I don’t hate that as much as the pair above, but it is probably the most embarrassingly tone-deaf one.
Girl-child is bitching about her boss walking around singing Wham!'s Last Christmas. Me, my fingers ache from stabbing radio buttons in the car, but so far I’m relatively unscathed.
So this is kind of a cool thread, for Hatin’ on (Christmas Music)…
but when I opened it I read it as (Hatin’ on Christmas) Music.
So I’d like to mention one of my Christmas favorites in this thread:
12 Pains of Christmas - Bob Rivers
Although I will say that this song and Doug and Bob McKenzie’s 12 days of Christmas are the only renditions of that song I can stand.
That ghastly Slade song. Every time I hear that horrible chord change on ‘everybody’ I want to pull out my shotgun. How did the producer let that get through?
I love Christmas music, because I refuse to listen to the crap that’s been produced in the last few decades. All of which falls into 2 categories: a rant about how awful the Christmas season is, or a “gee I miss my baby” song* with a tenuous tie-in to Christmas.
Just put on a playlist of Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing Hark the Herald Angels Sing, and get your head right.
And I’ve got nothing against secular xmas tunes. Sleigh Ride, and Winter Wonderland, are bangers.
*The exception that proves the rule: Darlene Love’s “Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)” is one of the best songs of any genre ever. Of course, it’s also 60 years old.
My all-time favorite hate is “Happy X-mas (war is over)”
Just Nope.
Yoko screeching is not joyful.
Funny, she barely sings on it, never mind screeches and it is one of the best Christmas Songs.
I don’t understand your post.
I love Lennon. His part is great. The chorus is horrible. That grates on my nerves. No Christmas-y feels in that one.
Most of the time I’m not in the mood to hear the Chipmonks’ Christmas Song. I have to be feeling extremely nostalgic, or it grates.
Me and a friend of mine used to solemnly sing the last verse of Little Drummer Boy,
“Then he smiled at me, pah rum pum pum pum
Me and my drum…”
Then we’d go on,
“Mary said it was just gas, pah rum pum pum pum…
I kicked her in the ass, pah rum pum pum pum.”
Then we’d collapse in maniac girl giggles at the delicious blasphemy.
Once her mom caught us doing this, and started yelling at us and especially her for making fun of holy things… My friend said, “Yeah, you look in that Bible and tell me where there’s a little drummer boy.”
I stared in dumbstruck admiration at my friend. I would never have had the courage to stand up to my mom like that, especially in a religious matter.
Fun times.
I work in retail and welcome the change to Christmas music from the vapid pop crap that plays the other 11 months. If you have to listen to Best Day of My Life and Need You Now and the rest of that horrible loop of the same terrible songs that replays every single day from December 26th to Thanksgiving I promise you will be grateful for whatever form of Jingle Bells they want to play in December.
I worked at two radio stations that did the wall-to-wall-Christmas flip. I enjoyed the change of pace, though as a weekend DJ, I was only on the air one or two days a week. If I had to do it every day for two months, I might have had a different opinion.
Nowadays, hearing Christmas-y tunes while shopping, I’ve discovered there is one song that I absolutely cannot stand, no matter who sings it: “Last Christmas.”
“Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, but the very next day, you gave it away. This year, to save me from tears, I’ll give it to someone special.” Rinse and repeat. Yecch!
Oh, I love “Dominic the Donkey.” It’s a happy song that always makes me smile whenever I hear it. And just try to stop me from singing the “ho ho ho, who wouldn’t go” parts of Gene Autry’s “Up on the Housetop!” Though I find these lyrics a little disturbing…
“Look in the stocking of little Bill
Oh, just see what a glorious fill
Here is a hammer and lots of tacks
A whistle and a ball and a whip that cracks.”
A hammer, tacks and a whip?!!! Little Bill: Future serial killer.
Years ago, the first time I ever saw a cinema open on Christmas Day, I eagerly took my young son telling him, “It will be great. No-one will be going to the movies on Christmas Day.” When we got there we were confronted with huge queues of mostly Hindu and Moslem patrons. It was then that your point became obvious to both of us.
Not exactly hatin’ on The 12 Days of Christmas, but the song makes no sense to me. I asked in another Christmas music thread in a previous holiday season— is the singer just reiterating what their true love gave them in previous days, in addition to the latest gift, or repeatedly giving the previous gifts as well? The prevailing opinion was that the gifts were actually being re-given.
Which would mean that the singer’s true love gave them:
- 12 partridges in pear trees
- 22 turtle doves
- 30 French hens
- 36 calling birds
- 40 golden rings
- 42 geese a-laying
- 42 swans a-swimming
- 40 maids a-milking
- 36 ladies dancing
- 30 lords a-leaping
- 22 pipers piping
- 12 drummers drumming
That is a ridiculous amount of gifting. The singer’s true love must be extremely rich with a bad case of OCD. I hope the singer got a palatial estate on the 13th day of Christmas to have room to keep all those crazy gifts. And what’s with all the avian gifting? Seven days of gifts were types of birds; and the geese were ‘a-laying’, which means even more birds soon. Or lots of eggs for breakfast every morning.
I was a full-timer and I grew to hate it. Hour in, hour out, and not just while I was doing my board shift - in the lobby, in my cubicle, chopping them into 30-second pieces for commercials. And it’s not like radio stations have an infinite playlist of Christmas songs in their library, either. They buy a few dozen and then repeat them each year.
When I got married I told my wife I would gladly listen to Christmas music all day on Christmas Eve and until 6 p.m. on Christmas Day, but otherwise I did not want to hear it in my house or car. I have not changed my mind since.
- finishes giggling *
OK, I actually like a fair amount of Christmas music, but I can play. Our choir joins the local pops orchestra for a Christmas music extravaganza every year. The catch is that the orchestra director picks what music we gotta sing.
He inflicted this song on us called “Ten Thousand Joys”. So, to borrow your phrase, picture the scene:
Mary and Joseph get visited by the angel who tips them off what’s coming down the pike for their little family. And Mary sings rhapsodically about how she just knows it’s all gonna bring ten thousand joys. Well, there is that little bit about your kid’s going to end up getting his ass crucified and you’ll end up holding his lifeless body. I guess that’s the “some sorrow” the song acknowledges might be in the works alongside the ten thousand freaking joys.
shudder
Clearly none of you live in the Pacific Northwest, because you all seem to be completely unaware of the cosmic horror that is Christmas In The Northwest.
It’s the absolute most saccharine, glurgy, sentimental, twee, overproduced '80s soft-rock garbage Christmas song ever, and that FUCKING INCLUDES Wonderful Christmastime, Christmas Shoes, Carol of the Bells, Do They Know It’s Christmas, and anything Michael Buble ever inflicted on the holiday.
I find that I have to listen to it at least once a year just to remind myself of how terrible it is.
Click at your own peril.
I would rather listen to non-stop barking dogs for 24 hours than Feliz Navidad once.
Oh, I like the barking dogs Jingle Bells. Once. Per. Year. Just to see the grandkids giggle.