# He becoming She: How's it done? **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [August 4, 2004, 2:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284 "2004-08-04T14:00:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 3:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/61 "2004-08-09T03:02:43Z")
I don’t have much to say about the OP’s question, however, I would like to ask our fellow dopers to be gentle on us ignorant people. Let me explain. I’ve to adulthood thinking that people were either male, female or gay. I was fortunate enough that one of my aunts was friends with three gay men while I was growing up. Instead of seeing them as weird, or sick - despite my Catholic upbringing and being a pupil in a convent school - I saw them as normal human beings. And anyways, when you are a young child you don’t care who people are banging, I just knew that they didn’t like girls ‘in that way’ and that was enough information for me. It wasn’t until after a few years back that I heard the word ‘transgendered’. I thought it was the ‘word du jour’ for trasveti. A bit of ‘Yahooing’ (that was before the advent of Google) set me straight. I started reading, basically because I was astounded that this was news to me. I mean, why didn’t I know that? Who are these people? Are they gay? Are they crossdressers? I had heard of local men seeking out hormonal treatment and breast surgery, I thought it was part of the ‘crossdressing thing’. I was wrong. I am still open to learning. I am the least judgemental person you could find and always try to see life through other people’s eyes but I wasn’t born all-knowing (don’t believe everything you are told 🙂 ) So instead of assuming malice just think of ignorance. There is precious little you will lose by being patient and telling us ignorant people about the birds and the bees and why the dog is humping my leg and so on and so forth. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 3:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/62 "2004-08-09T03:04:22Z")
> [@Mighty\_Girl](#): > > I’ve to adulthood Should read: “I made it to adulthood…” ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/63 "2004-08-09T04:02:52Z")
I have a question – genderqueer? What exactly does that mean? That’s a new one for me. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 5:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/64 "2004-08-09T05:12:30Z")
> [@KellyM](#): > > Furthermore, since the testes are gone, along with the Cowper’s glands, such ejaculate will be considerably different in characteristic, and actually more closely resembles the vaginal secretions of a born woman than it does semen. **That** explains it! The first hermaphrodite I dated in 1994 (the one who was pre-op) had a miniature penis and two pseudo-testes, but not full-blown testes. When she got sexually aroused, her miniature penis would emit vaginal lubricant. Perhaps it was “ejaculate” without the contribution of testes and a Cowper’s gland. ---
**Author:** ![tracer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tracer/32/20578_2.png) [@tracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tracer)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/65 "2004-08-09T05:14:07Z")
> [@whiterabbit](#): > > I have a question – genderqueer? What exactly does that mean? That’s a new one for me. I was wondering the same thing. It sounds like one of those terms that’s similar to regular queer, but not quite the same, and one where if you ever make the mistake of confusing it for the garden-variety of queer you’ll be instantly pounced upon by the P.C. police. ---
**Author:** ![Ms2001](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ms2001/32/18463_2.png) [@Ms2001](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms2001)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/66 "2004-08-09T05:19:14Z")
> [@whiterabbit](#): > > I have a question – genderqueer? What exactly does that mean? That’s a new one for me. According to [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Genderqueer): > [@](#): > > A genderqueer person is part of a group of people who do not feel that they fit into the traditional two-gender system. > _[…]_ > There are different modes of being genderqueer, and it is an evolving concept. Some believe they are a little of both or feel they have no gender at all. Others believe that gender is a social construct, and choose not to adhere to that construct. Some genderqueers do fit into the stereotypical gender roles expected of their sex, but still reject gender as a social construct. Still other people identify as genderqueer since, though they are cisgendered _[the opposite of transgendered :dubious:]_, they do not fit many of society’s expectations for the gender in which they identify. > _[…]_ > The term genderqueer can (but does not necessarily) include any transgender person. These individuals challenge the social norms of gender definition, in much the same way as homosexual and bisexual individuals challenge the social norms of sexuality. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/67 "2004-08-09T14:16:23Z")
> [@tracer](#): > > It sounds like one of those terms that’s similar to regular queer, but not quite the same, and one where if you ever make the mistake of confusing it for the garden-variety of queer you’ll be instantly pounced upon by the P.C. police. I’m not sure how to react to this. Trust me, we’re aware that many people do not know the word genderqueer. The Wikipedia article quoted was as reasonable a definition as could be made for a word/concept in its infancy. Basically it means any person whose identity transgresses the social gender system, but who doesn’t necessarily identify as transgender or transsexual. I’m currently experimenting with identifying as genderqueer because, although I identify as a man, I’m rather an outlying phenotype, as **AHunter** put it so felicitously a short while back. ---
