# HELP! I've found my father and I'm terrified. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 20, 2003, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377 "2003-08-20T05:03:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Beadalin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3be4f8/32.png) [@Beadalin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beadalin)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/61 "2003-08-21T16:53:43Z")
Maybe that stupid virus took her offline. I was booted off for most of the day yesterday. ---
**Author:** ![October](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ac8455/32.png) [@October](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/October)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/62 "2003-08-21T16:56:44Z")
Maybe she called her father and it went 1) really well, or 2) really badly. Perhaps she’s just not ready to talk about it yet. However, Jes, when you check back in with us, we’re all dying of curiosity. The first thing I did this morning when I got to work, even before checking my email or getting my coffee, was check this thread. I know that however well or badly it went, you’re experiencing all sorts of mixed up emotions. We’re rooting for you. ---
**Author:** ![Gulo\_gulo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/bcef8e/32.png) [@Gulo\_gulo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gulo_gulo)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/63 "2003-08-21T19:38:50Z")
I’m quite curious, but also quite worried. I really hope you’re ok, **Jes**. Lots of good thoughts heading your way. ---
**Author:** ![HerMajestyLorna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/7cd45c/32.png) [@HerMajestyLorna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HerMajestyLorna)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/64 "2003-08-21T20:17:37Z")
I hope all is going well, **jes**! Lots of DoperLove headed your way. ---
**Author:** ![Shirley\_Ujest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/45deac/32.png) [@Shirley\_Ujest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shirley_Ujest)\ **Post date:** [August 21, 2003, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/65 "2003-08-21T23:09:13Z")
::::bump::: Dang, her email is anonymous. ---
**Author:** ![Latch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/f475e1/32.png) [@Latch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Latch)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/66 "2003-08-22T01:49:13Z")
Ahhhh… This is one of the worst "To Be Continued"s I’ve ever browsed in on… what happened??? ---
**Author:** ![Copper\_moon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecc23a/32.png) [@Copper\_moon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_moon)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/67 "2003-08-22T01:54:55Z")
Okay, now I’m worried. Surely if it had been good we would have heard by now. I hope nothing really devastating has happened. Am I being too pessimistic? ---
**Author:** ![ManDuh003](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/8491ac/32.png) [@ManDuh003](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ManDuh003)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/68 "2003-08-22T02:09:23Z")
This is making me crazy, I normaly lurk and never post but I need to know whats going on! **Jes** I hope everything is going well for you! ---
**Author:** ![hyperjes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df705f/32.png) [@hyperjes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hyperjes)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 4:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/69 "2003-08-22T04:58:36Z")
LOL I love you guys! Imagine, people dying for an update to _my_ silly, little life! Anyhow- It went well. 🙂 I did indeed get his voice mail at first. Then I called the regular number of the station he works at and begged for his cell or home number. Naturally, the guy working the phones wouldn’t give it to me. He tried to take a message, but I didn’t want to give my bio dad the option of not returning my call. So, being the slickster I like to think I am, I told phone-guy that it was an important family matter. Phone-guy said that he could try to reach him for me. So I gave him my phone # and told him that my name was/is Mrs. Blank. I knew my bio dad wouldn’t recognize my married name. My father called me back about 20 minutes later. It was a VERY long 20 minutes. I asked him if he had ever known a woman by the name of Blankity Blank. (My mom.) He said yes, so I told him who I was. He was pleased to hear from me. I was very relieved. We talked about lots of things, including some things I remembered from when I was little. He’s still married to the same woman that he married when I was in their wedding. Turns out that they have two kids, though not the two sisters my mom had told me about. They have a girl and a BOY. They are 14 and 17. MUCH younger than I’d expected. My half-siblings have always known about me, so it won’t be any shock to them. I was also pleasantly surprised to find out that they have many of the same hobbies that I did at their age. Genetics are weird. My grandma, who I also remember, is still alive. My father said that she would be very happy to hear about me. When we had run out of questions for each other (temorarily, anyhow), we exchanged addresses and email addys. I got an email from him today, just verifying the address and saying that he was glad to hear from me. I replied and sent him some of our wedding pictures. I’m sorry that I didn’t get back to you all sooner. It took me quite a while to process everything. Then my mom and both of my brothers (the ones I’ve grown up with) called to make sure I was okay. I was pretty exhausted when all was said and done, so I went to bed early. I’m glad that it came out okay. Hopefully, I’ll get to meet him and his family in person someday. Thank you so much for the support that everyone gave me. It helped more than you could know. ---
**Author:** ![Cosmopolitan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/94ad74/32.png) [@Cosmopolitan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cosmopolitan)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/70 "2003-08-22T05:02:29Z")
I’m so glad that it went well! Hopefully y’all can develop some sort of relationship in the future, if that’s what everyone wants. ---
**Author:** ![hyperjes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df705f/32.png) [@hyperjes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hyperjes)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 5:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/71 "2003-08-22T05:06:03Z")
I think we will probably stay in touch. He mentioned that he hoped it wouldn’t be our last conversation, so that bodes well. I’d love to meet my half-sibs, too. ---
**Author:** ![Mama\_Tiger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/6de8d8/32.png) [@Mama\_Tiger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mama_Tiger)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/72 "2003-08-22T05:07:38Z")
I’m really glad it went so well for you, **jes!** And thanks for updating us – like so many other Dopers, apparently I have no life of my own and need to live vicariously through yours. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![j\_sum1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/8baadc/32.png) [@j\_sum1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j_sum1)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/73 "2003-08-22T06:11:03Z")
Way to go **jes**!!! That’s fantastic.😃 😃 😃 ---
**Author:** ![hyperjes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/df705f/32.png) [@hyperjes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hyperjes)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 8:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/74 "2003-08-22T08:20:51Z")
🙂 You guys are so nice! ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 10:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/75 "2003-08-22T10:55:15Z")
I’m glat it went well, **jes**. CJ ---
**Author:** ![kellibelli](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e480ec/32.png) [@kellibelli](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kellibelli)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 11:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/76 "2003-08-22T11:09:52Z")
BAH! now i am at work, all teared up, sheesh. This really got me “My half-siblings have always known about me”… i said AWWWWWWWW right here at my desk. Grats Jes, best possible outcome, this will be a happy thing, i have no doubt. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f1d935/32.png) [@the\_Scarlet\_Pimpernel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/the_Scarlet_Pimpernel)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 11:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/77 "2003-08-22T11:43:33Z")
Im so happy for you, I hope it continues to go well. Even though it’s really none of my business, I would love to hear any updates on how things go. ---
**Author:** ![ivylass](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/9de053/32.png) [@ivylass](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ivylass)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 12:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/78 "2003-08-22T12:08:50Z")
Heaving a huge sigh of relief!! Your half-siblings know about you…that’s spectacular. Enjoy getting to know your natural father. If I may, in your joy in meeting your dad, please remember the feelings of the parents who raised you. Reassure them that they had all the hard work and how much you appreciate them. Your kids have three granddads. How cool is that! ---
**Author:** ![Copper\_moon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecc23a/32.png) [@Copper\_moon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Copper_moon)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/79 "2003-08-22T12:11:49Z")
Oh how wonderful! GREAT NEWS! I’m so glad things went well and that is immpressive that he told his other kids about you. Genetics are weird. My 16 year old half brother is just like me and my 12 year old half brother is just like my sis. Looks, personality, everything. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [August 22, 2003, 1:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377/80 "2003-08-22T13:11:00Z")
Woohoo! Regardless of whether you keep in touch in the future, at least you did it - you won’t be beating yourself up about not daring to do this. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-ive-found-my-father-and-im-terrified/196377.md?page=5)