# Happy New Rants!! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [January 1, 2018, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683 "2018-01-01T11:12:19Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/141 "2018-01-09T18:47:50Z")
I can’t honestly say that Malt Vinegar would be any worse than those poor troglodytes that put MAYONNAISE on their fries. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/142 "2018-01-09T19:02:51Z")
Is there something about air dispensers at gas stations that turn people into morons, or are idiots especially attracted to them? My preferred air outlet (it’s free!) is designed so that air flows only when you insert the nozzle into the tire valve and depress the handle. Naturally, someone had to yell at me while I was moving to another tire, to let me know that the machine had stopped pumping air. Sunday I had to make a pit stop at another place since the first joint’s air machine was out of commission due to the cold (?). At this place you had to put $1 in to trigger four minutes worth of air, resulting in a frenzied scramble to get to all four tires before the air ran out. The dork in the nerdy winter hat with furry earflaps using the machine ahead of me (I’ll call him DINWH for short) finished up his air capades and left with the machine still running, which gave me about 15 seconds of “free” air to start with. As I’m beginning to use it, I hear someone yelling at me, which I initially ignore as there’s no reason for me to be yelled at. The yelling continues, so I look over to see DINWH in his car nearby, yelling something unintelligible. I put my hand to my ear to indicate that I can’t hear him over the noise and turn back to the air machine, which has now run out. DINWH pulls up a couple feet away to tell me that I didn’t have to put any money in the machine since it still had air left, and sarcastically said “You’re welcome!”. What a maroon. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/143 "2018-01-09T19:48:28Z")
Malt vinegar is DELICIOUS. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/144 "2018-01-09T20:08:42Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > I can’t honestly say that Malt Vinegar would be any worse than those poor troglodytes that put MAYONNAISE on their fries. ☹ I know someone who uses mayo on chicken nuggets and fries. ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/145 "2018-01-09T20:12:15Z")
> [@raventhief](#): > > Malt vinegar is DELICIOUS. I agree. Here in Texas I have to beg for it if I eat fish and chips, and sometimes even then don’t get any. However, Texas seems to think the only thing to put on any fish is tartar sauce (ick) as I have to beg for lemon for my fish as well. I wonder if malt vinegar is like cilantro in that it smells differently for genetic reasons. Because it smells nothing like cat shit or old sneakers to me. I also wonder if other kinds of vinegar smell that way to those folks. And what about pickles? ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/146 "2018-01-09T20:23:55Z")
I know someone who dips French fries in a vanilla shake. Weird. I like malt vinegar at a fish place. But it is all hot sauce around here. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/147 "2018-01-09T20:28:24Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I know someone who dips French fries in a vanilla shake. Weird. I like malt vinegar at a fish place. But it is all hot sauce around here. When we go have the $5 or $6 lunch at Dairy Queen, my 80 year old mother dips them in the sundae that comes with the meal. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/148 "2018-01-09T20:47:25Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > I can’t honestly say that Malt Vinegar would be any worse than those poor troglodytes that put MAYONNAISE on their fries. ☹ Now that’s just nasty. Though I have been known to dip my fries in the blue cheese dressing at Wingstop rather than my wings. Also. Malt vinegar is great. Also also. Hearing ‘Malt Vinegar’ always reminds me of the [Vinegar Boy Saga.](http://www.customerssuck.com/board/showthread.php?t=166) ---
**Author:** ![Ann\_Hedonia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ann_hedonia/32/319_2.png) [@Ann\_Hedonia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ann_Hedonia)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 10:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/149 "2018-01-09T22:24:18Z")
> [@raventhief](#): > > I know someone who uses mayo on chicken nuggets and fries. Oh, I love mayo on fries! Usually for chicken nuggets ( and similar dippable food ) I whip up a little sauce of some sort using some off the cuff combination of mayo,various salad dressings, mustards, ketchup, salsa and barbecue sauce. It’s never the same twice. But unless I’ve used ranch or blue cheese dressing there’s usually mayo in there. ---
**Author:** ![FatBaldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecd19e/32.png) [@FatBaldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FatBaldGuy)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/150 "2018-01-09T22:25:41Z")
In Utah we have a concoction called “Fry Sauce”. It was invented years ago by a regional chain called “Arctic Circle” and has become very popular at local fast food places. Essentially it’s made of equal parts of ketchup and mayonnaise. It may not sound too great, but don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. ---
