# "Have you stopped beating your wife?" **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 24, 2005, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031 "2005-12-24T00:38:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hentor_the_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/1 "2005-12-24T00:38:18Z")
I have grown very sick of this phrase, and moreso of the way people use it. People pull it out with great flourish as if it were some highly clever observation, or some great trick. Listen, unless you are in a situation where you can only answer yes or no, it’s just not a big deal. Just answer “I never did.” How fucking tricky is that? ---
**Author:** ![rayh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@rayh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rayh)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/2 "2005-12-24T00:49:02Z")
> [@Hentor the Barbarian](#): > > I have grown very sick of this phrase, and moreso of the way people use it. People pull it out with great flourish as if it were some highly clever observation, or some great trick. Listen, unless you are in a situation where you can only answer yes or no, it’s just not a big deal. > > Just answer “I never did.” How fucking tricky is that? You never did stop beating your wife? ---
**Author:** ![Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hentor_the_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/3 "2005-12-24T00:53:15Z")
> [@rayh](#): > > You never did stop beating your wife? 🙂 No. Just answer, “I never did beat my wife.” ---
**Author:** ![Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/ea5d25/32.png) [@Happy\_Scrappy\_Hero\_Pup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Scrappy_Hero_Pup)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/4 "2005-12-24T00:56:54Z")
So you don’t consider slapping her around to be beating? You’re not just sick, you’re also in denial. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/5 "2005-12-24T00:57:23Z")
> [@Hentor the Barbarian](#): > > Listen, unless you are in a situation where you can only answer yes or no, it’s just not a big deal. Um. Duh. This is actually _the whole point_; it’s an expression designed to display the fallacy of false dichotomy. It _always is_ “Answer me yes or no only, have you stopped beating your wife?” - that’s the whole point. ---
**Author:** ![Tevildo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9bd4f/32.png) [@Tevildo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tevildo)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/6 "2005-12-24T01:18:39Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Um. Duh. This is actually _the whole point_; it’s an expression designed to display the fallacy of false dichotomy. It _always is_ “Answer me yes or no only, have you stopped beating your wife?” - that’s the whole point. _Plurium Interrogationum_, actually. ---
**Author:** ![Eve](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/7 "2005-12-24T01:23:00Z")
Hell, no! In fact, I smacked the bimbo in th’ kisser just before I logged on. ---
**Author:** ![DiosaBellissima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a8b319/32.png) [@DiosaBellissima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DiosaBellissima)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/8 "2005-12-24T01:34:29Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > Hell, no! In fact, I smacked the bimbo in th’ kisser just before I logged on. But baby, I thought that you were going to stop telling your friends about our private life? I’m not tryin’ to talk back or anything, I swear. Look! Here’s your dinner! Steak medium rare, spinach just right- light salt, no pepper, a smidge of lemon, and your mashed potatoes- no lumps. I learned last time to make sure there weren’t any lumps… ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 1:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/9 "2005-12-24T01:42:26Z")
> [@Hentor the Barbarian](#): > > Just answer, “I never did beat my wife.” You are trying to bring shades of grey into a black and white question…did you or did you not stop beating your wife??? (which is kind of the whole point of asking that rhetorical question…to point out how stupid people are sometimes when asking loaded questions with just a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer). I’m not sure this topic is really pit worthy, but whatever floats your boat Hentor. 😛 -XT ---
**Author:** ![JimSox5](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b5a626/32.png) [@JimSox5](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JimSox5)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/10 "2005-12-24T01:46:44Z")
It’s not beating if she likes it. . . 😉 ---
**Author:** ![roshia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/6bbea6/32.png) [@roshia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/roshia)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/11 "2005-12-24T01:58:06Z")
> [@Eve](#): > > Hell, no! In fact, I smacked the bimbo in th’ kisser just before I logged on. Oh, Eve. I think you are my soulmate. Whenever I hear that question, that’s the almost word-for-word smartass response that goes through my mind. Le sigh. I would ask you to marry me, but, well, then there’s that whole wifebeating thing… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/12 "2005-12-24T01:59:31Z")
> [@Tevildo](#): > > _Plurium Interrogationum_, actually. Well, it works for either. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/13 "2005-12-24T02:02:52Z")
> [@rayh](#): > > You never did stop beating your wife? No, he never did stop beating his meat. That’s why he’s got hairy palms. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![tomndebb](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b9e5f3/32.png) [@tomndebb](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tomndebb)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 2:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/14 "2005-12-24T02:12:00Z")
> [@Hentor the Barbarian](#): > > Just answer “I never did.” How fucking tricky is that? Never watched any U.S. based courtroom dramas? A fairly standard plot device is for the antagonistic lawyer to direct a similar question to the hapless witness and when the witness begins to explain, the lawyer cuts him off with the order “Just answer ‘yes’ or ‘no,’ please.” (sometimes followed by a request to the judge to order the witness to answer only “yes” or “no”). When asked sarcastically in an informal debate, it evokes all the movies and all the episodes of TV shows where the good guy is sliced up by the damning testimony that required a “yes” or “no” answer. So we get a Pit thread because you have never watched (or have forgotten) TV? ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/15 "2005-12-24T02:49:54Z")
> [@Tevildo](#): > > _Plurium Interrogationum_, actually. Isn’t this a Harry Potter incantation? Ow! don’t hit me! ducks and runs… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/8edcca/32.png) [@Hentor\_the\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hentor_the_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/16 "2005-12-24T03:19:21Z")
> [@tomndebb](#): > > So we get a Pit thread because you have never watched (or have forgotten) TV? Of course I watched TV. I resent that remark! I didn’t really read it in its common usage as an invocation of something from TV. Seemed most often like a misapplication, but I suppose most other people were using an implied “Pretend you can only answer yes or no…”, if I read **Mangetout’s** “duh” correctly. _Mangez ca, tete de foudre!_ And **xtisme** , I could rant about something else fairly easily, if you prefer. But thanks for sharing. ---
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/17 "2005-12-24T03:25:06Z")
Question : “Have you stopped beating your wife ?” Answer : “No. She tried and tried, but she just has no talent for chess.” ---
**Author:** ![detop](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bcef8e/32.png) [@detop](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/detop)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/18 "2005-12-24T03:27:49Z")
> [@Hentor the Barbarian](#): > > _Mangez ca, tete de foudre!_ Eat this, lightning head ! 😕😕😕 ---
**Author:** ![XT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xt/32/456_2.png) [@XT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XT)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/19 "2005-12-24T03:54:37Z")
> [@Hentor the Barbarian](#): > > And xtisme, I could rant about something else fairly easily, if you prefer. But thanks for sharing. A pleasure, as always Hentor. 😛 -XT ---
**Author:** ![Good\_Egg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/96bed5/32.png) [@Good\_Egg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Good_Egg)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2005, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031/20 "2005-12-24T05:21:51Z")
I’ve stopped hentoring my barbarian. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/have-you-stopped-beating-your-wife/337031.md?page=2)