# Hand kissing - suave or stupid? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [June 16, 2003, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119 "2003-06-16T01:48:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Improv\_Geek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b3f665/32.png) [@Improv\_Geek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Improv_Geek)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 1:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/1 "2003-06-16T01:48:50Z")
So I have had minor success with said action. I of course follow the “proper” etiquette to let the lady offer her hand, usually for a handshake, which I instead take as an offer to kiss her hand. Now please know I do not use this for any business or at any time when I am not welcome to flirt. So I guess, Girls - if pulled off correctly does this come across as suave or corny? Guys - any success stories? ---
**Author:** ![Creaky](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e68b1a/32.png) [@Creaky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Creaky)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/2 "2003-06-16T01:56:10Z")
Frankly, at any time, I think it’s corny, but that’s just my opinion. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/3 "2003-06-16T02:04:37Z")
I suppose if you’re one of the last of the Romanovs, or descendant of the Tsar, or a pretender to the throne of China, it could be considered suave. I used to work for an older guy who tried to pull this off. Occasionally women fluttered and cooed, but for the most part they reacted with repugnance. As did I. Are you doing it “ironically” ? THAT might work in impressing the chicks. Although it is SO 1987. ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/4 "2003-06-16T02:04:42Z")
Ewwwww. I’d hate that. JMHO. ---
**Author:** ![Adoptamom\_II](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/7ba0ec/32.png) [@Adoptamom\_II](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Adoptamom_II)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/5 "2003-06-16T02:07:37Z")
I think it’s sweet, charming and likely to make a nice memory for the gal if you’re able to pull it off with style. Do not leave a trace of saliva though - that would just be gross. ---
**Author:** ![beegirl13](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/848f3c/32.png) [@beegirl13](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/beegirl13)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/6 "2003-06-16T02:10:07Z")
Never having experienced it, I don’t know what I’d think about the hand kiss as a substitution for a handshake. It seems suave when watching it in the movies and on TV, but in real life, it’s kind of iffy. I do think it’s really cute when my BF kisses my hand in the middle of hand-holding, though. ---
**Author:** ![Blonde](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Blonde](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blonde)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/7 "2003-06-16T02:10:47Z")
No, no. I envision Christopher Walken in the SNL skits!! ---
**Author:** ![lorinada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5e925/32.png) [@lorinada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorinada)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/8 "2003-06-16T02:19:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Blonde \* > \*\*No, no. > > I envision Christopher Walken in the SNL skits!! \*\* Exactly! To me, it’s just creepy. A kiss is still a kiss, no matter where it’s planted. Putting in on the hand as opposed to the lips makes it only slightly less intimate a gesture, IMHO. ---
**Author:** ![BuckleberryFerry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5f9b8f/32.png) [@BuckleberryFerry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BuckleberryFerry)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/9 "2003-06-16T02:21:37Z")
I think it’s just about the sweetest thing ever. Of course, I intend to marry the first person that _asks permission_ to kiss me on the lips. ::mournful sigh:: Romance is dead. ---
**Author:** ![j\_kat\_251](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/71c47a/32.png) [@j\_kat\_251](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j_kat_251)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/10 "2003-06-16T02:37:40Z")
> [@](#): > > Of course, I intend to marry the first person that asks permission to kiss me on the lips. DURRRR CAN I KISS YOU? Indeed, how romantic. ---
**Author:** ![LolaCocaCola](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7cd45c/32.png) [@LolaCocaCola](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LolaCocaCola)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/11 "2003-06-16T02:45:40Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Blonde \* > \*\*No, no. > > I envision Christopher Walken in the SNL skits!! \*\* Hahahaha The _Continental_. ---
**Author:** ![Turbo\_Dog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ce73a5/32.png) [@Turbo\_Dog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Turbo_Dog)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 3:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/12 "2003-06-16T03:00:39Z")
**Adoptamom\_II** nailed it. It isn’t the act, it is how and where it is presented. Style is everything. If you are a “the pleasure is mine, how do you do” kind of