**Author:** ![whiterabbit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/cab0a1/32.png) [@whiterabbit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/whiterabbit)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/68 "2004-08-09T14:36:10Z")
Ah. That makes sense. Thank you. I have no idea why people are so hung up on why some people are so bothered by other people’s gender identification. What does it matter, as long as everybody’s happy? ARRRGH! (I feel precisely the same way about homosexuality.) ---
**Author:** ![KellyM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/57b2e6/32.png) [@KellyM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KellyM)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/69 "2004-08-09T18:23:06Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > I’m not sure how to react to this. Trust me, we’re aware that many people do not know the word genderqueer. > > The Wikipedia article quoted was as reasonable a definition as could be made for a word/concept in its infancy. Basically it means any person whose identity transgresses the social gender system, but who doesn’t necessarily identify as transgender or transsexual. One thing that needs to be clear is that not all transsexuals are genderqueer; I, for example, do not identify as genderqueer. It is possible for a transsexual to be genderqueer, however. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/70 "2004-08-09T18:32:28Z")
Hmm… That got complicated KellyM. Can you please tell us how many, er… gender, hmm, er people are there? Please don’t hit me, I don’t know all the words. I want to be educated, really. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/71 "2004-08-09T19:11:06Z")
It seems some people are holding back from asking questions for fear of being pounced upon. I never pounce upon anybody who asks a question that has been worded in an attempt to avoid offense, and is asked from a genuine desire to learn. This is a fascinating and confusing subject. Certain terms are considered offensive, but somebody who knows nothing about transexuals isn’t expected to know that. Frankly, I’m still trying to figure out why **Colophon** apologized before asking a perfectly valid, and rather intriguing, medical question. Maybe a list would help. The following are used only in pornography or prostitution and are considered extremely offensive- Shemale Chick with a dick The following are considered offensive because they imply that the indivual was born one gender and is either magically changed to another gender by surgery, or is still the gender listed on their birth certificate only surgically mutilated and suffering from delusions Born a man (when refering to mtf transexuals) Born a woman (when refering to ftm transexuals) Sex change The old joke ‘I’m a lesbian trapped in a man’s body’ is offensive to transexual lesbians. I’m still confused that I’ve never heard a transexual gay man take offense to Madonna’s often repeated claim to be ‘a gay man trapped in a woman’s body’. Finally, asking to see the genitals of a post-operative transexual should be done only in those situations in which you would normally ask to see a person’s genitals. ---
**Author:** ![Excalibre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/898d66/32.png) [@Excalibre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Excalibre)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/72 "2004-08-09T19:11:43Z")
> [@Mighty\_Girl](#): > > Hmm… That got complicated KellyM. > > Can you please tell us how many, er… gender, hmm, er people are there? Please don’t hit me, I don’t know all the words. I want to be educated, really. 🙂 Are you asking for statistics on the number of transgendered or genderqueer people? I doubt such a think exists. “Genderqueer” is a broad category, and not something traditionally studied by demographers; it’s more in the realm of gender theory. I doubt you’d find good numbers on transgendered people either, since many folks don’t end up getting surgery, and so even if someone is tracking the number of surgeries performed, it’s going to be a very low estimate. ---
**Author:** ![Mighty\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mighty\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mighty_Girl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/73 "2004-08-09T19:35:44Z")
I am asking how many different types or people (?) there are. So far we know about the garden variety lesbian and gay man, and of course straight woman and man. It is scary that the typically-level-headed-and-thoroughly-nice Eve’s first post in this thread was to say that she was offended by something that the OP seemed to have asked in good faith. It appears that certain people have been pounced on so many times that they inmediately assume malice when ignorance is a perfectly good explanation. How are we suppose to understand and respect who you are if you don’t tell us _who \* you are? Maybe the questions have been asked from you ten zillion times, sorry about that, but maybe if you educate_me \* I will go around educating other people. I know that I have educated my husband on certain aspect of people’s sexuality that he was completely unaware of. And even though he is good friend with a gay man and a lesbian he would sometimes use terms that I had learnt were considered offensive. A good talking and a few kicks and he got it. Or you can instead just get offended by our questions and some people will go continue to think that you are freaks, and cranky too. _I_ don’t want that. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/74 "2004-08-09T20:03:22Z")
