# Have you ever pulled a muscle while wiping your butt? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 4, 2013, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053 "2013-01-04T13:34:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [January 6, 2013, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/41 "2013-01-06T06:30:55Z")
> [@Superhal](#): > > Speaking of freak injuries, I also injured my back because of a cheese-related incident. > > What does “throwing out your back” actually mean? I’ve had a variety of back injuries from sprains, tears, subluxations, etc. but I have no idea what “throwing out your back” actually means. [I recently asked this in GQ](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=667996). And as for the OP not that I’m aware of. I’ve caused myself agony in the general area of my kidneys reaching around a carseat more than once, though. ---
**Author:** ![Superhal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b4bc9f/32.png) [@Superhal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superhal)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/42 "2013-01-07T01:23:05Z")
So, we’re not going to hear the stories about people who injured themselves wiping somebody else’s butt? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/43 "2013-01-07T01:42:00Z")
No, because that would be gross. ---
**Author:** ![applebetty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/4af34b/32.png) [@applebetty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/applebetty)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 3:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/44 "2013-01-07T03:51:36Z")
No, but I occasionally pull a groin muscle trying to empty the right side pocket of my bladder. ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/45 "2013-01-07T17:35:39Z")
I’m not sure “pulled a muscle” is the right term, but I sometimes get muscle spasms in my lower back from doing the most trivial moves, and that’s one of them. ---
**Author:** ![pohjonen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pohjonen/32/423_2.png) [@pohjonen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pohjonen)\ **Post date:** [January 7, 2013, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/46 "2013-01-07T17:50:28Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > Who wipes their butt with their elbows? 😕 Try wiping yours without bending your arms and get back to us. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2013, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/47 "2013-01-08T15:07:44Z")
> [@pohjonen](#): > > Try wiping yours without bending your arms and get back to us. Or backside to you. ---
**Author:** ![Delta-9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/3be4f8/32.png) [@Delta-9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Delta-9)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2013, 4:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/48 "2013-01-08T16:12:38Z")
Cookies! ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [January 8, 2013, 6:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/49 "2013-01-08T18:22:46Z")
No, but sometimes a pull a muscle while washing my ass in the shower. No, not that muscle… I usually pull that one later in the day. ---
**Author:** ![Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ce7236/32.png) [@Mona\_Lisa\_Simpson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lisa_Simpson)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2013, 8:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/50 "2013-01-09T08:52:58Z")
I have been hurt while wiping someone else’s butt. But I am a nurse that works with patients with [BPSD (biological and psychological symptoms of dementia](http://www.wikidoc.org/index.php/Behavioral_and_psychotic_symptoms_of_dementia) and basically have had patients that will beat the crap out of you… while you are wiping the crap off them. But no, never got hurt wiping my own but, never! ---
**Author:** ![si\_blakely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)\ **Post date:** [January 9, 2013, 9:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/51 "2013-01-09T09:18:31Z")
> [@Suil\_Dubh](#): > > I have a bum shoulder. In high school, while play wrestling, my friend threw me over his back and I landed square on my shoulder. It popped out of joint, then popped back in. I don’t know if you’d call it a true dislocation, but the pain was unbelievable. [Subluxation](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Subluxation), probably with torn rotator cuff. Go ahead, ask me how I know. :smack: Without appropriate treatment/remediation, they can take a long time to heal properly (like most of a lifetime). I am currently dealing with a shoulder impingement, the result of not properly address my ongoing shoulder issues. It will take weeks of careful work before I can do straightforward chest and shoulder exercises. As for butt wiping, I have popped my shoulder doing that. I have also twinged neck muscles as I dropped my shoulder to reach behind. Shit happens, especially if you have musculo-skeletal issues, and the toilet is just one of many places where this happens (well, it should be the only place shit happens, but, you know how it can be). Anyhow, there are worse things, like building up so much muscle in your arms and shoulders that you physically cannot wipe your own butt. No shit. And people deliberately do this. Why? Si ---
**Author:** ![Fats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/59ef9b/32.png) [@Fats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fats)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2013, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/52 "2013-06-29T22:40:11Z")
Found this thread while searching for remedies. I needed a good laugh. But this problem is very real for some folks. Periodically I get lower back muscle spasms–excruciating. But this is the worst episode yet–today is the first time ever in my life I cannot wipe my ass. Thankfully, I am able to make it into the shower. This shit is sure a pain in the ass. No pun intended. Oh, no, I feel another shit coming on. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/53 "2013-06-30T01:35:26Z")
All I know is irritable bowel syndrome doesn’t entitle you to vacation, but you may take time in loo. ---
**Author:** ![slowlearner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@slowlearner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slowlearner)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/54 "2013-06-30T02:01:12Z")
> [@](#): > > time in loo God wants us to make puns, and that’s a good one. I hurt my SI joint when I was young and every few years it will go out over the silliest things, and the butt wiping is one of them. Happily, it’s a short crawl from toilet to bed. take time in loo… ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/55 "2013-06-30T02:16:49Z")
This reminds me of English soccer goalkeeper David Seaman, who famously injured his back while reaching for the TV remote control. Apparently, striker Robbie Keane busted a knee in the same way. Then there’s Spanish goalie Santiago Canizares, who missed out on the 2002 World Cup because of a severed tendon in his foot, caused by dropping a bottle of cologne on it in his bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![Accidental\_Martyr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ce7236/32.png) [@Accidental\_Martyr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Accidental_Martyr)\ **Post date:** [June 30, 2013, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/56 "2013-06-30T04:58:43Z")
No, but I broke my finger putting a leash on my dog. ---
**Author:** ![Kellychaffee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/67e7ee/32.png) [@Kellychaffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kellychaffee)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2022, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/57 "2022-10-28T04:46:17Z")
I wanted to thank all of you for the comments. As I really did type those words into google, I found this place and all your comments. I’m sitting in the ER trying to figure out what I did to sprain a muscle in my chest. I came to the ER because it was getting hard to breathe and I thought maybe it was something other than a pulled muscle. Whatever it is, it is much worse now thanks to all of you. My sides now hurt as well from laughing so hard. Hopefully they can do something for my pain. When I came in, it was around a level 6. It is now a ten and I’m telling the Dr. why…🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2022, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/58 "2022-10-28T05:04:52Z")
Welcome to the SDMB. I hope you can find other entertaining threads while waiting to see the doctor. Good luck. 😀 ---
**Author:** ![Nars\_Glinley](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nars_glinley/32/8177_2.png) [@Nars\_Glinley](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nars_Glinley)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2022, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/59 "2022-10-28T10:41:20Z")
It wasn’t as bad as a pull because it didn’t last very long. More like a strain. I felt it on the side of my lower rib cage. It went away in a couple of minutes but it really does hurt. And now I see that this is a zombie. ---
**Author:** ![puzzlegal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/puzzlegal/32/3827_2.png) [@puzzlegal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/puzzlegal)\ **Post date:** [October 28, 2022, 11:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053/60 "2022-10-28T11:07:47Z")
Yes, it’s an old thread. But human bodies haven’t changed much since it was active. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-pulled-a-muscle-while-wiping-your-butt/646053.md?page=4)