# Hand shaking likes and dislikes.

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-shaking-likes-and-dislikes/358957>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [June 1, 2006, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-shaking-likes-and-dislikes/358957 "2006-06-01T00:07:04Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 2

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**Author:** ![mhendo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mhendo/32/3159_2.png) [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)\
**Post date:** [June 1, 2006, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-shaking-likes-and-dislikes/358957/21 "2006-06-01T17:27:16Z")

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[QUOTE=Trunk]  
A dislike: a guy once shook my hand and “turned it over” so that the back of his hand was facing up.

If you have to exert your alpha status by “winning” a handshake, it’s too late; you’ve already lost.  
[/QUOTE]  
Yeah, that’s one of my pet hates, too. I knew a guy who used to do that, and was very explicit about the fact that he felt it gave him some sort of upper hand (literally and figuratively) in the encounter. Complete idiocy.

I also dislike the limp dishrag handshake. A nice firm grip—whether you’re shaking with a man or a woman—is what i like.

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**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\
**Post date:** [June 1, 2006, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-shaking-likes-and-dislikes/358957/22 "2006-06-01T18:30:28Z")

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[QUOTE=Canadjun]  
I’m not a person that’s into physical contact (I **HATE** with a passion being patted on the shoulder, which occasionally happens since I’m in a wheelchair), so I never offer to shake hands, but if anyone sticks their hand out to be shaken I will shake their whole hand firmly; if the person looks like someone that’s into forceful handshakes then I’m forceful too.

I’ve once or twice made arthritic old folk wince at church when they’ve shaken my hand and I’ve forgotten to be gentle. :eek:  
[/QUOTE]

Ah an old secret I remember from way back. People in non-electric wheelchairs have extremely strong hands and arms. Had a friend in junior school who was wheelchair bound, he was ruler of any arm wrestling match.

I find the use of the second hand good when you want to be warm and sincere, or when it will change into a hug, but also with someone you don’t trust at all. The reason for the final one is it gives an air of sincerity that your lack of trust may otherwise show through, and two it makes it very possible to throw or break the arm of that person. So should a bully try to get you to shake hands in a threatening situation it works quite well.

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**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\
**Post date:** [June 1, 2006, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hand-shaking-likes-and-dislikes/358957/23 "2006-06-01T19:01:24Z")

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I try to give a medium-firm handshake. I usually _get_ either the bone-crusher (hurts even more when you have arthritis, tendonitis, and several rings on your fingers) or the limp dishrag (just plain insulting) from men. Women who do shake my hand seem to usually get it right.

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