# HELP! I've found my father and I'm terrified. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 20, 2003, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377 "2003-08-20T05:03:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Copper\_moon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecc23a/32.png) [@Copper\_moon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_moon)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/41 "2003-08-20T17:32:18Z")
(((((hyperJes))))) hugs to you. I know it’s tough, I’ve been where you are and it had a wonderful outcome. I’ll try not to make this too long but like your parents mine had a bitter divorce and when I was 14 my mom basically kidnapped me and my sister from my dad and took us several states away to Texas. My dad knew we were in Texas but that’s all. Now my mom made up all kinds of terrible, evil lies about my dad. They had a very small kernel of truth in them because I remember him hitting my mom and even growing pot in our basement to sell. All of that made an impression on me as a young girl and so I believed all her lies. Even later when I had to practice extreme self control to keep from hitting her myself and when she lied about everything else that she could lie about, it never dawned on me to rethink my feelings about my dad. (I’m not saying that your mom lied, but remember there are 2 sides to every story even though there is no excuse for hitting your wife) Anyway, my sis called my dad one day and then he called me. It was very scary but I will say that I didn’t have to keep the conversation going, he was thrilled with getting to know us and one thing lead to another and now I have a whole other family that I LOVE. We talked through all those days when he was very immature and he has since grown into a very father with 2 sons that are the best brothers in the world. I thought at first that it was good that we lived a 1000 miles from each other because it would be easy to avoid him if things weren’t great but now I wish he would move here. Just prepare yourself for the worst, that he either wants nothing to do with you or that he does but turns out to be a complete freak. Either way you will survive and won’t ever have to look at his face. But things just might go great. No matter what happens I don’t think you’ll regret finding out more. Besides he’s a police detective, right? I know there are no guarantees but that has to count for him having some decency, I would think. ---
**Author:** ![Copper\_moon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecc23a/32.png) [@Copper\_moon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_moon)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/42 "2003-08-20T17:35:47Z")
BTW, if you need some moral support or just want to talk feel free to email me. I can’t post much because the hampsters HATE me. It took 20 minutes just to get that last post in not including writing it. Good lick, Jes. ---
**Author:** ![Copper\_moon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecc23a/32.png) [@Copper\_moon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_moon)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/43 "2003-08-20T17:35:55Z")
BTW, if you need some moral support or just want to talk feel free to email me. I can’t post much because the hampsters HATE me. It took 20 minutes just to get that last post in not including writing it. Good luck, Jes. ---
**Author:** ![NotWithoutRage](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/22d042/32.png) [@NotWithoutRage](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NotWithoutRage)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/44 "2003-08-20T17:37:32Z")
Best of luck, Jess! ---
**Author:** ![Super\_Gnat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 5:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/45 "2003-08-20T17:40:21Z")
15 minutes. Good luck, **jes**. ---
**Author:** ![NurseCarmen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/5daacb/32.png) [@NurseCarmen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/NurseCarmen)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 8:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/46 "2003-08-20T20:51:21Z")
Wow, with all this build up, I suspect you’ll just get his voice mail 🙂 “Hi, this is Jes’s dad, I’m out of town for a month…” Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/47 "2003-08-20T21:19:43Z")
Update? Maybe he’s been on the phone with his dad for the past 3 1/2 hours!!! ---
**Author:** ![SnoopyFan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d07c76/32.png) [@SnoopyFan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnoopyFan)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/48 "2003-08-20T21:35:06Z")
Don’t leave us hangin **jes**! ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/49 "2003-08-20T23:44:35Z")
I’m dyin’ over here, **Jes** …how did it go?? ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2003, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/50 "2003-08-20T23:48:01Z")
Yes, **jes** , please let us know!! ---
**Author:** ![BooksWoods](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e0b2c6/32.png) [@BooksWoods](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BooksWoods)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/51 "2003-08-21T00:04:34Z")
You’ve also found two half-sisters, right? I’d be interested in that, too. ---
**Author:** ![Avarie537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/48db29/32.png) [@Avarie537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Avarie537)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/52 "2003-08-21T00:28:29Z")
Arg! Whole first page … no update … second page … she hasn’t posted yet! I hope everything went really well for you today, and you must let us know how the conversation went. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/53 "2003-08-21T01:47:46Z")
Ditto on the above … Hope everything is ok. Dying to know how things went. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 12:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/54 "2003-08-21T12:14:55Z")
Bump…c’mon **jes** , check in!! (Sorry for my earlier post calling you a “he” if you are indeed a “she.”) ---
**Author:** ![the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f1d935/32.png) [@the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Scarlet_Pimpernel)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/55 "2003-08-21T13:08:59Z")
**jes** , how’s it going? How did it go? {{{{{{ **jes** }}}}}} ---
**Author:** ![Aries28](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e36b37/32.png) [@Aries28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aries28)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/56 "2003-08-21T13:11:29Z")
Hope it went well. Makes me nervous not hearing anything back yet. {{{{{jes}}}}} ---
**Author:** ![Copper\_moon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecc23a/32.png) [@Copper\_moon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_moon)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/57 "2003-08-21T13:16:00Z")
**AAAAAIIIIIGGGGHHHH!!!** The suspense is killing me!!! ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/58 "2003-08-21T13:47:02Z")
i am really on pins and needles here, come on jes, pop in, you ok? ---
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/59 "2003-08-21T14:32:32Z")
I hope all went well, **jes**. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/60 "2003-08-21T16:20:53Z")
::::::::::;bump::::::::::::: Maybe she is trapped under something heavy and cannot reach her keyboard. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377.md?page=4)