# Heh. Father sues over sons "traumatized" by lesbian book **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 21, 2007, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110 "2007-04-21T21:50:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Der\_Trihs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/der_trihs/32/233_2.png) [@Der\_Trihs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Der_Trihs)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 5:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/41 "2007-04-24T05:00:11Z")
[QUOTE=chowder] One of my all time fave words that, “Wench”…brilliant 😃 [/QUOTE] Ever see the Far Side where there’s a warlord type on a throne, and a soldier in front of him is presenting him with a winch ? “No, bring me the _wench_ you fool ! The **wench**!” ---
**Author:** ![if6was9](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e47c2d/32.png) [@if6was9](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/if6was9)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/42 "2007-04-24T05:48:20Z")
Bentonville, AK… the world HQ for Wal\*Mart… is there something in the water down there? Will I catch teh xtian if I go there? ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 6:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/43 "2007-04-24T06:49:01Z")
[QUOTE=Electrical Storm] Mmm hmm. And we know\* that’s \* the first time ever that these fine, upstanding young men ever heard of them lez-bee-uns! How traumatic. [/QUOTE] When I first heard the following story, I thought it was a joke. > [@](#): > > A man walks into a bar and sits at the end, drinking drinks. A little while later, a gorgeous woman walks in and sits at the other end of the bar. She also occupies her time drinking drinks. The man gets up some courage and tells the bartender to give the lady a drink on his tab. The bartender says, “Hey, mister. You don’t want to waste your money on her.” > > Well, the man gets a bit upset over this. What? He’s not good enough for someone that pretty? So, he tells the bartender, “I know what I’m doing! Give her the drink.” The bartender does this and the woman waves thanks to him. > > After she finishes the drink, the man orders another one for her. The bartender tries again, “Mister, I’m telling you it’s a waste of your money. That lady’s a lesbian” The man tells the bartender to do what he’s told. So, the bartender says, “It’s your money, friend.” Then he gives the lady a drink. > > The man, by now a few drinks more courageous, saunters over to the lady, and says, “So, what part of Lesbia are you from?” The dude in the OP’s link must’ve been the man in this story. And he still hasn’t gotten over the embarassment! ---
**Author:** ![Rich\_Mann](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@Rich\_Mann](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rich_Mann)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 7:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/44 "2007-04-24T07:47:17Z")
That’s not the way I heard that joke. You got the PG version. ---
**Author:** ![chowder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/977dab/32.png) [@chowder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chowder)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/45 "2007-04-24T08:25:26Z")
[QUOTE=Der Trihs] Ever see the Far Side where there’s a warlord type on a throne, and a soldier in front of him is presenting him with a winch ? “No, bring me the _wench_ you fool ! The **wench**!” [/QUOTE] So the soldier trotted off and brought him a wrench 😃 ---
**Author:** ![A.R.Cane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ee7513/32.png) [@A.R.Cane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/A.R.Cane)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 10:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/46 "2007-04-24T10:57:52Z")
Leno picked up on this controversy. He quoted the father as saying that his boys couldn’t get to sleep’ Jay’s comment went something like: “Teenage boys, laying awake thinking of lesbians, imagine that.” It got a good laugh from his audience. ---
**Author:** ![Giles](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giles/32/60_2.png) [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/47 "2007-04-24T11:12:36Z")
[QUOTE=Justin\_Bailey] Possible, but if it’s a sex manual it was in the 613s somewhere. [/QUOTE] I just checked in a library catalogue, and indeed it should have been around 613.96 with the other sex manuals. I wonder what sort of information on military academies those fine boys were hoping to find in that section of the library. “Honest, Dad – I tried to type ‘military’ in their catalog, but my fingers slipped and typed ‘sex’ instead.” ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/48 "2007-04-24T13:15:34Z")
[QUOTE=Giles] I just checked in a library catalogue, and indeed it should have been around 613.96 with the other sex manuals. I wonder what sort of information on military academies those fine boys were hoping to find in that section of the library. “Honest, Dad – I tried to type ‘military’ in their catalog, but my fingers slipped and typed ‘sex’ instead.” [/QUOTE] Lesbians get a manual?!? I had to make do with Playboy Advisor and Penthouse Forum. Kids these days, sheesh. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/49 "2007-04-24T15:37:07Z")
> [@](#): > > Lesbians get a manual?!? Of course, after the manual, there are the orals. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/50 "2007-04-24T15:44:56Z")
[QUOTE=ShibbOleth] Lesbians get a manual?!? \ [/QUOTE] Well, how else are they supposed to pass the course? (Or **Shoshana’s** joke, which is funnier.) ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 3:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/51 "2007-04-24T15:52:00Z")
