# Hard-to-believe slogans **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 5, 2001, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049 "2001-08-05T23:38:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Myron\_Van\_Horowitzski](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de053/32.png) [@Myron\_Van\_Horowitzski](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myron_Van_Horowitzski)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2001, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/61 "2001-08-16T14:57:31Z")
In my hometown there are two septic service companies. The slogan for one is disgusting: **"We Deal In Used Food."** The other one is kind of clever: **"A Royal Flush Beats a Full House."** ---
**Author:** ![FlyingDragonFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/c89c15/32.png) [@FlyingDragonFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlyingDragonFan)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2001, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/62 "2001-08-16T15:58:58Z")
I don’t know if it’s still there, but Mesa, Arizona used to have a landscaping/sprinkler installation company whose slogan was: **Let Mesa Sprinkler put a bubbler in your bush.** ---
**Author:** ![Soup\_du\_jour](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Soup\_du\_jour](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soup_du_jour)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2001, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/63 "2001-08-16T16:00:02Z")
There’s an Auto Parts store near me that has this cyclical slogan. “If it’s in stock, we’ve got it!” How dumb. ---
**Author:** ![pestie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e5b9ba/32.png) [@pestie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pestie)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2001, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/64 "2001-08-16T19:36:01Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Myron Van Horowitzski \* > \*\*In my hometown there are two septic service companies. The slogan for one is disgusting: **"We Deal In Used Food."** > > The other one is kind of clever: **“A Royal Flush Beats a Full House.”** \*\* I’ve seen a septic service company whose motto was, “It smells like money to me.” ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2001, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/65 "2001-08-16T19:56:03Z")
Anyone remember when cigs were advertised heavily on TV? And the millimeter war started? And someone (I think Winston) had the slogan: “It’s not how long you make it, it’s how you make it long!” That’s worked for me ever since I was introduced to the exotic pleasures of the flesh 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![bughunter](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/aeb1de/32.png) [@bughunter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bughunter)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2001, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/66 "2001-08-16T19:58:53Z")
Here in Los Angeles County, on the 210 freeway in Irwindale there’s a billboard for some pop 40 radio station advertising its mandatory obnoxious morning DJs. Their slogan? “Less Painful Than Waxing” ---
**Author:** ![The\_Man\_Who](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c2a13f/32.png) [@The\_Man\_Who](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Man_Who)\ **Post date:** [August 16, 2001, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/67 "2001-08-16T21:19:03Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by waterj2 \* > \*\*And the packs still say L.S./M.F.T. on the bottom. I don’t see what’s so bad about it, though, they are fine tobacco. Well, Lucky Strike fans would think so, I guess. I bought a pack once (wanted to try unfiltered cigarettes, even though I rarely smoke) and they weren’t bad. Of course, I really don’t have much basis for comparison. \*\* Mad Magazine once advanced the theory that LSMFT meant “Lucky Strike makes fatal tumors.” -Myron ---
**Author:** ![Philosophocles](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@Philosophocles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Philosophocles)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/68 "2001-08-17T07:07:42Z")
Frank Perdue’s slogan on Mexican billboards: “It takes a hard man to arouse a chicken.” ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 8:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/69 "2001-08-17T08:24:31Z")
I liked the one used for an all-too-brief time by the Juan Valdez/Colombian Coffee folks: Grab Life by the Beans. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 10:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/70 "2001-08-17T10:02:52Z")
Apparently, A&P Supermarkets used in the 1970s, “We’re always working for your WHEEE-OH!” Apparently, their prices were so low, they’d make you shout “WHEEE-OH!” Are those ad writers on drugs or what? ---
**Author:** ![jesuslynch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e99b99/32.png) [@jesuslynch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jesuslynch)\ **Post date:** [August 17, 2001, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049/71 "2001-08-17T13:46:46Z")
There’s a muffler shop in Pine Bluff who’s slogan is, **No Muff Too Tuff**. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hard-to-believe-slogans/75049.md?page=3)