**Mighty\_Girl** , yours is a fair question. [Here’s](http://www.efn.org/~lanegq/tranny_terms.html) a lexicon I came across; I hope it helps. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/75 "2004-08-09T20:06:08Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > Colovaginoplasty is a more complicated procedure in which a small segment of intestine is used to line the vagina. This provides a vagina which is self lubricating. I would like to hear more about this. How and why would a segment of intestine self-lubricate? How effective would it be? Would arrousal trigger it? How? ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/76 "2004-08-09T20:39:38Z")
> [@Mighty\_Girl](#): > > It is scary that the typically-level-headed-and-thoroughly-nice Eve’s first post in this thread was to say that she was offended by something that the OP seemed to have asked in good faith. It appears that certain people have been pounced on so many times that they inmediately assume malice when ignorance is a perfectly good explanation. [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=5137226&postcount=21](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showpost.php?p=5137226&postcount=21) **Eve** said she found nothing offensive until a thread which compared her to a person with delusions of being a snake, and implied that she was not a real woman. In my first post I informed **Kwikwitty** that the phrasing of the title was offensive. Pouncing was not my intention. I was simply trying to say "This is generally considered offensive. This is why. Please avoiding using the phrase in the future.’ Re Types Of People It’s a very confusing subject. You have at least three scales- sexual orientation, sexual identity, and gender identity. I don’t think I’ve linked to The Intersex Society Of North America yet. so [http://www.isna.org/drupal/index.php](http://www.isna.org/drupal/index.php) ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/77 "2004-08-09T20:59:46Z")
**Cisco** A quick search, turned up [this](http://www.geocities.com/greta2501/). ---
**Author:** ![KellyM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/57b2e6/32.png) [@KellyM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KellyM)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2004, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/78 "2004-08-09T23:22:45Z")
> [@Excalibre](#): > > Are you asking for statistics on the number of transgendered or genderqueer people? I doubt such a think exists. “Genderqueer” is a broad category, and not something traditionally studied by demographers; it’s more in the realm of gender theory. I doubt you’d find good numbers on transgendered people either, since many folks don’t end up getting surgery, and so even if someone is tracking the number of surgeries performed, it’s going to be a very low estimate. Estimates on the incident of transsexualism range from 1 in 100,000 (1960s study) to 1 in 1000 (informal study by Lynn Conway). I suspect the true value is around 1 in 3000, but don’t really have much to base that on. The APA continues to use a 1 in 30,000 number for male to female transsexualism, but I think that number is grossly low; I’ve lived in too many places all with transsexual densities significantly higher than that number for it to be right. While historically it’s been claimed that male to female occurs more often than female to male, the current best information puts the incidences at approximately equal. Transsexuals are a minority within (or as opposed to) the broader category of “transgendered”; I’ve seen estimates (and, no, I don’t recall where nor do I have details on methodology) of the total number of people who have some sort of significant sex/gender mismatch at around 1 in 300. ---
**Author:** ![Cisco](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ccd318/32.png) [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2004, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/79 "2004-08-10T00:15:31Z")
> [@DocCathode](#): > > **Cisco** > A quick search, turned up [this](http://www.geocities.com/greta2501/). That doesn’t realy answer any of my questions but it was somewhat informative. Um, thanks. ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2004, 12:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284/80 "2004-08-10T00:53:26Z")
I thought it did address some of your questions > [@Cisco](#): > > How and why would a segment of intestine self-lubricate? How effective would it be? Would arrousal trigger it? From the link, with my additions in {} > [@](#): > > Because the colon section is a mucous membrane,{How does it lubricate? It’s a mucous membrane.} as are normal vaginal linings, a colon-lined vagina feels basically the same as a normal vagina to a partner. . . . > > The colon section provides a constant source of lubrication, {The lubrication seems to be constant rather than being triggered by arousal} reducing the need for additional lubrication during sex, although some additional lubrication may make for more comfortable sex. {This implies that effectiveness varies from requiring no artificial lubricant, to not being able to have sex comfortably without use of one.} . . . > > The colon’s constant lubricating action {Again, it is not triggered by arousal, but lubricates constantly}has some unpleasant results: > In theory, the colon is self-cleaning, passing out secretions and tissue & blood residue. {Which would explain why the colon self-lubricates} . . . > > The mucous produced by the colon section is of a thicker consistency (ie. “gluggy”) than that of a natural vagina. {Thicker mucous would seem to be a less effective lubricant. However, I asummed that the viscosity of sigmoid and vaginal mucous vary from person to person. Effectiveness would depend on the colon in question} [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/he-becoming-she-hows-it-done/258284.md?page=5)