# hello "dopers" why do you post here **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 28, 2004, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434 "2004-09-28T04:54:35Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Triskadecamus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b19c9b/32.png) [@Triskadecamus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Triskadecamus)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/21 "2004-09-28T06:18:55Z")
I think we should get Ed to create “Gold Dong Member” classification. But I think it should be really expensive. Couple of hundred a year, at least, maybe more. Really. Tris ---
**Author:** ![t-keela](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a3d4f5/32.png) [@t-keela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/t-keela)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/22 "2004-09-28T06:20:01Z")
Did anybody notice that guy only used one comma in the whole thread. I think he needs to meet that other **non-hip** poster that we all loved so much. Between the two of them they might actually type something legible. Gold dongs? indeed :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/23 "2004-09-28T06:21:08Z")
> [@Already in Use](#): > > There isn’t enough gold in the world to goldplate MY dong! Nor enough to get me to let someone attach an electrode to mine. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/24 "2004-09-28T06:29:26Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > One thing I like very much about this board is that we try to spell, punctuate, and capitalize properly most of the time. > > Seriously, though, it’s an amazing community of _beaux esprits_… even many of the ones who don’t agree with me 🙂 And as we’re a hive mind, I agree with _everything_ Matt said. Now we will all chant: **One of us, one of us… gooble gobble** until you become one of the collective. ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/25 "2004-09-28T06:30:55Z")
> [@Triskadecamus](#): > > I think we should get Ed to create “Gold Dong Member” classification. > > But I think it should be really expensive. Couple of hundred a year, at least, maybe more. > > Really. > > Tris Does that mean for the low, low price of $5, the OP could have a primo Crysolite Cock Member classification? ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/26 "2004-09-28T06:32:01Z")
> [@hip onion](#): > > anyway its been real > > peas _Celery_. Back 'atcha. ---
**Author:** ![Already\_in\_Use](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/a9adbd/32.png) [@Already\_in\_Use](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Already_in_Use)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/27 "2004-09-28T06:38:22Z")
> [@Really Not All That Bright](#): > > Nor enough to get me to let someone attach an electrode to mine. Come on, man, live up to your username! Actually, I remember there was a guy in my physics class in high school who aimed a Tesla coil at his wiener. Not too smart, that one. ---
**Author:** ![t-keela](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a3d4f5/32.png) [@t-keela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/t-keela)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 6:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/28 "2004-09-28T06:54:49Z")
> [@Mockingbird](#): > > _Celery_. > > Back 'atcha. I was gonna say carrots. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Standup\_Karmic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ac91a4/32.png) [@Standup\_Karmic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Standup_Karmic)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 7:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/29 "2004-09-28T07:01:11Z")
> [@hip onion](#): > > so now redeem your board and tell me what is actually cool about it “Cool,” of course, is in the eye of the hipster making the judgement. Depending upon your interests and level of inquisitiveness, SDMB may or may not be for you. Lord knows, it’s not for everyone. (“Hello **Sisyphus’ Stone** and **nonpolar** , I’m looking in your directions.”) You may not find all the cool talk about how floor-licking, snot-hanging drunk you got last night (though you’ll probably find something of that order at some point). You may have a hard time getting anyone to seriously acknowledge you should you chOOz 2 n-gage n n3tsp33k (did I do that right? I’m not especially fluent). But you will be hard pressed – nay, completely flustered – to find another board on this 'Net with the depth and breadth of experience, knowledge, humour, intelligence, ingenuity, wit, charm, and candor that you will find here. Posts range from [outrageous](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=198659) to [touching](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=273959) and [gripping](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=190562) to [strangely amusing](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=202225). So, if you decide that you like us and want to stick around, we’ll probably be happy to have you. If not, we’re pretty much ok with that too. Of course, by “we”, I mean “me”, cuz 1m n0t ab0u7 7o sp33k 4 thees weerdoze. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 12:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/30 "2004-09-28T12:47:04Z")
