# Have a holly, jolly Christmas, and in case you didn't hear ... **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 1, 2003, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200 "2003-12-01T05:49:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/1 "2003-12-01T05:49:27Z")
Then take the fricken wax out of your ears, would you? Jeez, you think I’m up here hollying and jollying for my health? ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/2 "2003-12-01T06:06:52Z")
Chipmunks roasting on an open fire Jackals nipping at your nose You’ll tell Carol, “You’re a skunk and a liar And you smell like a billy goat.” Everybody knows some turkey under mistletoe Helps to make the party blight Tiny sots with their red eyes aglow Will find the pavement hard tonight They know that Santa’s been delayed He’s overloaded, overworked, and underpaid And every mother-F is gonna try To pot a reindeer with his piece as they fly by. And so I’m offering this special deal Buy now! Just $19.92! You know you’ve been had, many times, many ways Merry merchants screw you. ---
**Author:** ![SanguineSpider](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9a140/32.png) [@SanguineSpider](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SanguineSpider)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/3 "2003-12-01T06:55:47Z")
Methinks **ETF** has holiday issues. I don’t blame her, my fave holiday is Halloween anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/4 "2003-12-01T07:09:43Z")
Happy non-denominational end of the year celebration! ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 7:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/5 "2003-12-01T07:11:35Z")
I would like to add that those who choose not to use the christian calendar should not feelwronged or excluded, I wish that this winter season be the happiest for you and those around you, whomever they may be. ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 7:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/6 "2003-12-01T07:12:59Z")
Oh and please, to those in the southern hemisphere, I realize that this is summer for you folks and wish you a happy summer as well. I really need to shut up now. ---
**Author:** ![j\_kat\_251](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/71c47a/32.png) [@j\_kat\_251](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j_kat_251)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 7:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/7 "2003-12-01T07:21:49Z")
> [@](#): > > christian calendar May I ask when they invented this interesting chronological tool? ---
**Author:** ![Chavardz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/91b2a8/32.png) [@Chavardz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chavardz)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 7:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/8 "2003-12-01T07:26:04Z")
At the alleged birth of christ? But you are right, the months as we know them are actually roman. ---
**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 1:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/9 "2003-12-01T13:17:19Z")
And the days are mostly named for Teutonic gods and goddesses. ---
**Author:** ![LorieSmurf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a587f6/32.png) [@LorieSmurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LorieSmurf)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/10 "2003-12-01T15:16:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by j\_kat\_251 \* > \*\*May I ask when they invented this interesting chronological tool? \*\* \Beavis and butthead\ You said “tool” huhhuh huh huh yeah, yeah…“tool” hehehehehehheehee /beavis and butthead/ ---
**Author:** ![congodwarf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e36b37/32.png) [@congodwarf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/congodwarf)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2003, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-a-holly-jolly-christmas-and-in-case-you-didnt-hear/216200/11 "2003-12-01T17:58:32Z")
Jack Frost roasting on an open fire, Rudolph nipping at your nose, Yuletide choirs being burned at the stake and turkey stuffed with misteltoe… Sorry, I don’t know the rest. My mom told me once that my uncle used to sing this to the tune of Chestnuts Roasting on an Open Fire. Methinks she never told me the rest because I was too young to hear it. I had forgotten about this until I visited this thread. Now I can’t remember the right words to the song 😃