# Have you ever been a best man or maid of honor? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 10, 2017, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296 "2017-05-10T16:33:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![MovieMogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@MovieMogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MovieMogul)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/1 "2017-05-10T16:33:04Z")
NOT just a groomsman or bridesmaid, ring bearer or flower girl, officiant, orator, or music performer at a wedding. ONLY if you’ve been the #1 person on the groom or bride’s side. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/2 "2017-05-10T16:34:51Z")
Yes, but my wife and I were the only witnesses to the wedding (at the courthouse) So, five total in attendance, including the judge, and the bride and groom. So, I had no responsibilities. ---
**Author:** ![Telemark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/telemark/32/372_2.png) [@Telemark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Telemark)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/3 "2017-05-10T16:54:28Z")
Best man twice. One marriage stood the test of time, the other didn’t. ---
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/4 "2017-05-10T16:56:56Z")
> [@Telemark](#): > > Best man twice. One marriage stood the test of time, the other didn’t. Same here. ---
**Author:** ![iiandyiiii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/iiandyiiii/32/7924_2.png) [@iiandyiiii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iiandyiiii)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/5 "2017-05-10T16:57:01Z")
Once, for my brother’s wedding. He was my best man at mine, too. Coincidentally, they were months apart. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 4:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/6 "2017-05-10T16:58:39Z")
I was Best Man in three weddings. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/7 "2017-05-10T17:09:45Z")
Maid of honor when my two best friends got married, 18 years ago. Still going strong, I did good 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 5:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/8 "2017-05-10T17:13:46Z")
Yes, brother. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/9 "2017-05-10T17:15:18Z")
Best man once, for my brother. The marriage lasted twenty five years, then ended a year or so ago. I comforted him with, “well, we all said you could do better.” I’ll be performing my 6th wedding this summer. ---
**Author:** ![Emily\_Litella](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/emily_litella/32/3370_2.png) [@Emily\_Litella](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emily_Litella)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/10 "2017-05-10T17:21:08Z")
vote 2 - 4 times - not big weddings at fancy venues I was Maid of Honor for my sister, but she was married in our Grandparents’ backyard and the reception was at the VFW hall, mostly just family in attendance. This was 1980 and we wore off the rack Gunne Sax dresses. I was Maid of Honor for my best friend for her first wedding, which didn’t last long. This wedding was in 1979 and she was pregnant. She said she married him because he didn’t drink or do drugs. Instead of a honeymoon a bunch of us went to dinner and then the movies and saw Kramer vs. Kramer. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/11 "2017-05-10T18:08:54Z")
> [@Emily\_Litella](#): > > Instead of a honeymoon a bunch of us went to dinner and then the movies and saw Kramer vs. Kramer. What a choice for a wedding night! Just did it once, for my brother. Very informal and small wedding, no tux. ---
**Author:** ![Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tim_r.mortiss/32/142_2.png) [@Tim\_R.Mortiss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tim_R.Mortiss)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 6:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/12 "2017-05-10T18:17:45Z")
Four times. Two are still going strong. One of the success stories included a ceremony at a 500 year old church in Stockholm, followed by a reception at the Astrid Lindgren museum. Very surreal! ---
**Author:** ![CalMeacham](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calmeacham/32/35_2.png) [@CalMeacham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CalMeacham)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/13 "2017-05-10T18:31:42Z")
I was a Best Man three times in one year. Never a Maid of Honor, though. ---
**Author:** ![Leaffan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leaffan/32/299_2.png) [@Leaffan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leaffan)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/14 "2017-05-10T18:36:20Z")
> [@kayaker](#): > > … > I’ll be performing my 6th wedding this summer. Performing? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/15 "2017-05-10T18:43:55Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > Performing? Solemnizing. Officiating. I think of it as a performance, but maybe that’s an inappropriate word. ---
**Author:** ![Paintcharge](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/paintcharge/32/7946_2.png) [@Paintcharge](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Paintcharge)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/16 "2017-05-10T19:05:23Z")
twice for my brother. Neither one stuck. ---
**Author:** ![Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a183cd/32.png) [@Barkis\_is\_Willin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Barkis_is_Willin)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/17 "2017-05-10T19:08:10Z")
Was a best man once. The marriage was not a good one and it did not last long. I was apparently so bad that when my friend got re-married about 3 years after the first one, I wasn’t even invited. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/18 "2017-05-10T19:19:24Z")
Best Man once. It was such a foregone disaster that all the groomsmen and bridesmaids had a pool as to how long it would last. I won $200. ---
**Author:** ![Icarus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/icarus/32/72_2.png) [@Icarus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Icarus)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/19 "2017-05-10T19:26:10Z")
I was best man at my wife’s brother’s wedding. His brother didn’t want to do it (shy) so I was picked. It was small, just me and the maid of honor. What was fun was the maid of honor was not able to attend the rehearsal, so she didn’t know anything about what she had to do during the ceremony. NO PROBLEM! Throughout the ceremony I kept quietly giving instructions - loud enough for her to hear, but quiet enough that the audience didn’t. “Turn and stand next to her…” “Take her bouquet…” “Help her with her skirt…” It worked out OK. ---
**Author:** ![DrFidelius](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drfidelius/32/3447_2.png) [@DrFidelius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrFidelius)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2017, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296/20 "2017-05-10T19:47:37Z")
Been a groomsman a few times, never Best Man. My Wife was Matron of Honor for one of the brides at the second to last wedding we attended. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-been-a-best-man-or-maid-of-honor/786296.md?page=2)