# Help me be all cool and ass-kicky **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 24, 2003, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553 "2003-07-24T04:32:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2003, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/81 "2003-07-26T02:47:19Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Topaz \* > \*\*Fedora coming next! If I could figure out what the hell it is…😉 \*\* One fedora coming right up. Yarrrr, how’d this parrot crap get on my shoulder?! Where’s that damn shaved cat?! ---
**Author:** ![StanDup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@StanDup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StanDup)\ **Post date:** [July 26, 2003, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/82 "2003-07-26T16:30:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by js\_africanus \* > \*\*One fedora coming right up. Yarrrr, how’d this parrot crap get on my shoulder?! Where’s that damn shaved cat?! \*\* Ahhh… That IS cool! ---
**Author:** ![js\_africanus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/87869e/32.png) [@js\_africanus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/js_africanus)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/83 "2003-08-04T20:16:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Topaz \* > \*\*I want to learn how to be so cool that I make people amazed at me. \*\* How has your peer group responded to the mickey mouse pants? Are they jaw droppingly amazed at your coolness, or do we still have work to do? ---
**Author:** ![Teegus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Teegus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Teegus)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2003, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/84 "2003-08-04T22:21:23Z")
You could try growing a dirty goatee and long dark hair that you never wash. Also hang around with four or five midgets, a really effeminate guy and an old guy wearing a grey dress. And carry around a big sword. In case you get something stuck in your teeth… 😃 It worked for Aragorn anyways. YMMV ---
**Author:** ![StanDup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@StanDup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StanDup)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2003, 8:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/85 "2003-08-05T08:28:15Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by js\_africanus \* > \*\*How has your peer group responded to the mickey mouse pants? Are they jaw droppingly amazed at your coolness, or do we still have work to do? \*\* I think I may have started a new fad with those pants. Seriously.😃 ---
**Author:** ![SkyBum](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a88e57/32.png) [@SkyBum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkyBum)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2003, 12:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/86 "2003-08-05T12:30:08Z")
I’d like to vote for this as one of the more notable thread titles I’ve seen. ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2003, 11:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/87 "2003-10-13T11:10:57Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by Kn_ckers \* > \*\*P.S.: I love your username, **Topaz**. It’s sparkly. 🙂 \*\* I wonder if she was irradiated, or is naturally that brilliant color?? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![cherry](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/da6949/32.png) [@cherry](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cherry)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2003, 2:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/88 "2003-10-13T14:42:43Z")
Sorry I cant see your pictures, so I’m just going to give you one take. Wear some leather pants, skull cap, a little bit of black eyeliner, motorcycle or steel toe boots, a Nehru type linen shirt in white, jean or corduroy jacket, there you cool a cool outfit, but I don’t know how to be cool… ass kicky… I imagine steel toe boots hurt when you kick someone’s ass. Oh yeah a motorcycle helps for the cool factor, but then i’d recommend, good full leathers, alpine star boots, a nice bright helmet, gloves and rubber side up! ---
**Author:** ![Soup\_du\_jour](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@Soup\_du\_jour](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Soup_du_jour)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2003, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/89 "2003-10-14T05:49:40Z")
Big red leather trenchcoat. That’s all I’m going to say. ---
**Author:** ![StanDup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@StanDup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StanDup)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2003, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/90 "2003-10-14T22:39:44Z")
Wow. Never thought this thread would come up again. 🙂 Well, I’ve just finished **cherry** ’s request, and I’m about to start **Soup\_du\_jour** ’s. Here it is: [http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2003-7/298460/SkullMe.jpg](http://img.villagephotos.com/p/2003-7/298460/SkullMe.jpg) Very, Very Hastily, Topaz ---
**Author:** ![Ryle\_Dup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Ryle\_Dup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ryle_Dup)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2003, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/91 "2003-10-14T23:00:39Z")
Please don’t kicky my ass ☹ ---
**Author:** ![StanDup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@StanDup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StanDup)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2003, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553/92 "2003-10-14T23:05:23Z")
Nah, I’d rather do other things. 😉 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-be-all-cool-and-ass-kicky/190553.md?page=4)