# Happy Festivus, Straight Dopers! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 23, 2019, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300 "2019-12-23T17:51:01Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/1 "2019-12-23T17:51:01Z")
Today, December 23, is Festivus, a day to reject the excesses of the holiday season. \*'Twas the night before Festivus and all through Queens, Not a Costanza was yelling…as strange as it seems. The family was sleeping, just waiting for light. Saving their strength for the upcoming fight. At the crack of dawn on December twenty-three, Frank put up the pole… instead of a tree. Estelle prepared the meal that would start the rite, Not a laugh or a smile was anywhere in sight. George dreaded this hour that came every year, The airing of grievances would soon be here. Frank stood at the table and bellowed outloud, “So who’s got a complaint amongst this crowd?” “You two are crazy and have wrecked my life!”, Cried George at his parents who mocked him for spite. "A Lloyd Braun you’ll never be " was Estelle’s refrain, “Why should I try,ma?.. the guy’s insane!” “Enough with the grievances,” Frank said with some glee, “Now which one of you two is wrestling me?” "So feats of strength you want? Let them begin here, “It’s your turn to fight him, mom… he beat me last year.” The battle was started, the screaming was lyrical, The fact no one got hurt was … ANOTHER FESTIVUS MIRACLE!!!\* May your day be filled with grievances and feats of strength. ---
**Author:** ![Treppenwitz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treppenwitz/32/3445_2.png) [@Treppenwitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treppenwitz)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/2 "2019-12-23T19:11:54Z")
Damn, I had forgotten - thank you for reminding me of this! j ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/3 "2019-12-23T19:22:08Z")
That was an amazing poem **cochrane**. [The Story of Festivus](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HX55AzGku5Y) “I find tinsel distracting.” ---
**Author:** ![Sunny\_Daze](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunny_daze/32/438_2.png) [@Sunny\_Daze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunny_Daze)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 7:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/4 "2019-12-23T19:27:10Z")
😃 Festivus for the rest of us! ---
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 7:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/5 "2019-12-23T19:51:08Z")
When does the “Airing of Grievances” start? ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/6 "2019-12-23T20:05:39Z")
“I got a lot of problems with you people!” ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/7 "2019-12-23T20:07:31Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > When does the “Airing of Grievances” start? _I have a big problem with you people!_ ninja’d ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 9:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/8 "2019-12-23T21:00:45Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > That was an amazing poem **cochrane**. > > [The Story of Festivus](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HX55AzGku5Y) > > “I find tinsel distracting.” I can’t take credit for it. I found it online and copied it. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2019, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-festivus-straight-dopers/845300/9 "2019-12-23T21:02:18Z")
> [@Slash1972](#): > > When does the “Airing of Grievances” start? 24 hours a day, in the BBQ Pit. 😃