# Halloween goes Horribly Wrong **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 1, 2002, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832 "2002-11-01T13:08:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![WomanofScorn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b5a626/32.png) [@WomanofScorn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WomanofScorn)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2003, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/41 "2003-10-05T02:56:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by welby \* > > I’m in heaven. I’m screaming like a madman, the remaining kids appear too scared to move, and then little Melissa, 11 years old, whirls and delivers a snap kick to my nuts that would have Bruce Lee asking for lessons. Her sister, nice little Jennifer who wouldn’t hurt a fly, beans me on the head with her plastic bucket, half full of candy. In the rush to leave, my hand gets stepped on and my head is kicked once. I’ve just gotten my ass kicked by two little girls and their entourage of sugar feinds. This part had me cackling like a mad woman. You almost made snot fly from my nose as I’m suffering a cold, heh. Even hubby was looking at me like I’m insane. good stuff man, good stuff. ---
**Author:** ![StanDup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@StanDup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StanDup)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2003, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/42 "2003-10-05T05:56:24Z")
BAHAHAHAHAAHAH-Ahem… Great story. ::snicker:: ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2003, 7:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/43 "2003-10-05T07:43:47Z")
Well, I would see this thread now that I’ve moved to assboink, Virginia. Now, not only can I NOT kick **welby** in the nuts, I can’t really do what he did last year (sans injury): 1. We live in a very small neighborhood. 2. The front yard is a hill. 3. The kids are either my age or 6. Maybe I can cajole **fizzy** and her sister into joining up with me to scare the ever-living sugar high out of their neighborhood kids… [sub]Cup. Gotta remember the cup.[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2003, 11:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/44 "2003-10-05T11:46:16Z")
I remember this from last year, and it’s just as funny now. We’ll be expecting your post on 11/1/03, **welby**! ---
**Author:** ![Padeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a9a28c/32.png) [@Padeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Padeye)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2003, 12:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/45 "2003-10-05T12:28:53Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Lsura \* > \*\*I promise I’ve been a good girl this year. \*\* Haven’t you noticed that’s it the bad girls who get the best haul of loot from Santa? ---
**Author:** ![Master\_Wang-Ka](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/master_wang-ka/32/3325_2.png) [@Master\_Wang-Ka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Master_Wang-Ka)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2003, 2:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/46 "2003-10-05T14:20:29Z")
“Come back and I’ll bite your legs off!” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2003, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/47 "2003-10-05T15:53:34Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by welby \* > \*\*The welby household at Halloween is a cornucopia of fun for welbyfamily, but especially for me. The traditions are strong, and passed down through generations, much more so than say, Christmas or Thanksgiving. This year, things went Horribly Wrong. > > …snip…\*\* ROTFLMAO! That’s absolutely great. I always try to scare the snot out of the kiddies at Halloween. SWMBO sits inside and listens to the various screams and is absolutely convinced that I am going to be responsible for a complete generation of axe murderers coming from our neighborhood. I haven’t been assaulted by any of the kids yet, but my record to date is one kid that took one look at the Incarnation of Death and took off screaming down the block. The grass was scorched behind him and his mother didn’t catch him for four houses. I’m going for five this year :eek: ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2004, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/48 "2004-10-18T00:58:41Z")
It’s that time of year again, **welby** …is your cup ready to go? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2006, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/49 "2006-10-27T21:38:33Z")
I hope you’re planning on having nuts-in-a-cup this year? The _safest_ Halloween treat 😛 Seems like a zombie thread is appropriate for this subject. ---
**Author:** ![Gangster\_Octopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a8b319/32.png) [@Gangster\_Octopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gangster_Octopus)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2006, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/50 "2006-10-27T21:51:52Z")
In my head as play this scene out, you are played by Will Ferrel, your wife is played by Jenna Fischer. It is a very funny scene. ---
**Author:** ![Harmonious\_Discord](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/74df32/32.png) [@Harmonious\_Discord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Harmonious_Discord)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2006, 10:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/51 "2006-10-27T22:36:23Z")
[QUOTE=Clothahump] ROTFLMAO! That’s absolutely great. I always try to scare the snot out of the kiddies at Halloween. SWMBO sits inside and listens to the various screams and is absolutely convinced that I am going to be responsible for a complete generation of axe murderers coming from our neighborhood. I haven’t been assaulted by any of the kids yet, but my record to date is one kid that took one look at the Incarnation of Death and took off screaming down the block. The grass was scorched behind him and his mother didn’t catch him for four houses. I’m going for five this year :eek: [/QUOTE] The axe murders are the ones that don’t screem and run. ---
**Author:** ![a35362](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/3da27b/32.png) [@a35362](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/a35362)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2012, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/52 "2012-10-27T05:33:38Z")
Just wanted to bump this old zombie to share once again. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Mondegreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/91b2a8/32.png) [@Lord\_Mondegreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Mondegreen)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2012, 11:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/53 "2012-10-27T11:20:14Z")
> [@welby](#): > > … thier … thier … thier … > [@El\_Elvis\_Rojo](#): > > … nieghborhood … My zombie head just exploded. The “i” before “e” except after “c” guideline is not a rule. ---
**Author:** ![voltaire](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voltaire/32/313_2.png) [@voltaire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voltaire)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2012, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/54 "2012-10-27T11:53:43Z")
> [@Lord\_Mondegreen](#): > > > [@welby](#): > > > > … thier … thier … thier … > > My zombie head just exploded. > > The “i” before “e” except after “c” guideline is not a rule. Well, if you’re gonna nitpick spelling on a decade old post, at least be thorough. This one should make your zombie head _assplode_: > [@welby](#): > > feinds. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [October 27, 2012, 2:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/55 "2012-10-27T14:23:18Z")
I never got to see this post, so I am quite pleased with thi particular zombie. And I can’t stop laughing. :p:p So, I wonder if it’s too late for a threadspotting? I mean, it’s only been a decade 😃 Or perhaps there’s a ‘Thread of threads’ to hang this one in. ---
**Author:** ![rocking\_chair](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rocking_chair/32/2918_2.png) [@rocking\_chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rocking_chair)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2012, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/56 "2012-10-28T22:57:44Z")
i just mentioned this story to a coworker on friday. ahhhh, good times. ---
**Author:** ![shantih](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f6c823/32.png) [@shantih](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/shantih)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2012, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/57 "2012-10-29T14:52:14Z")
> [@Lord\_Mondegreen](#): > > My zombie head just exploded. > > The “i” before “e” except after “c” guideline is not a rule. “I” before “e” except after “c” **Or when sounding like A as in “neighbor” or “weigh.”** Grammar police FTW! ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2012, 3:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/58 "2012-10-29T15:24:13Z")
> [@shantih](#): > > “I” before “e” except after “c” > **Or when sounding like A as in “neighbor” or “weigh.”** Or when dealing with words that are “weird” or “foreign.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2012, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/59 "2012-10-29T18:11:28Z")
We resurrect a zombie thread about halloween at halloween for _grammar nitpicks?_ I’m not sure if I should be proud of our pedantry or exasperated at our esotericness. ---
**Author:** ![Dogzilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@Dogzilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dogzilla)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2012, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832/60 "2012-10-29T18:12:02Z")
Next year, wear a cup. And a hockey mask. Those girls are gonna be ready for you, man! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/halloween-goes-horribly-wrong/134832.md?page=4)