# Have you ever watched someone as they slept?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [September 15, 2015, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412 "2015-09-15T21:20:51Z")
**Posts on this page:** 14
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/21 "2015-09-16T16:14:59Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#):
>
> I agree the poll choices are not complete. I don’t think it’s creepy, but I do think it’s boring as all get out. Right up there with watching grass grow.
Exactly. I don’t see how it would ever be creepy unless it was a stranger and they’d broken into your home.
[QUOTE=Enginerd]
I think whether it’s sweet or creepy depends in large part on the relationship between the watcher and the sleeper. A parent watching an infant child sleep is sweet; a relative stranger watching a one-night-stand sleep is creepy as hell.
[/QUOTE]
What do you find “creepy as hell” about it? It’s been some time since I’ve had a one night stand, but assuming the room is light enough to even _see_ the person in bed next to you, what’s wrong with looking at them in their most natural, relaxed state?
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### Author:  [@Johanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johanna)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/22 "2015-09-16T18:10:34Z")
It depends. If you do that _[Paranormal Activity](https://youtu.be/D5us5VNgivk)_ thing, that’s definitely crossing a line of creepy.
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### Author:  [@sitchensis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sitchensis)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/23 "2015-09-16T18:27:28Z")
> [@congodwarf](#):
>
> I used to watch my fiance sleeping to see if he was breathing (severe sleep apnea - if he wasn’t snoring, he wasn’t breathing). Now I frequently catch myself watching him sleep, marveling at how peaceful and relaxed he is (and how quiet he is). I also watch our dogs sleeping because they’re so cute when they twitch and chirp and chase cats in their dreams.
I have to ask. If he’s not wearing a Darth Vador mask, what did he do to keep quite while sleeping?
If it goes over a minute or two it’s creepy
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### Author:  [@brovolone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brovolone)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/24 "2015-09-16T18:30:58Z")
Yes. I work at a hospital-- I walk in and make sure they’re still breathing while they sleep.
Some of them sleep with their eyes cracked open. That is horrifying btw if you’ve never seen it.
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### Author:  [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/25 "2015-09-16T19:47:02Z")
I may have clicked on the wrong option by accident (if what is now italicized is my selection). I definitely have done this, and I think all parents have - who hasn’t watched their baby sleeping?
I’ve done this with my wife, too. It’s a very strong feeling of protectiveness as well as love, actually, because you can become acutely aware of how vulnerable the sleeping person is.
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### Author:  [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/26 "2015-09-16T19:53:27Z")
I suffer from insomnia, and it’s not unusual for me to watch my partner sleep. The kittehs too. It sometimes helps me get back to sleep.
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### Author:  [@Enginerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enginerd)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/27 "2015-09-16T19:58:17Z")
> [@WOOKINPANUB](#):
>
> What do you find “creepy as hell” about it? It’s been some time since I’ve had a one night stand, but assuming the room is light enough to even _see_ the person in bed next to you, what’s wrong with looking at them in their most natural, relaxed state?
Maybe I’m reading into the question, but I think there’s a difference between “looking at” and “watching” somebody while they sleep. “Watching” seems like it’s incredibly intimate - much more intimate than casual sex - because of the protectiveness and the vulnerability that [b[robardin\*\* mentions.
It’s a level of intimacy that’s not really congruent with a one night stand, and it strikes me as an indicator of an extremely asymmetrical emotional investment. That implication is the thing that pegs my “creepy” meter. YMMV.
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### Author:  [@handsomeharry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/handsomeharry)
#### Post date: [September 16, 2015, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/28 "2015-09-16T23:45:31Z")
> [@Enginerd](#):
>
> I think whether it’s sweet or creepy depends in large part on the relationship between the watcher and the sleeper. A parent watching an infant child sleep is sweet; a relative stranger watching a one-night-stand sleep is creepy as hell.
This concept is strange to me; when one is through with the various activities related to coitus, watching them, while they sleep, is weird?
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### Author:  [@scootergirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/scootergirl)
#### Post date: [September 17, 2015, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/29 "2015-09-17T00:06:36Z")
> [@MandaJo](#):
>
> Do you two mean kids as well? It would be utterly alien to me if someone foind watching their own child sleep to be inherently “boring.”
I have two kids. When they were babies and later when they were young children, I have at times watched them sleep. It wasn’t necessarily boring, but it’s not something that I did for prolonged periods of time or very often. I did love cuddling with them, and I could predict down to the minute when my daughter would finally drift off when she was little. If I was lying beside her she would toss and turn for about 10 minutes. Then her body would be still and she’d let out exactly two yawns about 20 seconds apart. After the second one she would be out like a light. During these times of cuddling after a book or a story is when I would’ve watched her sleep for a short time.
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### Author:  [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)
#### Post date: [September 17, 2015, 12:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/30 "2015-09-17T00:27:01Z")
It was creepy. Not because I was doing anything perverse; it was my wife, who slept with her eyes half open. No one could watch that for long without getting the creeps.
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### Author:  [@Student\_Driver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Student_Driver)
#### Post date: [September 17, 2015, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/31 "2015-09-17T13:09:28Z")
Yeah. I’ve worked third shift for the last 15 or so years, but everyone I’ve dated has worked days. So I’m usually wide awake as they sleep, and they ask me to stay in bed with them. Sometimes it’s interesting, but usually just boring. I end up turning down the brightness on my phone and lie there surfing the Internet.
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### Author:  [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)
#### Post date: [September 17, 2015, 1:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/32 "2015-09-17T13:54:43Z")
I think nearly every parent has done this.
As very new first-time parents, we watched the baby sleep in part because we were terrified he would stop breathing.
New first-time parents are worrywarts. At least, we were. 😉
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### Author:  [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)
#### Post date: [September 17, 2015, 3:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/33 "2015-09-17T15:54:51Z")
> [@MandaJo](#):
>
> Do you two mean kids as well? It would be utterly alien to me if someone foind watching their own child sleep to be inherently “boring.”
Well, I do like watching puppies and kitties sleep. Do those count?
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### Author:  [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)
#### Post date: [September 17, 2015, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-ever-watched-someone-as-they-slept/731412/34 "2015-09-17T21:36:57Z")
I went with option 3, but only for lack of a better choice. By itself, it’s nothing. Context is everything.
For example, what Edward does to Bella in Twilight is fucking creepy–but that’s in the context of stalking her. She didn’t know it was happening, was not in a relationship with him, had not granted him access to her bedroom, etc.
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