\_Goat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Uncle\_Goat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncle_Goat)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2010, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/797 "2010-03-15T21:25:34Z")
Firmly in his cheek was a plug of tobacco Cancer chewed him up ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2010, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/798 "2010-03-16T13:20:25Z")
cancer chewed him up then, of course, it spit him out he did not taste good ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2010, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/799 "2010-03-16T13:27:20Z")
He did not taste good, but a heart attack killed Twain, not cancer, you know. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [March 16, 2010, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955/800 "2010-03-16T13:36:49Z")
not cancer, you know born with Halley’s Comet, and He died with it, too. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=39) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/haiku-madness/529955.md?page=41)