# Happy Thanksgiving! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 24, 1999, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480 "1999-11-24T19:26:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Imthecowgodmoo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Imthecowgodmoo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Imthecowgodmoo)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 1999, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/1 "1999-11-24T19:26:00Z")
Imthecowgodmoo has sent you an egreetings® card! ## To view your greeting, simply click the following Web address any time over the next three weeks: [http://www.egreetings.com/v/epdaf33QJ9](http://www.egreetings.com/v/epdaf33QJ9) “I may be crazy, but at least I’m not as crazy as you.”-- Calvin and Hobbes (\_\_) `\/-------\ `| |-----| | …c.c…c.c… ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 1999, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/2 "1999-11-24T20:58:00Z")
He laid her on the table, So white, so clean and bare. His forehead wet with beads of sweat, He rubbed her here and there. He touched her neck and then her breast, Then, drooling, felt her thigh. The slit was wet and all was set, He gave a joyous cry. The hole was wide…he looked inside, All was dark and murky. He rubbed his hands, stretched out his arms, And then he stuffed the turkey. Happy Thanksgiving all. * * * **Dopeler effect:** The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly. ---
**Author:** ![Demo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/demo/32/8472_2.png) [@Demo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Demo)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 1999, 10:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/3 "1999-11-24T22:02:00Z")
Thanks CowGod, LOL UncleBeer. Same to you and all ye Dopers out there. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 1999, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/4 "1999-11-24T22:03:00Z")
Happy turkey to all(except the vegetarians,happy tofurkey) and happy birthday to phil,old broad,and me!(i’m gonna pig out) * * * if you can read this,you are too close ---
**Author:** ![TVeblen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4bbf92/32.png) [@TVeblen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TVeblen)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 1999, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/5 "1999-11-24T22:51:00Z")
(shyly flicking away a sentimental tear} Oh, this is just so precious of you guys. UncleBeer, your quite…uh, moving poetic greeting just made me _sooooo_ much more thankful that I’m celebrating with customary festive lasagne. (Watch out for those TTD’s, folks: Turky Transmitted Diseases. Poultry is more toxic than swimming buck nekkid in the cooling tanks of a nuclear power plant. Ask Chef Troy. He’s the pro. Hell, the man can make killer pork rinds on the fly!) May your day be filled with peace and plenty. \*if you can sleep tonight without fear, you’re blessed. \*if you can see, stand, and live in health, you’re blessed. \*if you can read, think your mind and speak it, you’re blessed. \*if you have enough to eat, and enough to share, you’re blessed. \*if you have work you care about, you’re blessed. \*if you own enough of yourself to share with others, you’re blessed. \*if you have people–even “strangers” like here–as friends, you’re blessed. I’m blessed in so many ways I’ve done nothing to earn. That’s why this holiday is so great. It’s time (and past time!) to say a simple “thank you” for all the things taken for granted. So thanks, you guys! You’ve been a bright spot in a dark year. Have a great one! And if you _do_ have a turkey tomorrow, do not, NOT, recall that sicko poem above! Or at least have an excellent excuse for your uncouth laughter when the family and in-laws ask you to explain. Off to stir the sauce (chortle!), Veb ---
**Author:** ![Rysdad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/7cd45c/32.png) [@Rysdad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rysdad)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 1999, 12:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/6 "1999-11-25T00:11:00Z")
I’d also like to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Leftovers. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 1999, 12:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/7 "1999-11-25T00:23:00Z")
May the Lions be valiant over da Bears and may there by no leftovers. I’ll be signing off for over a week for my fun filled trip to England. I expect a full report of any tomfoolery and shananigans that go on here whilst I’m away. Happy early birthday, Phil. ---
**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 1999, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/8 "1999-11-25T00:50:00Z")
Wow. Three birthdays, **and** shitloads of turkey! Woohooo! Happy Thanksgiving! * * * You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing. ---
**Author:** ![Zyada](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zyada/32/3028_2.png) [@Zyada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zyada)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 1999, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/happy-thanksgiving/11480/9 "1999-11-25T04:15:00Z")
Happy Thanksgiving all! We’re having our tradional Spanish Spareribs and Rice.