On the contrary, I think this thread alone could be a test. If you can deal with the gold-plated dong jokes, the silliness, and the implications about the goats in other threads, you’re suited for us. If not, then bye-bye. > [@Solgrundy](#): > > I say we combine threads here (wtf lol omg!) to save space on the servers: > “Dopers: I Want To See A Picture Of Your Gold Dong Member.” All I have to say is: :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 2:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/31 "2004-09-28T14:35:49Z")
> [@OttoDaFe](#): > > But then you’d start getting (subtle) hints about becoming a _Platinum_ Dong Member (or is it _having_ a Platinum Dong member? I forget). > > For only a small extra fee, of course. . . . Nah. I want to jump the Platinum and go straight to being a _TITANIUM_ Dong Member! ---
**Author:** ![Sean\_Factotum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Sean\_Factotum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sean_Factotum)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/32 "2004-09-28T14:52:33Z")
> [@hip onion](#): > > anyway its been real > > peas Guys, I think we missed an opportunity to talk to e. e. cummings, as channelled through a WB soap opera cast-member! ---
**Author:** ![TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tellmei_mnotcrazy/32/3419_2.png) [@TellMeI\_mNotCrazy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TellMeI_mNotCrazy)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/33 "2004-09-28T15:02:28Z")
> [@Sean Factotum](#): > > Guys, I think we missed an opportunity to talk to e. e. cummings, as channelled through a WB soap opera cast-member! 😃 That was brilliant. ---
**Author:** ![Rufus\_Xavier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/eada6e/32.png) [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/34 "2004-09-28T15:29:54Z")
wy do i post here i do not know praps cuz the voices tell me so i shudnt rilly think too hard or fret about my girth i only have to tel myself i got my munnys wurth [the thread that ‘_redeem your board and tell me what is actually cool about it_’](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=268442) > [@](#): > > iampunha youre cool looks like iampunha’s got another sock puppet 😃 ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/35 "2004-09-28T15:58:27Z")
Well, my dear hip, savory friend, the boards aren’t cool because they’re “cool”, they’re cool because, for the most part, they are the way we like them. Is the SDMB for everybody? No. I think finding a “home board” is a lot like finding a real home. Some folks like big old farmhouses in the middle of nowhere. If that’s you, you’d be hard-pressed to convince a happy city dweller that living in the middle of nowhere is a _good_ thing. If you love NYC, you’d probably hate living in the country and vice versa. In short, I don’t think _we_ can convince you the SDMB is cool. The 30-day free trial is there so you can decide for yourself. If it’s not to your taste, there’s probably an MB somewhere on the 'net that is. Best of luck finding your niche! ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/36 "2004-09-28T16:07:29Z")
> [@norinew](#): > > Well, my dear hip, savory friend, the boards aren’t cool because they’re “cool”, they’re cool because, for the most part, they are the way we like them. Is the SDMB for everybody? No. I think finding a “home board” is a lot like finding a real home. Some folks like big old farmhouses in the middle of nowhere. If that’s you, you’d be hard-pressed to convince a happy city dweller that living in the middle of nowhere is a _good_ thing. If you love NYC, you’d probably hate living in the country and vice versa. > > In short, I don’t think _we_ can convince you the SDMB is cool. The 30-day free trial is there so you can decide for yourself. If it’s not to your taste, there’s probably an MB somewhere on the 'net that is. > > Best of luck finding your niche! This is \*way \* too reasonable and rational. Stop it. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/37 "2004-09-28T16:23:41Z")
> [@Elenia28](#): > > This is \*way \* too reasonable and rational. Stop it. Well, that’s the thing with them Ba’hai people. Always so darn agreeable… ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/38 "2004-09-28T16:35:08Z")
> [@hip onion](#): > > ok fair enuf your admin might need the cheddah to pay the bills but then i read the sticky saying that fun threads arent allowed cause they cost too much wtf Actually, I believe our admin need the cheddah to pay the _billz_. No one is going to take you seriously if you don’t make an effort to spell things correctly. Goodness me, no! ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/39 "2004-09-28T16:45:06Z")
> [@Triskadecamus](#): > > I think we should get Ed to create “Gold Dong Member” classification. > > But I think it should be really expensive. Couple of hundred a year, at least, maybe more. > > Really. > > Tris That might be a little steep for everybody. How about a $49.95 Plaster Caster Membership? ---
**Author:** ![photopat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/e95f7d/32.png) [@photopat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/photopat)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2004, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434/40 "2004-09-28T16:46:48Z")
As to why we post here, for me at least it’s the easiest way to get a daily dose of MST3K, Python and Pratchett references. Not to mention dongs. 😛 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/hello-dopers-why-do-you-post-here/266434.md?page=3)