# Headlines you don't read every day **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 10, 2013, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645 "2013-06-10T19:14:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![jerseymule](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jerseymule/32/3155_2.png) [@jerseymule](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jerseymule)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2013, 2:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/41 "2013-06-18T14:11:50Z")
[Fla. deputy removes Doritos bag from deer’s head](http://www.stltoday.com/news/national/fla-deputy-removes-doritos-bag-from-deer-s-head/article_ed494977-5408-5bf9-b806-e38ea95cc5fe.html) I guess the deputy took a photo first. The deer did not struggle while the bag was removed. ---
**Author:** ![TBG](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c89c15/32.png) [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2013, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/42 "2013-06-21T00:02:10Z")
> [@picunurse](#): > > NO! NO! NO! I started the thread. > Before I could post this: _Naked Woman Missing in the Forest_ The board went down. For the next few minutes all I got was that annoying little box saying there’s a problem with the server. > When, about 5 minutes later, I was able to get back on, the thread was up, but empty of my initial OP. > Then **Simmerdown** posted his, rightfully, confused response. Then I posted the missing link and quote. > > Sigh. Oh, okay. ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2013, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/43 "2013-06-21T00:12:24Z")
> [@Bumbershoot](#): > > Anyway, here’s my contribution: > > [Scotland’s Moonwalking Pony in ‘Paternity Battle’](http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2013/06/10/Scotlands-moonwalking-pony-in-paternity-battle/UPI-16891370893625/) I heard a CBC Radio As it Happens update June 19, with Socks’ owner being interviewed. DNA test results show Socks isn’t the sire. ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2013, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/44 "2013-06-21T04:57:01Z")
“[Man Runs Out of Gas on Interstate, Sets Up Drum Kit to Kill Time](http://gawker.com/man-runs-out-of-gas-on-interstate-sets-up-drum-kit-to-509165589)” ---
**Author:** ![Princhester](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/3e96dc/32.png) [@Princhester](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Princhester)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2013, 7:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/46 "2013-06-21T07:13:34Z")
Anyone else have a Pogues song in their head right now? ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2013, 11:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/47 "2013-06-21T11:06:08Z")
[Woman dressed as vagina stops street fight between penis and man in Glastonbury](http://www.centralsomersetgazette.co.uk/Man-penis-costume-assaulted-Glastonbury-High/story-19328715-detail/story.html) ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [June 21, 2013, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/48 "2013-06-21T13:53:11Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > Back when I took the Dallas Morning News every day in dead tree version, I’d frequently see a headline about a Dallas Cowboy being caught in another crime of some sort. In a similar vein, “Bengals Player Arrested” is an endlessly recyclable headline. ---
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 11:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/49 "2013-06-24T11:29:01Z")
[Masturbating man caught molesting bicycle](http://www.thelocal.se/48642/20130623/) ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 11:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/50 "2013-06-24T11:57:20Z")
> [@Kimballkid](#): > > At least, since you are a woman, you wouldn’t have to worry about the hillbillies from Deliverance. …but if she’s found by Washington state hunters, Dear Og don’t let her say " I’m game… ". :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Kenm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/bc79bd/32.png) [@Kenm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kenm)\ **Post date:** [June 24, 2013, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/51 "2013-06-24T13:47:06Z")
> [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](#): > > [Masturbating man caught molesting bicycle](http://www.thelocal.se/48642/20130623/) > > > [@](#): > > > > Östersund police are investigating whether there is any connection between the recent spate of masturbation bike attacks with similar incidents from 2007. A _spate_ of them? And this is the _second_ such spate? What the hell is in the water? ---
**Author:** ![Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/a587f6/32.png) [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freddy_the_Pig)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2013, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/52 "2013-06-25T19:05:52Z")
> [@Kenm](#): > > A _spate_ of them? And this is the _second_ such spate? What the hell is in the water? Apparently the man always slashes the tires when he bike-masturbates. It isn’t clear to me if or how this enhances the masturbatory experience. ---
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2013, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/53 "2013-06-25T19:28:28Z")
From a few weeks ago: [Big rig carrying fruit crashes on 210 Freeway, creates jam](http://articles.latimes.com/2013/may/20/local/la-me-ln-big-rig-crash-20130520) Well played, LA Times. ---
**Author:** ![Death\_of\_Rats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a6a055/32.png) [@Death\_of\_Rats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Death_of_Rats)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2013, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/54 "2013-06-25T20:04:31Z")
> [@Kenm](#): > > A _spate_ of them? And this is the _second_ such spate? What the hell is in the water? Spanish fly ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2013, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645/55 "2013-06-25T20:13:28Z")
> [@Freddy\_the\_Pig](#): > > Apparently the man always slashes the tires when he bike-masturbates. It isn’t clear to me if or how this enhances the masturbatory experience. He’s into slash friction. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/headlines-you-dont-read-every-day/660645.md?page=2)