# Heh. I'm such a guy. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 30, 2003, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807 "2003-07-30T02:14:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/21 "2003-07-31T01:08:46Z")
I knew I’d get called for actually cooking! > [@](#): > > More than 3 ingredients? That’s cooking. But are salt and lemon pepper actually “ingredients”? I mean, you just shake it on. Seasoning. If you count the garlic (open the jar, put some on the chicken), then that’s still only three ingredients – not _more than_ three. 😉 And I _did_ eat it over the stove out of the foil it was cooked in. ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 3:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/22 "2003-07-31T03:48:33Z")
Bleh, too decadent! Yesterday my dinner consisted of day-old cold pizza coated in butter. Oh, you wouldn’t imagine how good pizza tastes with butter spread on top! Next time I’ll try it with Crisco. YUM! Lunch usually consists of macaroni and cheese with tuna, barbecue and hot sauce all mixed together. Very good stuff. ---
**Author:** ![Moirai](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/96bed5/32.png) [@Moirai](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moirai)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 4:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/23 "2003-07-31T04:00:25Z")
But **Johnny** , you bake a mean birthday cake! Especially that one two years ago! And no, seasonings are not ingredients. Hey, have you moved yet? If so, how did you score another local Trader Joe’s? Probably planned it that way! 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Sinshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Sinshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sinshine)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/24 "2003-07-31T05:16:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Johnny L.A. \* > \*\*You have a _table?_ :eek: > > Wait a minute… Single? Female? Low-maintenance life-style? _Vancouver?_ How _you_ doin’? 😃 \*\* Yes, I have a table. And a dinner party’s worth of fine china and antique silver place settings. And table linens galore, very little of which I would _dare_ use when serving food, as it is all older than me. (Bring your own crystal.) So the setting of a mean table is not entirely beyond my resources, but I _do_ regard it as too much work for one person. Oh, I’m sorry, did you want to sit down? Well, let me stack up some pillows on my phone book for you. Don’t worry about me, I’ll sit on the couch… ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [July 31, 2003, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/25 "2003-07-31T11:32:22Z")
**EJsGirl** : No, I haven’t moved yet. I’m still angling for a desk at our Bothel, WA office. Extremely slim chance, but I have a good job and I need to explore all of the possibilities before I leave. I did call Trader Joe’s last week. I told them they needed a store in Bellingham, WA. It’s the largest city between Everett and the Canadian border and home to Western Washington University. Good population base for their kind of store. The nearest one to Bellingham is in Everett, about 30 miles away. I’ve heard they pay fairly well, and people who work there say they like it. I wouldn’t mind chucking the computer job for a job where I could wear jeans every day! So if anyone wants to ring Trader Joe’s and tell them they need a store in ZIP code 98225… 😃 Anyway, as long as I’m employed I thought I’d finish the restoration on the '66 MGB and pay for my new bike I got last Saturday. > [@](#): > > But **Johnny** , you bake a mean birthday cake! Especially that one two years ago! Heh. That _cake_ was pretty wacky. > [@](#): > > I’ll sit on the couch… You have a _couch?_ I have an army-surplus air mattress, and a big pillow I’ve propped up against a box of Two-Buck Chuck. ---
**Author:** ![Wyatt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/b19c9b/32.png) [@Wyatt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wyatt)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/26 "2003-08-01T01:18:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Violet \* > \*\*Garbanzo beans from – the – can are pretty good. Actually, very good! Some bachelorettes do this, too! \*\* ahhhhh… garbanzo Beans, God’s little protein pills! Sounds like we could _dine_ I note you’re in my same country! Wanna bite of condensed mushroom soup? > [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Jean Grey_ > **Mmmm… tuna from the can. Olives and pickles from the jar(s). A slice of American cheese. Maybe a flour tortilla. All standing in front of the fridge. Voila, dinner.** Now you’re talkin’ Gourmet! Ya actually have to have been to the grocery This Week to have tortillas! But grazing in front of the fridge, that’s Single Eating! ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/27 "2003-08-01T02:36:06Z")
> [@](#): > > Heh. That _cake_ was pretty wacky. That should have been “That [cake](http://pw1.netcom.com/~heliboy/cake.jpg) was pretty wacky.” In true guy fashion, I tend to eat things until they’re gone. I had the chicken again tonight. And yes, I ate it out of the foil and over the stove. More for lunch tomorrow. ---
