# Help! Cardinal grammeters out of sync! Need answer fast! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 28, 2012, 4:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052 "2012-03-28T16:04:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2012, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/21 "2012-03-29T00:55:46Z")
Well there’s your problem. Without a working metapolar refractive pilfrometer you can’t get a good Styknosky number. And without an accurate Styknosky number you can’t know how much wire to attach to your Klemmer-Fholstrug unit. And I know you’re not even thinking about synching your cardinal grammeters without a properly wired KFU, because that would just be silly. ---
**Author:** ![Mister\_Rik](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mister_rik/32/491_2.png) [@Mister\_Rik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mister_Rik)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2012, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/22 "2012-03-29T16:07:49Z")
Everybody knows the solution is to reverse the polarity and reroute the signal through the deflector dish! ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2012, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/23 "2012-03-29T23:12:00Z")
lmao…that Google response led to a Youtube link…am I the only one that went to it? [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/2fjcJp_Nwvk/hqdefault.jpg "Rockwell Turbo Encabulator Version 2") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fjcJp_Nwvk) Edit…the sheer number of youtube videos on the Rockwell have me thinking we might have been double-whooshed? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [March 30, 2012, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/24 "2012-03-30T00:37:11Z")
You know, it occurred to me that we may be overthinking things. Just readjust the furshlugginer setting on the veeblefetzer by one potrzebie. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2012, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/25 "2012-03-31T01:02:39Z")
Dick. Haymes. ---
**Author:** ![Smeghead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f1d935/32.png) [@Smeghead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Smeghead)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2012, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/26 "2012-03-31T02:38:32Z")
Mornington Crescent! ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2012, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/27 "2012-04-02T18:27:53Z")
> [@Mister\_Rik](#): > > Everybody knows the solution is to reverse the polarity and reroute the signal through the deflector dish! For the 3rd Doctor is was simply reversing the polarity of the neutron flow. But then he didn’t have a dish. ---
**Author:** ![RalfCoder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f1d935/32.png) [@RalfCoder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RalfCoder)\ **Post date:** [April 2, 2012, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/28 "2012-04-02T18:39:01Z")
> [@RalfCoder](#): > > Sounds like a clear-cut case of Fibia Tibia to me. Last time that happen in my house, we had to reknurl every other klystron before we got things sorted out. Be careful, though, that you only knurl them in a clockwise direction, or you might have to cross the proton streams to get rid of the mess. Don’t listen to him. He knows NOTHING about grammeters. It’s all because your Bergenholm generators have been cross-circuited to B. ---
**Author:** ![compudog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/73ab20/32.png) [@compudog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/compudog)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/29 "2014-12-16T03:23:31Z")
I know it’s been some time since this initial post. Allow me to provide the necessary information to synchronize your Cardinal grammeters. You need to re-align the two spurving bearings with the semi-boloid slots to eliminate the side fumbling. Also, make sure the malleable logarithmic casing is in line with the panametric fan. The differential girdle spring must be on the “up” end of the grammeter. After that you should have synchronization. Hopefully this message makes it to you in time. I sent it using a temporal shift. ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/30 "2014-12-16T03:30:19Z")
> [@compudog](#): > > After that you should have synchronization. Hopefully this message makes it to you in time. I sent it using a temporal shift. I tried to send pretty much the same message, but it didn’t get through. Is it temporal shift “up”, or temporal shift “down”? ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/31 "2014-12-16T03:53:36Z")
Makes no diff. Temporal shift “down” moves it to 2012 via 2013; temporal shift “up” brings it to the same destination, except forward through the next Big Crunch/Big Bang event. It’s basically a trade-off between whether you have more time or energy on your hands. ETA: I _would_ be interested in learning if the OP ever tried the Dick Haymes solution, and if so, how it worked out. ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/32 "2014-12-16T21:17:52Z")
The place for all things metapolar, the discriminating buyer goes to: [liquidationchannel.com](http://liquidationchannel.com) - can’t beat tanzenite for metapolar applications ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2014, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/33 "2014-12-16T23:20:39Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > The place for all things metapolar, the discriminating buyer goes to: > > [liquidationchannel.com](http://liquidationchannel.com) - can’t beat tanzenite for metapolar applications Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birthday, Doctor Johnson! Happy Birthday to You! * * * “I’m sorry, Mr. Blucher… Would you like anything else?” _Long Pause_ “…For Instance…?” ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2014, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/34 "2014-12-17T15:43:54Z")
It’s not my birthday, but that cake looks scrumptious. I’ll have a large piece, please. ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 17, 2014, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052/35 "2014-12-17T18:01:44Z")
> [@Doctor\_Jackson](#): > > It’s not my birthday, but that cake looks scrumptious. I’ll have a large piece, please. lol. Sorry. AMC or TCM was running “The Bachelor and the Bobby Soxer” and the club scene with Cary Grant & Myrna Loy was running when I read this thread. Its still very funny, and since there’s no cake it’ll just have to do. 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-cardinal-grammeters-out-of-sync-need-answer-fast/617052.md?page=1)