guy, you’ll get away with it, mainly because you’ll know when and with who it is appropriate. If you are a “yeah baby, how YOU doin” kind of guy, forget it. You’ll get the eye roll and disgusted grunt/sigh that only a woman can do. You know what kind of guy you are, and believe me, so will all but the most thick of girls. Kissing a hand can be incredibly good form at the right time, in the right place, in the right setting. In the local honkey tonk, just offer to buy the gal a drink. Overclassing can be just as bad as underclassing. One of my mottos is: Fashion goes in and out of style. Style never goes out of fashion. Women can sniff out a guy who hand kisses (or buys her a drink for that matter) in a second. If hand kissing is your nature, you’ll know. If it isn’t, don’t do it. ---
**Author:** ![BadBaby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/71c47a/32.png) [@BadBaby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BadBaby)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 3:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/13 "2003-06-16T03:01:17Z")
If done with humor, kinda cute. Otherwise it’s sort of a sad affectation. According to the big book o’ etiquette that dear Aunt Goldie gave me, you’re not actually supposed to touch her hand with your lips. There’s other rules, but I forget… ---
**Author:** ![BoBettie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/4af34b/32.png) [@BoBettie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BoBettie)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 3:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/14 "2003-06-16T03:08:04Z")
I LOATHE it. It gives me serious creeps, because only very creepy men have ever done it to me. (I’m talking someone I just met or that approaches me out somewhere). Ick. I’d shake hands instead and maybe put your other hand over hers, know what I mean? ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/15 "2003-06-16T03:40:26Z")
Hand kissing is not something I normally do, but… I’ve got this buddy, divorced, who is quite ordinary in every way. He has a good job but he’s not rich, etc., etc. So I ran into him in a mall the other day, and he says: “Hang on a second, I want you to meet my fiancee.” The woman shows up, and she is this totally elegant, entirely beautiful and _amazing_ looking person! He introduced us, and without thinking, when she stuck her hand out to shake I kissed it! I don’t know why I did that. It wasn’t something I did on purpose, it was more like a reflex action. She seemed OK with it, and we parted ways. Since then I’ve been puzzled about why I kissed her hand instead of just shaking it. Maybe something to do with the shock of Good Old Jim landing such a regal woman. _Still scratching head_ ---
**Author:** ![Mirror\_Image\_egamI\_rorriM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e56c9b/32.png) [@Mirror\_Image\_egamI\_rorriM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mirror_Image_egamI_rorriM)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/16 "2003-06-16T03:53:12Z")
If I was meeting you for the first time, I’d probably think you were some kind of weirdo, especially if it was in a professional setting. ---
**Author:** ![Daikona](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/8baadc/32.png) [@Daikona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daikona)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/17 "2003-06-16T04:23:01Z")
Corny, and a little on the creepy side. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiesnix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/898d66/32.png) [@Pixiesnix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiesnix)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/18 "2003-06-16T04:28:27Z")
To me, kissing any part of the body is a sign of deep familiarity and trust. It’s reserved for partners and family members. I never understood why some people kiss each other as a casual greeting. I mean, it’s fine if they’re comfortable with it, but I never saw the appeal. Why plant your lips on someone when a pleasant verbal greeting or handshake will do? DISCLAIMER: I am not criticizing those who engage in kiss-greetings. I am just my expressing my own personal discomfort with it. ---
**Author:** ![SnoopyFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d07c76/32.png) [@SnoopyFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnoopyFan)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 5:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/19 "2003-06-16T05:32:25Z")
Ubercharming 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Angel\_of\_the\_Lord](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/angel_of_the_lord/32/2949_2.png) [@Angel\_of\_the\_Lord](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angel_of_the_Lord)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2003, 5:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119/20 "2003-06-16T05:40:53Z")
This was the first move my now-fiance made on me. Of course, he was in-character in a LARP at the time, but it was an actual hand-kiss, not a pantomime. Obviously, it worked pretty well. . . 😃 Of course, he’s in the SCA, so he knows how to do the hand-kissing right. Plus I like having my hand kissed. I don’t think it’s corny, though; guess I’m just old-fashioned [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-kissing-suave-or-stupid/182119.md?page=2)