# Have you ever regretted being an attractive woman? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [October 9, 2014, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855 "2014-10-09T12:27:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Orville\_mogul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/aeb1de/32.png) [@Orville\_mogul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Orville_mogul)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/1 "2014-10-09T12:27:51Z")
A friend of mine has a very cute-looking 6 yo daughter, who will clearly be an attractive woman when she grows up. Seeing her got me to thinking of how fortunate she was to be attractive and how it would probably make her life easier in a number of ways. But then it also occurred to me that it could be a real nuisance to have people constantly hitting on her, and in some cases, she might even suffer from reverse-discrimination. Of course this is just conjecture on my part, being neither female nor especially attractive. So I would like to hear from Dopers about their experiences of being easy on the eye. And before you ask, no, this is not a thinly-veilled attempt to figure out who on the board is hot, nor will I ask you for photographic proof or a phone number 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Lendervedder](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/happy_lendervedder/32/8488_2.png) [@Happy\_Lendervedder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Lendervedder)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/2 "2014-10-09T13:26:02Z")
Incidentally, just because someone is attractive at 6 doesn’t mean they’ll maintain that physical attractiveness as adults. I have two sets of cousins who are sisters. The two who are most attractive as adults were actually pretty funny looking as 6-year-olds. The ones who were extremely cute as kids…well, let’s say they peaked early. ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/3 "2014-10-09T13:30:57Z")
Quite true. I have a niece who, at age 6, was modeling for a catalog. She grew up to be quite plain and ordinary looking, with a rather poor self-image. Possibly, in part, due to the unfulfilled expectations she was growing up with. ---
**Author:** ![Stringbean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Stringbean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stringbean)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/4 "2014-10-09T13:51:54Z")
I have never regretted being an attractive man. It has given me the benefit of the doubt so often: people are nicer when they meet me, women are more willing to put up with my personality flaws, and I can easily get an erection when I stare at myself in the mirror. ---
**Author:** ![The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ecc23a/32.png) [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_wind_of_my_soul)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/5 "2014-10-09T14:06:57Z")
Overall, I would absolutely say I enjoy every bit of attractiveness I have and would love to be even more attractive. While I wouldn’t call it _regret_, I did have an interesting experience a couple days ago that pertains to this topic. I went out to lunch with my fiance. After lunch, we decided to split up for a bit and meet up later. As soon as we split up, men started very pointedly checking me out. There was a huge difference between how men looked at me when I was with my fiance and how they looked at me when I was walking by myself. While no one approached me, the men who checked me out were doing it obviously enough that I think it was meant to be noticed. I suspect that if I had made eye contact with them and smiled, it might have emboldened them to make a move. All I was doing was walking back to our car, and I did not like having to be so hyper-aware of my behavior, in fear that it might solicit an unwanted reaction from the men around me. But just to reiterate, I do not think it’s a bad thing at all to be attractive, and I make an effort to accentuate my features and appear as attractive as I possibly can. (Well, within reason. Wearing low-cut shirts or short skirts tend to be an invitation for men to ogle me. I would like to be admired, but not ogled.) ---
**Author:** ![Velocity](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/velocity/32/18006_2.png) [@Velocity](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velocity)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/6 "2014-10-09T15:15:26Z")
> [@Stringbean](#): > > I have never regretted being an attractive man. It has given me the benefit of the doubt so often: people are nicer when they meet me, women are more willing to put up with my personality flaws, and I can easily get an erection when I stare at myself in the mirror. I think the OP’s point is that attractiveness can be a nuisance for women in ways that it’s not for men. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/7 "2014-10-09T15:19:30Z")
I have never regretted being an attractive woman. That would require extensive surgery at both ends. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/8 "2014-10-09T15:29:14Z")
I’ve regretted knowing some. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/9 "2014-10-09T15:32:41Z")
> [@Happy\_Lendervedder](#): > > Incidentally, just because someone is attractive at 6 doesn’t mean they’ll maintain that physical attractiveness as adults. I have two sets of cousins who are sisters. The two who are most attractive as adults were actually pretty funny looking as 6-year-olds. **The ones who were extremely cute as kids…well, let’s say they peaked early.** What I call “The Daniel Radcliffe Effect.” ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/10 "2014-10-09T15:35:34Z")
Being plain or unattractive doesn’t create a no-hitting-on zone. It just makes the guys hitting on you think that you should be grateful for it. Since one of the components of attractiveness is symmetry, being attractive usually means you’re a little healthier and have more efficient motion, on average. I’d go for that. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/11 "2014-10-09T15:49:44Z")
