# Heartbroken because of a brother's lies

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heartbroken-because-of-a-brothers-lies/591420>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [August 4, 2011, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heartbroken-because-of-a-brothers-lies/591420 "2011-08-04T03:55:41Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Page:** 4

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\
**Post date:** [August 7, 2011, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heartbroken-because-of-a-brothers-lies/591420/61 "2011-08-07T03:31:36Z")

</div>

Update:

I confronted this guy about his stories today. I had been invited to a traditional Native American sweat lodge with him, which I had been very excited about, until he told me his stories, after which I started to dread seeing him again. I resolved that, before the sweat lodge, I would talk to him about what he said.

I sat him down privately and said: look, I want you to know that, even if everything you told me the other day is made up, I still respect you. Because I think you’re a good guy, a good friend, a good father, etc. I think that when you told me those stories, you were spinning some tall tales. And that’s ok. I just want you to know that even if none of that stuff ever happened, I would respect you for the guy I know you to be.

He acted kind of hurt that I didn’t believe him, and insisted to me that he had been telling me the truth about his supposed military adventures during Operation Just Cause.

Then I simply repeated what I said before. And he told me that he had been abused as a kid and that he was told by his father that he’d never amount to anything. I said, “don’t let anyone ever tell you that, because it’s not true. You are a great guy.” And he got very emotional and started to sort of cry, after I told him that.

He told me how glad he was to be my brother and friend. But he never admitted that he made up the stories and apologized.

Later I noticed he had a “USMC” tattoo on his arm. Frankly I don’t know how he explains that tattoo to people, especially to his own son. Hasn’t his son asked his father about his supposed service? There’s no way that he, as a genuine Marine, would _not_ think the story is totally unbelievable and absurd. Maybe he rationalizes the tattoo by saying he got it in honor of his son or his grandfather or something, but I don’t think that excuse would cut a lot of ice with actual servicemen.

The sweat lodge, by the way, was an unbelievable experience. It is something everyone should try once. I did it once before at summer camp as a teenager, but that was nothing compared to this session, which was put on by actual Native Americans (some of them were probably only a very small percentage Native, and I used to mock these type of people, but after tonight, I can say: if they really believe in the rituals, that’s enough.)

[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heartbroken-because-of-a-brothers-lies/591420.md?page=3)