If the dad really thinks the kids were traumatized by seeing a lesbian sex manual (and there’s no chance that they were, let’s be real), imagine the mock and ridicule those kids are going to get from their peers for claiming to have gotten the vapors about it. If I had found out something like that about a classmate when I was 16, I’d have been stuffing girl-on-girl pages from porno mags in his locker every day. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/52 "2007-04-24T16:28:57Z")
> [@crazy Arkansas dad](#): > > The responsible adults in our community need to **ban together** and protect our children from the selfdestructive paths that have been paved by the immoral counterculture that dominates our legal and educational institutions. (emphasis mine) Typo at the paper, or clever wordplay from the dad? ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/53 "2007-04-24T16:46:19Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] (emphasis mine) Typo at the paper, or clever wordplay from the dad? [/QUOTE] Typo. I seriously doubt that man would be able to recognize, let alone use clever wordplay. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 4:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/54 "2007-04-24T16:50:33Z")
I don’t want to debate this. This isn’t the right place for it. I find it funny, though, that people rightly condemn silliness like this, but when someone claims emotional damage from hearing “under God” that case is given a respectful hearing around here. Strange, isn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/55 "2007-04-24T17:01:18Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Moto] I don’t want to debate this. This isn’t the right place for it. I find it funny, though, that people rightly condemn silliness like this, but when someone claims emotional damage from hearing “under God” that case is given a respectful hearing around here. Strange, isn’t it? [/QUOTE] I don’t find it strange actually. If you’re referring to the Newdow case, that involved daily teacher led recitations of the pledge which includes that phrase. I find that to be a different matter than the ‘accidental’ finding of a book. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/56 "2007-04-24T17:11:43Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Moto] I don’t want to debate this. This isn’t the right place for it. I find it funny, though, that people rightly condemn silliness like this, but when someone claims emotional damage from hearing “under God” that case is given a respectful hearing around here. Strange, isn’t it? [/QUOTE] Nobody claims that. The objections to Establishment Clause violations have nothing to do with any claim of “emotional damage” being done by merely hearing a religious expression. This is a total strawman. ---
**Author:** ![Ellen\_Cherry](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellen_cherry/32/3600_2.png) [@Ellen\_Cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellen_Cherry)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 5:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/57 "2007-04-24T17:14:11Z")
[QUOTE=Largo62] Lesbians? In a library? In Kentucky? Jeebus, whatever will we do?!!! I thought in Kentucky that they still thought the sun circles the earth. [/QUOTE] Respectfully, **Largo** knock it off. I’m sick of it, most Kentuckians are sick of it and if you have learned anything through your membership at Straight Dope, I would hope it’s that people of every level of IQ and education are found everywhere. It’s Arkansas in any case. ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/58 "2007-04-24T18:04:41Z")
[QUOTE=Ellen Cherry] Respectfully, **Largo** knock it off. I’m sick of it, most Kentuckians are sick of it and if you have learned anything through your membership at Straight Dope, I would hope it’s that people of every level of IQ and education are found everywhere. It’s Arkansas in any case. [/QUOTE] If you think that’s bad, think how awful it must be to be from Mississippi. Then imagine the joke I was about to tell on myself in my previous post, until I relieved the trauma I’d inflict on myself in telling it. I’ll leave that for others, thankyouverymuch.\* \*At least we don’t have any lezzzzbians in Mississippi though, or lesbian books, or books . . . . Aw, shucks, I went and did anyway. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/59 "2007-04-24T18:30:46Z")
[QUOTE=Mr. Moto] I don’t want to debate this. This isn’t the right place for it. I find it funny, though, that people rightly condemn silliness like this, but when someone claims emotional damage from hearing “under God” that case is given a respectful hearing around here. Strange, isn’t it? [/QUOTE] I don’t want to debate this here, either. Maybe you should start a new thread instead of plopping what you obviously know is a major hijack down in the middle of this one. ---
**Author:** ![Wee\_Bairn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/90db22/32.png) [@Wee\_Bairn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wee_Bairn)\ **Post date:** [April 24, 2007, 6:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110/60 "2007-04-24T18:42:39Z")
As a kid I scoured the stacks of photography and art books hoping to find the occasional bare nipple or love garden (it was the 70’s)- I can’t recall ever being successful. In Bentonville, Arkansas, the home of Wal-Mart, I could definitely see the 300’s through 600’s all being on the same shelf, unless the religion section falls in between. And yes, no knocking Kentucky, you guys grow some great pot there! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-father-sues-over-sons-traumatized-by-lesbian-book/401110.md?page=4)