Tacos. The only actual cooking involved is browning the ground beef, and you don’t need to worry about stuff like “doneness.”
I haven’t seen a rocket grill mentioned above, but I have a couple of George Forman grills and they’re spectacular for making grilled meats and vegetables. Slice a zucchini and onions and lay them on the grill — a few minutes later, grilled vegetables! Same with chicken breasts. You literally can cut things up, season a little, and smoosh them between the grill and have something edible.
CUTTING UP AN ONION:
- Slice lengthwise, from top to root
- Lay cut side down
- Make parallel slices roughly following the lines down to the root (but not all the way through)
- Chop through the other way, and you’ll have nice regular dices. If it’s a fat onion, slice once through the middle.
(I’m not sure if that’s clear, but again look at YouTube for chopping an onion and I’m sure it’ll be there.)
I taught myself to cook when I was in the Navy. I started from the same point you’re at.
I decided to learn to cook one thing - lasagna alfredo with broccoli. I chose that because there was a frozen version I liked and wanted to make it cheaper and (hopefully) better.
For a long time I continued to eat frozen and take out meals, but once every two weeks or so I’d make a lasagna. Eventually they became edible, so I started trying to make my own alfredo sauce instead of using jarred sauce. Once I had that figured out I began using other ingredients, like spinach and seafood. After a year or so I had really learned a lot, and made some wonderful (and some horrid) lasagnas.
So my advice is; pick one thing and make it over and over, and gradually make it more complicated.
You can learn how to do just about anything on YouTube nowadays. And it’s free! Or check out a cooking class. There are lots of great social ones.
I have a couple cookbooks like The 4 Ingredient Cookbook. While the big basics cookbooks like those previously mentioned are great, sometimes they’re complex recipes because they assume you want to make everything from scratch, no shortcuts. For most working people cooking on a weeknight for just 1 or 2, that’s just not practical. These easy recipes take advantage of things like canned soup for sauces.
It’s been so long, I had completely forgotten that I used to do exactly that 
What a great thread, I might even print it out for the ideas.
I feel for the OP. I’m now in my 50s and despite my mother teaching me a little cooking in my youth - I still don’t get it. I do not like cooking food. I do not enjoy cooking food. I really don’t even understand the nuances of cooking food.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve prepared countless meals over the years, firstly when flatting with others and laterally for our family. My teenagers even mostly eat what I place in front of them. 
These days it isn’t the chore it used to be but my skills are still pretty basic.
In my experience having enough of the right tools in the kitchen and cans/packets of ingredients in the pantry to enhance whatever is being cooked gives peace of mind. Staying in the kitchen is essential for me having burnt many pots over the years.
I didn’t learn much when I was a kid either. My mother didn’t really know how to cook real food, and neither did her mother. But her solution was to buy the powdered packets of “pasta sauce mix” or “chili mix” and follow the instructions. The pasta sauce mix is definitely better than the jars, trust me. And today there are tons of these kinds of packets that tell you exactly how to do it.
The first thing I learned on my own was lemon pepper chicken. Take some chicken (I do just breasts, skin off, boneless). Rub it on both sides with lemon pepper (it’s in the herb/spice isle). Cook on medium about 6-10 minutes each side - this can get tricky and you might have to cut one open to check if it’s done, which essentially makes all the juice run out, so this could take some trial and error.
Chicken salad is incredibly easy - canned chicken, mayo, salt, pepper to taste. For crunch add diced celery and/or green pepper. Basil is good in it too. But it’s trial and error. Everything we do is trial and error. One of the few things I can now do on my own is spaghetti with tomato sauce, and I just add spices until it tastes right.
The basics:
[ul]
[li]Pasta takes 10 minutes in boiling water, mac ‘n’ cheese takes less so keep an eye on it. Some suggest putting oil in the water so the pasta doesn’t stick together. But it also keeps the pasta from sticking to the sauce. I don’t recommend it and my pasta doesn’t stick together. But do put salt in the water.[/li][li]If an egg dropped in water floats, it’s bad. Good eggs sink.[/li][li]Pork is good with sage and rosemary. Those spices are also good with Italian food and steak.[/li][li]There are literally tons of frozen foods you can just stick in the oven - and these aren’t just foods that you heat up, but real foods, prepared but raw (chicken cordon bleu, chicken parmesan). Same goes for pre-seasoned veggies you can stick in the microwave.[/li][li]Watch Food Network, or the Cooking Channel.[/li][/ul]
Easy:
Get a George Foreman grill. You can cook all kinds of things in those. Chicken breasts, steaks, pork chops, anything that will fit.
Or a skillet. Pretty much any kind of fish is good sauteed in olive oil and white wine. Also scallops.
Get a vegetable steamer. One of those ones that goes inside a pot. A saucepan, I guess. Then you can steam fresh vegetables.
With those, and the ability to cook rice (easy), you can turn out a cheap, healthy, tasty meal in about 15 minutes.
Here’s a simple cut-boil-season type Indian recipe you can make, and eat with steamed rice or alone.
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Go to the market and buy: 1 packet frozen chopped spinach, 1 packet frozen chopped white/red onion, 1 packet frozen shredded coconut, 1 packet split chickpeas.
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Go to an Asian store and buy: 1 packet Indian seasoning (“masala”) powder.
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Back in the kitchen: throw a cup of split chickpeas in a flat-bottom pan, add 3 cups water. Bring to a boil on high heat. ETC 10 mins.
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Once the chickpeas are tender, throw in chopped spinach, chopped onion, some shredded coconut, 1-2 tsp seasoning powder, salt to taste, and bring to a boil. Be careful with the seasoning powder - they can be hot! ETC 15 mins.
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Once boiled and the spinach is cooked, it is ready to be drunk as a soup, or eaten with steamed rice. Delicious either way.
Super easy and delicious… um… thingies.
You’ll need a baking (cookie) sheet or some foil. A knife. A spoon or fork.
Preheat your oven to 325 or 350.
Ingredients
Crusty sourdough rolls
Cooked meat or a protein of some sort (pressed tofu should work, though I haven’t tried it)
Chopped vegetables, small pieces
Salad dressing (optional)
Shredded cheese
In a bowl, mix ingredients like cooked chicken (you can use stuff from a can), broccoli cut into small pieces (probably just want to use the tops for this), maybe a tablespoon or two of Italian dressing or any salad dressing you really like. Stir them together.
Take one or two crusty sourdough rolls. You could use other types of rolls, but nothing too soft. Cut into the top of the roll, not all the way through, but just enough so you can get your fingers in it. Scoop out some of the roll with your fingers to make a bread canoe. You can keep the bread crumbs, add them to the mixture in the bowl, or throw them out, depending on how adventurous you are.
Stuff the roll canoes with the mixture in the bowl. Top with cheese.
Put into the oven for a while. You want it to get hot through and for the veggies to soften and the cheese to melt and get brown.
I suggest a recipe like this because it’s easy, you can test out all different sorts of combinations of flavors without spending lots of money, you can practice chopping veggies a bit, and you get used to how to judge doneness in the oven. And the results are really tasty.
Now I wish I could steal eat them, but I can’t eated gluten any longer. Boo.
From For Men Only - A Cook Book by Achmed Abdullah and John Kenny, 1937:
The book is misogynistic as hell (I hope with tongue in cheek!), but has some handy hints and a few pretty good basic recipes.