# Have you got a crap thread? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 3, 2005, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874 "2005-01-03T19:22:56Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Roland\_Orzabal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c2a13f/32.png) [@Roland\_Orzabal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Roland_Orzabal)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 9:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/21 "2005-01-04T09:31:01Z")
I have two, actually. The first garnered a few more replies than the second, probably due as much as anything else to the fact that half of those replies were posted by me. Anyway, first off, there’s my [giant incomprehensible wad of autopsychological rambling crap](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=281229). Two people seem to have understood it. The rest either think I’m insane, or else they got bored when I didn’t reach any cogent point by a third of the way through and quit reading it. Second, there’s my [semi-intentionally incomprehensible wad of pseudophilosophical crap resulting from a stream of consciousness](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=273475), in which I invite others to generate some of the same. Remarkably, few chose to take me up on that offer. Seriously, people…where’s the love for abstract mental constructs devoid of practical substance or application? Huh? _Where’s the love?!_😉 ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/22 "2005-01-04T15:18:34Z")
I thought my [thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=293197&highlight=paratrooper) about the university students who threw a guinea pig tied to a parachute out the window would lead to a few jokes and/or replies. I got one. If you want a thread to REALLY die fast and get no views, try something on motor sports. ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/23 "2005-01-04T15:42:39Z")
I have [twelve threads](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/search.php?searchid=623921) that got nary a reply. A few I wasn’t too surprised, since I knew they’d have limited interest. A couple were disappointing. Most also had well under 50 views. So sad. But most of those threads are at least a year old. Perhaps I’m getting the hang of it. ---
**Author:** ![stuyguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ec9cab/32.png) [@stuyguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/stuyguy)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/24 "2005-01-04T16:00:56Z")
Hell, I got enough crap threads to weave a crap blanket! ---
**Author:** ![chrisk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@chrisk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chrisk)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/25 "2005-01-04T17:17:48Z")
Wow, I really haven’t started many threads here. Most of them have at least 10 replies. The true bombs: “Oddball keys on pcs”, in staff reports. 0 replies. “Tales of lost luggage”, in MPSIMS. 1 reply. ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/26 "2005-01-04T17:59:21Z")
Anytime these threads come up, I always harken back to my [Ode To Hamster Chow](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=262210). I read it now and wish I knew just what the hell I was talking about. ---
**Author:** ![klintypooh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3da27b/32.png) [@klintypooh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/klintypooh)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/27 "2005-01-04T19:02:43Z")
I once started a thread asking for 5000 Dopers to donate £1 each so I could be debt free and go uni, which was so utterly crap it got deleted or the hamsters got it. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![taxi78cab](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e47c2d/32.png) [@taxi78cab](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/taxi78cab)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/28 "2005-01-04T19:49:23Z")
> [@Hunter Hawk](#): > > My thread about [exploding peaches](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=267516) got a few replies, but I’m not sure how many people actually took notice of it. Or maybe I’m just more fond of that story than other people are. The exploding peaches story was HILARIOUS. Everyone here at work is really going to think I’m crazy for laughing like a maniac. ---
**Author:** ![Can\_Handle\_the\_Truth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Can\_Handle\_the\_Truth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Can_Handle_the_Truth)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/29 "2005-01-04T20:33:09Z")
So how many replies does it take to be a good thread? Or is it a matter of being on page 1 for a certain length of time? ---
**Author:** ![seosamh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@seosamh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seosamh)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/30 "2005-01-04T22:12:18Z")
I too have a zero reply post, about [The Life & Death of Peter Sellers](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=282648&highlight=peter+sellers). Watch out for Geoffrey Rush, Charlieze Theron and Emily Watson picking up their Golden Globes… ---
**Author:** ![seosamh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce7236/32.png) [@seosamh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/seosamh)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/31 "2005-01-04T22:14:20Z")
Eff it! Slip of the digits. **Charlize**. ---
**Author:** ![Ross](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e274bd/32.png) [@Ross](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ross)\ **Post date:** [January 4, 2005, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874/32 "2005-01-04T22:34:55Z")
I once wrote a thread on all the little philosophical niggles that kept occurring to me when posting on message boards, like whether or not a non-meeting board actually consituted a community, and where we were when we posted, and who we were, and what it said about self that we could post on three different boards under three different personas quite easily, and so on. It was well thought-out and I had put at least as much effort into it as I do into course essays. One person said “wow, nice thread”, and it sank like a brick. Simultaneously on another board I was posting a minor three-line waffle about how I’d always fancied Betty off of Frank Spencer, and that image-heavy, intellect-light thread ran for something like 90 pages as everyone confessed their less commonplace fancyings. Eventually the thread was shot as a danger to the stability of the internet. The moral is that thread popularity works on the same principle as book publishing. SEX SELLS. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-got-a-crap-thread/282874.md?page=1)