**Author:** ![GingerOfTheNorth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/cdc98d/32.png) [@GingerOfTheNorth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GingerOfTheNorth)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/28 "2003-08-01T02:52:12Z")
**Sinshine** kids not. Guess who cooked while I was visiting last summer? When we were room-mates …mumblemumble… years ago, she lived on coffee, chocolate, and peanut butter. Mind you, she’s still thin, and my ass grew exponentially. ---
**Author:** ![Sinshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Sinshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sinshine)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/29 "2003-08-01T03:23:56Z")
**GingerOfTheNorth** , as you are well aware, I have since eschewed peanut butter. And my repertoire whilst living under your stairs _did_ include 3-minute noodles and kd. In my own defense, I am a marvellous cook, when inspired. I am just a little difficult to inspire. Okay, lots difficult. Speaking of **inspiring** though, my favourite dessert is **still** electric jello. 😃 **Johnny L.A.** , when you move to Washington, (Note the assumption! 😉 ) I will assist you in upgrading to Moroccan-style seating: _two_ big pillows propped against … okay, Canadian speaking here. What the h\*ll is “Two Buck Chuck,” and if it’s ground beef, **WHY** are you using it as furniture? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Sinshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Sinshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sinshine)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/30 "2003-08-01T03:25:38Z")
but **Ginger** , thanks for the compliment!!! ---
**Author:** ![Sejal\_Traurig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Sejal\_Traurig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sejal_Traurig)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 3:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/31 "2003-08-01T03:52:56Z")
Here is where I make all the other bachelor’s lifestyles seem positively PALE by comparison… I moved into a house almost one year ago… It had no appliances in it… To this day it has two 1. A washing machine 2. A Dryer Not even a microwave… 😛 Even the only refrigerator I own is at my store… Thats where I keep my condiments… There is another Foreman grill there too… Paper plates and plastic flatware… Don;t even need a dishwasher… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 12:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/32 "2003-08-01T12:25:50Z")
**Sinshine** : Actually, I think I’ll get a couch when I move to WA. (BTW: I’m toying with the idea of buying my **fiend** ’s house in Birch Bay if he moves to Nanaimo.) “Two-Buck Chuck” is the colloquial name for Charles Shaw wine. I think it’s made by Fetzer, who revived the label to dispose of their surplus grapes. It’s actually quite drinkable, and it only costs $1.98 for a 750ml bottle at Trader Joe’s. ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/33 "2003-08-01T14:42:18Z")
Why bother even bringing the stuff home? Just eat at the grocery store. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/34 "2003-08-01T16:08:10Z")
> [@](#): > > Why bother even bringing the stuff home? Just eat at the grocery store. Grocery stores don’t have TVs. ---
**Author:** ![1ofthegulls](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/1/bcef8e/32.png) [@1ofthegulls](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/1ofthegulls)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/35 "2003-08-01T16:49:40Z")
I’m proud that you FOLDED the foil and didn’t just toss it on the floor, next to the stove 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Caffeine.addict](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f475e1/32.png) [@Caffeine.addict](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Caffeine.addict)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/36 "2003-08-01T18:05:59Z")
I’m now married and have given up on some of the conveniences of the bachelor life, but I have a question for those of you who eat over the sink. How do you watch TV while you eat there? ---
**Author:** ![Mtgman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b5a626/32.png) [@Mtgman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mtgman)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/37 "2003-08-01T20:13:06Z")
I have a kitchen with a window which looks into the den. With a TV in the den I can stand at the sink and watch TV through the window. Enjoy, Steven ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/38 "2003-08-01T20:50:06Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lieu \* > \*\*Why bother even bringing the stuff home? Just eat at the grocery store. \*\* The groceries frown upon true bachelor eating, which is at the stove or just outside the microwave, in your underwear. A fork makes a handy and effective butt scratcher. ---
**Author:** ![Sejal\_Traurig](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Sejal\_Traurig](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sejal_Traurig)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/39 "2003-08-01T21:10:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lieu \* > \*\*Why bother even bringing the stuff home? Just eat at the grocery store. \*\* They wouldn’t let me plug in the George Foreman Grill :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![confessorknight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9a140/32.png) [@confessorknight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/confessorknight)\ **Post date:** [August 1, 2003, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807/40 "2003-08-01T21:11:49Z")
A fork?!? What kind of real Bachelor/Bachelorette uses Cutlery? Scoop it up with your bare hands and then get the Dog /Cat /Parakeet to lick them off. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/heh-im-such-a-guy/191807.md?page=3)