# Has it ever occurred to you how insane elementary school gym class was? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 27, 2023, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246 "2023-04-27T05:02:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![NinthAcolyte](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ninthacolyte/32/13676_2.png) [@NinthAcolyte](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NinthAcolyte)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/21 "2023-04-27T14:43:41Z")
> [@AHunter3](#): > > What I hated: gym teacher encouraging the jocks, then letting them run the class, dividing us into teams; gym teacher not freaking TEACHING us, so those of us who didn’t do sports were ridiculed and dumped on. YES! We learned the rules of the game, got split into teams, and then left to our own devices. So the unathletic stood around talking while the jocks played the actual game. And if it were something like badminton or volleyball where individual participation was more emphasized, we never got any actual _coaching_ from the so-called coah - if you sucked, you sucked. No feedback, suggestions for improvement, or actual structured _exercise_ regimen that might have better-prepared our bodies to perform well. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 2:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/22 "2023-04-27T14:49:52Z")
> [@Llama\_Llogophile](#): > > I actually taught something, and did it in a way that served everyone, not just the naturally athletic kids. Bless you! I wish I’d had you in Junior High instead of the borderline creepers we had. I mostly enjoyed gym class. I’d been the smallest kid in grade school, but that meant I learned to run (away from bullies) really fast. By 7th grade I was at least athletic enough to evade dodgeballs and climb that stupid rope. (WHAT was the point of that?!? Is this a skill we’ll use anywhere except climbing up to a treehouse in a jungle? And of course the sadistic teachers would bellow “ **NO** body goes to their next class until Roberta Chafethighs touches the ceiling!”) Anyhow, I canNOT get one scene out of my head. A kid had a big blister on his leg, and our two male gym teachers got him down on the floor, called us all over and proceeded to lance it, narrating how much pus was coming out and what color and texture it was. The teachers then spent the next ten minutes regaling us with pus stories, and they were so excited about one “surgery”: “Remember that ginger kid with the huge abscess? You could’ve filled your mouth with all the pus!” And now, I’m hoping that by having written that down, I can spend less time thinking about it… you’re welcome. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/23 "2023-04-27T14:54:41Z")
> [@George Bernard Shaw](#): > > Those who can, do. Those who can’t, teach. > [@](#): > > Those who can’t teach, teach gym. For some reason it’s not including the name for the second quote. Loathe though I am to quote him, the second part came from Woody Allen. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/24 "2023-04-27T14:54:46Z")
Most of my PE teachers were very fond of volleyball, probably because all they had to do was set up the net and throw us a ball. I hate volleyball. ---
**Author:** ![racer72](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/racer72/32/3075_2.png) [@racer72](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/racer72)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/25 "2023-04-27T14:59:41Z")
Never had PE or gym in elementary school. The first time was in 7th grade while in junior high. Having to get undressed in front of everyone else and wearing a jock strap. Then at the end of class taking a shower and drying off with a large paper towel. By Friday our gym clothes would reek. More than once I remember throwing my stinky gym clothes in the washer on Sunday night, wearing stinky clothes on Monday meant running laps outside no matter the weather. ---
**Author:** ![Llama\_Llogophile](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@Llama\_Llogophile](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Llama_Llogophile)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/26 "2023-04-27T15:01:10Z")
> [@NinthAcolyte](#): > > The “three weeks of a different team sport followed by general physical fitness tests (8-minute mile was an “A”) at the end of the year” did nothing to increase my actual fitness… Here’s the thing… According to research at the time I was trained and then teaching (which is now over 15 years ago), even a well structured PE program would not result in fitness gains. Some context… There’s no standardization to how often kids go to PE class, or in some states, if they have it at all. Let’s say twice a week for 35 minutes is typical. That amount of time, even if it was completely filled with activity isn’t enough to make meaningful fitness gains. Then there are the type of fitness gains. Cardio? Strength? Balance and coordination? And then there’s the fact that everyone goes in at a different starting point. But in my mind that was fine. It was Physical Edcuation, not personal training. I always felt the goal was to expose kids to a lot of different skills, try to achieve some very basic mastery, introduce them to the idea of fitness and how one achieves it and most importantly… HAVE FUN DOING IT. This is where the field as a whole has largely failed, I think. The idea is get kids to enjoy physical activity, so they want to continue doing it as they grow, for their whole lives. By subjecting kids to all kinds of unpleasantness, indifferent teachers, focusing on activities that favor the already athletic, it has largely achieved the opposite. But as I say, it can be done well. And to be sure, there are places and people where PE is being taught really well. But I’d say those are small islets in the ocean, unfortunately. Maybe things have improved since I left - I certainly hope so. ---
**Author:** ![Saint\_Cad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saint_cad/32/18907_2.png) [@Saint\_Cad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saint_Cad)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/27 "2023-04-27T15:06:50Z")
As one of the more athletic students in elementary school, gym was glorious. If you were not athletic, I imagine it was hell-on-earth. But of course we had to play smear-the-queer (imagine calling it that today! more insanity from 1970s schools) at recess because that was too violent even for gym class, although the teachers supervising us never stopped us. ---
**Author:** ![sciurophobic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/cab0a1/32.png) [@sciurophobic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sciurophobic)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/28 "2023-04-27T15:07:22Z")
I loved dodgeball. It’s the only sport where the object is to run away from the ball. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/29 "2023-04-27T15:10:56Z")
We got exposed to some sports for a few weeks each. Not a bad idea, if you want to see where a kid might have some interest. A little basketball, a little volleyball, a little baseball. Maybe some wrestling. I was terrible at everything, but I guess I’m glad I learned the basics. My locker room horror story. Someone decided it would be a good idea to put in a locker room and showers for 5th and 6th graders at my elementary school (old style, group showers). I still recall how horrified I was at the idea. I will say, after a week or two, it was no longer a big deal and perhaps saved me the fear of a high school locker room years later. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/30 "2023-04-27T15:18:52Z")