**Author:** ![Folacin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/folacin/32/3195_2.png) [@Folacin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Folacin)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/151 "2018-01-09T22:34:10Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I know someone who dips French fries in a vanilla shake. Weird. I like malt vinegar at a fish place. But it is all hot sauce around here. That’s just wrong. Fries are only dipped into \*\*\*chocolate \*\*\*shakes. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 10:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/152 "2018-01-09T22:41:28Z")
> [@FatBaldGuy](#): > > In Utah we have a concoction called “Fry Sauce”. It was invented years ago by a regional chain called “Arctic Circle” and has become very popular at local fast food places. > > Essentially it’s made of equal parts of ketchup and mayonnaise. It may not sound too great, but don’t knock it until you’ve tried it. Isn’t that basically what Thousand Island dressing is with some relish thrown in? ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/153 "2018-01-09T23:00:35Z")
Well, the lil’wrekker goes back to University tomarrow. I don’t think it will be as hard to see her go this time. At least I hope not. She has run me ragged for a month. Everything is ready, all she had to do is drive off. And I can go to bed for a week. I have no plans looming. I am still working the b-ball games. But I think we are about done with that. No one is going into play offs around here. That a plus ( to me ). Free at last! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2018, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/154 "2018-01-09T23:37:59Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > Well, the lil’wrekker goes back to University tomarrow. I don’t think it will be as hard to see her go this time. At least I hope not. She has run me ragged for a month. Everything is ready, all she had to do is drive off. And I can go to bed for a week… Free at last! Thank God Almighty, you free at last! We became empty nesters unexpectedly when our daughter left for college and our son took off from high school to be a gypsy filmmaker… And I am getting SO much more sleep! The wife was always sleeping fine, but I’d half sleep til both kids were home (2-ish), and then get up at 6… yawn. And as to the most important topic on these boards: Fries are bland enough that I decree that anyone can put anything they want on them. We have a Canuck place that does great poutine. At the local tavern, we get a mound of crispy fries and I’m often asked to “construct a concoction”. Mostly A1 Steak Sauce with mayo and ketchup. Someday I’m going to smuggle in some HP Sauce… ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2018, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/155 "2018-01-10T00:05:39Z")
> [@Folacin](#): > > That’s just wrong. Fries are only dipped into \*\*\*chocolate \*\*\*shakes. Thinking of self… 1. Likes pineapple on pizza 2. loves blue cheese dressing 3. totally understands the fries-in-shakes thing Where does this leave me? * * * I’m just having one of those days where everything I write looks like shit. It happens and I’m fairly used to it, but I’m trying to push through revisions on my novel (five chapters to go, maybe?) and this is not a great time to have a ''Why do I even bother?" crisls. ---
**Author:** ![Catamount](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/catamount/32/2840_2.png) [@Catamount](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Catamount)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2018, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/156 "2018-01-10T00:07:26Z")
I tend to put ranch dressing on my fries these days but I may switch back to malt vinegar after this conversation. Better than ketchup! ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2018, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/157 "2018-01-10T00:25:31Z")
I like fries. Alot. I am hungry. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2018, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/158 "2018-01-10T01:44:34Z")
Eh, my favorite pizza is Godfather’s Taco Pizza, which has lettuce on it. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2018, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/159 "2018-01-10T02:19:23Z")
> [@Folacin](#): > > You put vinegar on your pizza? I’d think even the English would draw that line . . . The Scottish don’t. Or at least one of my Scottish coworkers didn’t, but he was generally icky; we didn’t take a poll to see what the rest of the locals thought about his eating habits. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [January 10, 2018, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683/160 "2018-01-10T02:27:29Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Wasn’t it 12 plagues? 10, just to screw with everybody. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-new-rants/805683.md?page=9)