# Have Clog Boy translate your favourite insult to Dutch! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 10, 2000, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793 "2000-04-10T11:35:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Surgoshan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Surgoshan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surgoshan)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/41 "2000-04-10T20:47:00Z")
Hmm, Fuck em if they can’t take a joke. In french, it might be: Les **nict** s’ils puevent pas prendre une plaisanterie. “Lay kneect seal poov pa prawn dre oon play son ter ee” The bolded word is iffy. might wanna check with someone more up to date on their french. * * * I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail. ---
**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/42 "2000-04-10T21:49:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Coldfire: > \*\* Neukwafel. > > “Nóó-k wáá-ful” > > My fave so far :D\*\* Could this be where the term nooky (for sex) came from? Here’s one for you, Coldy! “Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries!” * * * VB Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well. ---
**Author:** ![TripleAnt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e19adc/32.png) [@TripleAnt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TripleAnt)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/43 "2000-04-10T22:00:00Z")
How about: You are nothing more than a llama’s anus? Thanks * * * “I have a lot of good ideas, problem is most of them suck.” -George Carlin ---
**Author:** ![BigRoryG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f07891/32.png) [@BigRoryG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigRoryG)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/44 "2000-04-10T22:57:00Z")
The french might work better as: “Foudrez-les s’ils ne peuvent pas prendre une plaisentrie” “foodray lay seal neu …” * * * “My drinking team has a Rugby problem.” _This sig line has been brought to you by the creative mind of Wally_ If you need a graphic solution, [http:\ alk.to\Piglet](http://http:%5C%09alk.to%5CPiglet) ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/45 "2000-04-10T23:10:00Z")
How about “you are a monumental waste of carbon”? ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2000, 11:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/46 "2000-04-10T23:50:00Z")
OK, the line stops here. I’ll start translating now, but no more new entries. Oh and Satan? Lik mijn zak 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/47 "2000-04-11T00:04:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Tengu: > You’re a slice short of a loaf Voor een brood kom je een sneetje te kort. > [@](#): > > a joker short of a full deck Voor een hele stok kom je een joker te kort. > [@](#): > > a coffin short of a funeral Voor een begrafenis kom je een kist te kort. > [@](#): > > and about 3 bits short of a byte Voor een byte kom je ongeveer 3 bits te kort. These don’t really work in Dutch though. The “one \*\*\*\* short of a \*\*\*\*” is just too English to translate. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/48 "2000-04-11T00:05:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Satan: > You sir, are nothing but walking anal leakage. U, Meneer, bent niets dan een lopende anale lekkage. Very snappy, even in Dutch! ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/49 "2000-04-11T00:06:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by android209: > **How about ‘You can stick your total football up your arse’?. Or maybe ‘4-1’. > 😃** I think we both know I’m not going to translate that. Couch hooligan 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/50 "2000-04-11T00:09:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Rysdad: > Kiss me on the fat part of my ass! Kus me op het vette deel van mijn reet! > [@](#): > > Why don’t run along and play hide and go fuck yourself? Waarom flikker je niet gewoon op en ga je verstoppertje met jezelf spelen? ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/51 "2000-04-11T00:12:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Canthearya: > Suck my ass Zuig mijn reet. Althoug “Lik mijn reet” is more common. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/52 "2000-04-11T00:14:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by phouka: > Fuck off you cum burping, corporate whore and let me pee in peace. Flikker op, jij zaad opboerende bedrijfssloerie, en laat me op mijn gemak zeiken! ---
**Author:** ![Lexicon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ac8455/32.png) [@Lexicon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lexicon)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/53 "2000-04-11T00:15:00Z")
Ooooh, yeah, do this one! Fuck off, you fucking bucket of fuck! * * * Sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/54 "2000-04-11T00:16:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by WhiteNight: > Fuck 'em if they can’t take a joke! Laat ze opflikkeren als ze niet tegen een geintje kunnen! ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/55 "2000-04-11T00:20:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Surgoshan: > What in the sweet name of holy fuck is wrong with you? Will you please stop making noises with your mouth? You seriously annoy me. In fact, I’m beginning to progress into a stage of annoyance the likes of which the world has never seen before. QUAIL BEFORE ITS AWESOME GLORY! THIS ANNOYANCE IS BEYOND ALL! BEHOLD, HE IS RISEN! Wat is er in godskleresnaam met jou mis? Wil je asjeblieft ophouden met het maken van geluiden met je mond? Je bent vreselijk irritant. Feitelijk kom ik in stadia van irritatie die tot voor kort nog onbekend waren in deze wereld. BUIG VOOR DE VRESELIJKE GLORIE! DEZE IRRITATIE GAAT VERDER DAN ELKE ANDERE! KIJKT EN ZIET, HIJ IS VERREZEN! Happy to olbige 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/56 "2000-04-11T00:24:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Vestal Blue: > Could this be where the term nooky (for sex) came from? Interesting. It wouldn’t be the first word in the English/American language that has its origings in Dutch. Boss (“Baas”) and coffee (“koffie”) come to mind. Why not nooky 😉 > [@](#): > > Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries! Je moeder was een hamster en je vader stonk naar kruisbessen! ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/57 "2000-04-11T00:25:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by TripleAnt: > You are nothing more than a llama’s anus Je bent gewoon een lama-reet. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/58 "2000-04-11T00:27:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Jezebel: > you are a monumental waste of carbon Je bent een verschrikkelijke koolstofverspilling. ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/59 "2000-04-11T00:31:00Z")
> [@](#): > > Originally posted by Lexicon: > \*\*Ooooh, yeah, do this one! > Fuck off, you fucking bucket of fuck! > \*\* Well _alright_… although you’re clearly in violation of the deadline, you’re also one cool poster. Here goes, the Grande Finale: **FLIKKER OP, JIJ FLIKKERENDE EMMER MET FLIKKER!** Thank you, and goodnight. One Grolsch and one cigar for mr. Coldfire, please 😃 * * * **Defect borg: _“Refutile is sistance. Your ass will be simulated”._** * * * **WallyM7** on Coldfire: _ **"Yeah, he knows a little about everything because they have a good prison library."** _ ---
**Author:** ![Seraphim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ad7895/32.png) [@Seraphim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Seraphim)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2000, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793/60 "2000-04-11T03:23:00Z")
Hey, you forgot me!! Justice, I demand justice! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-clog-boy-translate-your-favourite-insult-to-dutch/15793.md?page=4)