Middle school (grades 7-9) Gym class was much as others have described here. One of our gym teachers was so inept he used to stand by the gym doors and smoke while making us run laps for the entire class. He once threw his keys at a kid and hit me in the leg with his shitty aim. Cut my leg - blood flowing down. I went to leave the class. “Where are you going?” he yelled. “To the nurse and then to the principal” was my reply. He didn’t last the year. We did have showers in our change room. They were never used. By anyone. Ever. Nobody got naked in that room. Ever. It was a mutually agreed thing, and no gym teacher ever told us we had to shower. We were all stinky. A few friends and I had a plan that if the new teacher told us to shower, we’d report to our parents that “Mr. so and so wants to see us all naked for some reason.” ---
**Author:** ![wguy123](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wguy123/32/3161_2.png) [@wguy123](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wguy123)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/31 "2023-04-27T15:26:15Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > I remember an annual event using little wheeled scooters. It was just a 12"x12" square plastic board with 4 casters on the bottom and handles on the sides. What the hell was that anyways? We had that too. I just did some searching and found they are called scooter boards. Ours were all stacked on one that had a pole sticking up, similar to the image below, but much older since this would’ve been the 70s. I remember we had races and it was just pretty chaotic overall. Other than that, we had all the classics of dodge ball, kick ball, tether ball, four square ball, and rope climbing. We had another ball game that I haven’t seen mentioned here: War ball. That was 1 kid against a bunch standing against a wall. You used the same smaller dodge ball ball and tried to eliminate every kid by hitting them until there was one left standing. If someone caught the ball, your time was up. This had the added complexity that you could bounce the ball off the wall. [![](https://static.bsnsports.com/media/catalog/product/cache/3/image/330380c30dd28feb1c15773803c8d332/pe_mssbrack_a_x.jpg) ](https://static.bsnsports.com/media/catalog/product/cache/3/image/330380c30dd28feb1c15773803c8d332/pe_mssbrack_a_x.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![FlikTheBlue](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fliktheblue/32/10972_2.png) [@FlikTheBlue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FlikTheBlue)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/32 "2023-04-27T15:38:58Z")
I was short and skinny back in those days, so I hated most of the activities and sports. Running, jumping jacks, kickball, stretching, they all sucked. But being short and skinny has some advantages, especially for dodge ball. I was the best dodge ball player at my elementary school, and so it was my favorite sport back then. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/33 "2023-04-27T15:44:17Z")
Yeah. I remember those. Ours where wooden. Nobody ever figured out a good way to stack or store them. I donno what the hell we did with them. But it’s a sure fire way to break fingers. ---
**Author:** ![enipla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/54ee81/32.png) [@enipla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/enipla)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/34 "2023-04-27T15:50:26Z")
My cousin living in Denver graduated high-school early. Scholastic achievements. She went to Manhattan to visit her sister for a few months. Great learning experience. BUT the powers that be decided that she could not graduate on her achievements, she did not have enough P.E. credits. They wanted her to take the subway to Brooklyn to take P.E. classes at a local school. I’m pretty sure she got out of it. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/35 "2023-04-27T15:58:02Z")
My gym teacher in junior high was a sadistic S.O.B. who believed in “Do it until it hurts”. Calisthenics outside in gym shorts and t-shirts in the middle of winter, dodge ball, and an end-of-class 1/4 mile lap where the last one in had to run 2 extra laps which meant that every single day someone got to be late for their next class. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 4:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/36 "2023-04-27T16:13:57Z")
> [@AHunter3](#): > > b) What I hated: gym teacher encouraging the jocks, then letting them run the class, dividing us into teams; gym teacher not freaking TEACHING us, so those of us who didn’t do sports were ridiculed and dumped on. I hope this may give you and others an idea of what it was like for the dumb jocks in regular classes being called on to answer a question they obviously didn’t know the answer to while the brainiacs joyfully waved their arms in the air hoping to be called on. And this has to be the worst possible way for people to understand what it’s like for others in these situations since I rarely find anyone who figured it out. Doesn’t help that the teachers didn’t get it either. ---
**Author:** ![jnglmassiv](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f07891/32.png) [@jnglmassiv](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jnglmassiv)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/37 "2023-04-27T18:38:54Z")
> [@DCnDC](#): > > It was just a 12"x12" square plastic board with 4 casters on the bottom and handles on the sides. What the hell was that anyways? Yea, we had those. Besides races, we also played scooter hockey. It’s exactly the same as floor hockey only you had to stay kneeling on the scooter and the ‘sticks’ were maybe a foot long and easy to use with a single hand. I remember some pinches fingers and it was also easy to get hit in the ankle by a passenger-less scooter shooting across the floor. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/38 "2023-04-27T18:41:23Z")
That sounds vaguely familiar. I remember the little paddles. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/39 "2023-04-27T18:41:46Z")
It sounds like a “sport” created by the manufacturers. ---
**Author:** ![AHunter3](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ahunter3/32/368_2.png) [@AHunter3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AHunter3)\ **Post date:** [April 27, 2023, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246/40 "2023-04-27T18:52:01Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > I hope this may give you and others an idea of what it was like for the dumb jocks in regular classes being called on to answer a question they obviously didn’t know the answer to while the brainiacs joyfully waved their arms in the air hoping to be called on Fair enough. I’ll cop to that. I was dismissive and acted superior, not just about being a brainiac but also for being like the girls and thinking & expressing very hostile judgmental things about masc boys, and it definitely intersected in PE class. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/has-it-ever-occurred-to-you-how-insane-elementary-school-gym-class-was/983246.md?page=3)