# Ham, Bacon, Sausage, or Crispy Tofu Patties? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 25, 2017, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162 "2017-01-25T17:42:58Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/1 "2017-01-25T17:42:58Z")
Ummm, is that ham off the bone? Then, yes please. Otherwise, sausage. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/2 "2017-01-25T17:52:24Z")
Sausage, links and/or patties for me. ---
**Author:** ![pulykamell](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pulykamell/32/3166_2.png) [@pulykamell](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pulykamell)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/3 "2017-01-25T18:01:58Z")
Sausage. In fact, that was my breakfast. Just breakfast sausages and a slice of bread. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/4 "2017-01-25T18:07:00Z")
Oh, sausage, by all means! Unless I’m having a “breakfast sandwich” involving eggs, cheese, and a hard roll. Bacon seems more suitable on those. ---
**Author:** ![peedin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peedin/32/14095_2.png) [@peedin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/peedin)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/5 "2017-01-25T18:14:33Z")
Bacon. Second choice is sausage. ---
**Author:** ![Patx2](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/73ab20/32.png) [@Patx2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Patx2)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/6 "2017-01-25T18:21:33Z")
Bacon, crispy please! ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/7 "2017-01-25T18:42:33Z")
Pig. Definitely pig. After that I’m not picky. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/8 "2017-01-25T18:43:32Z")
All of the pork delicacies. No tofu, please. ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/9 "2017-01-25T18:43:58Z")
Bacon, unless I feel like some ham. Sometimes spam. Yes, I went there. ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/10 "2017-01-25T18:46:18Z")
Bacon. ---
**Author:** ![Azeotrope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/0ea827/32.png) [@Azeotrope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Azeotrope)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/11 "2017-01-25T18:49:12Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Bacon, unless I feel like some ham. Sometimes spam. Yes, I went there. Heck, I’m right there with ya. ---
**Author:** ![Quimby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/22d042/32.png) [@Quimby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Quimby)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/12 "2017-01-25T18:54:25Z")
I prefer sausage but in diners it can be hit or miss because sometimes the particular brand or variety they use doesn’t taste good to me so I tend to order bacon when out unless I know I like the sausage. Also, everyone from NJ will probably write in Pork Roll. ---
**Author:** ![teela\_brown](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d9b06d/32.png) [@teela\_brown](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teela_brown)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/13 "2017-01-25T19:20:16Z")
Ham, please. Like the OP, I like a real ham slice off the bone, and I like it fried until it’s a bit brown, and then topped with a poached egg. ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/14 "2017-01-25T19:24:24Z")
> [@Two\_Many\_Cats](#): > > Ummm, is that ham off the bone? Then, yes please. > > Otherwise, sausage. For breakfast? Bacon (not crispy) or sausage on the side, ham in an omelet. On my pizza? Sausage (and pepperoni). Never, ever ‘Crispy Tofu Patties’…hurts me to even have to type out let alone have to think about eating it. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/15 "2017-01-25T19:28:20Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Bacon, unless I feel like some ham. Sometimes spam. Yes, I went there. Oh no you dintit! Ham is lovely, bacon is lovely, tofu should be murdered, but there are all different flavors of sausage. I have pineapple sausage at home right now. It’s savory sausage with little chunks of pineapple in it. So it’s sweet and savory. It is awesome. So sausage wins it. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/16 "2017-01-25T19:43:07Z")
What, no option for scrapple? Ham varies widely in quality. Really good ham blow the others out of the water, and bad ham isn’t worth bothering with. So I’d first need to know how good the ham is. Assuming the ham is nothing special, then my preference is probably for a mix of sausage and bacon. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/17 "2017-01-25T19:49:55Z")
My breakfast for the entire time I was in Vietnam was a sausage link sandwich and a quart of chocolate milk. ---
**Author:** ![Kron](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kron/32/12444_2.png) [@Kron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kron)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/18 "2017-01-25T19:54:40Z")
I used to be a bacon guy, but in the last few years my go-to breakfast meat is now sausage (if I’m eating out, still do bacon generally at home). I agree with Chronos though- if I know the ham is of good quality, I will pick it every time. ---
**Author:** ![Dr\_Paprika](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr_paprika/32/3042_2.png) [@Dr\_Paprika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr_Paprika)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/19 "2017-01-25T20:16:53Z")
Bacon, unless the ham is really good quality. Rarely is. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2017, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162/20 "2017-01-25T20:58:24Z")
I like all of them, though I have also had seitan ‘ham’ and ‘bacon’ that were quite tasty. I will actually fry up sliced pressed firm tofu in leftover bacon fat =) it absorbs the flavors quite well [though it is sort of compromising the food for my vegan and vegetarian friends, but I do it for me to eat =) I also like to make tofu scrambled eggs in leftover bacon fat.] [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ham-bacon-sausage-or-crispy-tofu-patties/778162.md?page=2)