> [@Stringbean](#): > > and I can easily get an erection when I stare at myself in the mirror. …what this has to do with Women, I’ll never know. ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/12 "2014-10-09T16:34:43Z")
I would think it’s easier to make oneself unattractive than to make oneself attractive. So, if one is cursed looking like an angel, one can go out unwashed and skanky and not get unwanted attention. But when it’s a benefit… ---
**Author:** ![Nema98](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/d2c977/32.png) [@Nema98](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nema98)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/13 "2014-10-09T16:41:34Z")
> [@Count\_Blucher](#): > > …what this has to do with Women, I’ll never know. Well nothing, I think it was meant to be humorous. ---
**Author:** ![Learjeff](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/94ad74/32.png) [@Learjeff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Learjeff)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/14 "2014-10-09T17:01:16Z")
I occasionally meet a woman so beautiful that I’m tempted to remark what a pain in the ass it must sometimes be, to be so beautiful: the constant pressure from men. But I never say it, since I think that would just add to the nuisance. ---
**Author:** ![CT\_Damsel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CT\_Damsel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CT_Damsel)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/15 "2014-10-09T17:29:37Z")
No I do not regret being an attractive woman. On a few occasions I have experienced a sort of discrimination. One male boss assumed I was stupid; since I was attractive. I only know this because after a few months he mentioned he was shocked an attractive woman could be smart :smack: Also a few men have been wary of asking me out; thinking I would reject them. I found this out after **I** asked them out 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Asympotically\_fat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e47c2d/32.png) [@Asympotically\_fat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asympotically_fat)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/16 "2014-10-09T17:32:14Z")
Yes I often regret being an attractive woman, which is strange to say the least as I’m actually a not very attractive man. ---
**Author:** ![ZPG\_Zealot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e47c2d/32.png) [@ZPG\_Zealot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZPG_Zealot)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/17 "2014-10-09T17:52:47Z")
When I was a teenager I use to bind my breasts and add padding at my waist because I didn’t want the hassle of men bothering me. I still utterly hate to get dressed up in any way if I have to interact outside my own ethnic community because too many men seem to think if a woman is attractive it gives them license to bother her. I have sometimes thought of slashing up my face, but why should I have to disfigure myself because of other peoples’ disgusting manners. I’ve thought about face veils, but the Muslim women I know who do wear full-face veils have all said, it doesn’t really work. ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/18 "2014-10-09T18:56:45Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > What I call “The Daniel Radcliffe Effect.” I think you misspelled “Haley-Joel Osment” there… Radcliffe pretty much looks like he did, to my eyes. [Companion thread here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?p=17802191#post17802191). ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 7:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/19 "2014-10-09T19:13:22Z")
I haven’t gone very deep into this subject, but I’ve always intuitively felt that most men rank themselves on a scale of 1-10, and tend to mostly hit on women one point up the scale from their own self evaluation. If a man thinks of himself as a 6, he will hit on women who are a 7, and leave everybody else pretty much alone. For a man to aspire to a woman several points up the scale is often an indication of his immaturity. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2014, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855/20 "2014-10-09T19:40:19Z")
> [@Stringbean](#): > > and I can easily get an erection when I stare at myself in the mirror. This is understandable as I get an erection looking at you in the mirror too. > [@The\_wind\_of\_my\_soul](#): > > While no one approached me, the men who checked me out were doing it obviously enough that I think it was meant to be noticed. I suspect that if I had made eye contact with them and smiled, it might have emboldened them to make a move. Yes, this is one way people try to initiate the dance of getting to know one another to see if they are compatible. I’ve been looked at in such a way that was obviously the lady wanted to be noticed and on occasion I have gone up and said hi, but I am single. > [@Nema98](#): > > Well nothing, I think it was meant to be humorous. Yes, it was. So was what I said up above. > [@CT\_Damsel](#): > > One male boss assumed I was stupid; since I was attractive. I only know this because after a few months he mentioned he was shocked an attractive woman could be smart :smack: What’s so smack worthy about it? Our society has a stereotype that attractive women aren’t that bright because they figure out early on that they don’t need to be to get by in life. Usual disclaimer that one shouldn’t assume stereotypes are true and blah blah blah. > [@ZPG\_Zealot](#): > > I have sometimes thought of slashing up my face, That would have backfired and made you hotter because scars are sexy. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-regretted-being-an-attractive-woman/700855.md?page=2)