# Help me become an influencer **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 21, 2021, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358 "2021-03-21T18:48:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/1 "2021-03-21T18:48:32Z")
Are you born an influencer, like Kendall Jenner? Or is it something that can be taught, like racism? Teach me. I am your lump of clay. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/2 "2021-03-21T18:57:19Z")
Are you naturally shallow? Or are you willing to work long and hard to become self-centered? If you were seriously considering it, I’d say “Omigaaaaah, run away! Now! Fast!” But I’ll shut up and let those who understand “influencerness” chime in… ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/3 "2021-03-21T19:46:25Z")
Just … be yourself. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/4 "2021-03-21T19:48:14Z")
I’m already doing that. And I can’t even influence my dog. ---
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/5 "2021-03-21T19:55:03Z")
If you had what it took to be an influencer you would not need to ask. You would be explaining it to us. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/6 "2021-03-21T20:01:27Z")
Maybe losing the big red “L” would be a good place to start. ---
**Author:** ![TheGunIsMightierThanThePen](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thegunismightierthanthepen/32/2981_2.png) [@TheGunIsMightierThanThePen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheGunIsMightierThanThePen)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/7 "2021-03-21T20:06:20Z")
Take whatever you’re doing now, and do the opposite of that. ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/8 "2021-03-21T20:14:33Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > I’m already doing that. And I can’t even influence my dog. I hear ya. I had the same problem (dog was very smart – a Bernese Mountain Dog, a breed rated very high in intelligence). Fortunately I hired a trainer who taught me all kinds of techniques and tips. It was basically like one of those management “leadership” courses, except the entities being managed and who need to look up to you as a leader were not employees, but dogs – or in my case, one dog. It more or less worked in many respects. Try it. As for influencing humans, I gave up on that a long time ago. Everyone I’ve seen who is good at it is not someone I would ever want to even remotely try to emulate. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/9 "2021-03-21T20:20:48Z")
Influencers generally influence me to run the other way. ---
**Author:** ![pjd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pjd/32/3009_2.png) [@pjd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pjd)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/10 "2021-03-21T20:27:39Z")
Then I’m afraid you’re going to have to be someone else. ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/11 "2021-03-21T20:33:30Z")
It was a joke; I used to be a dog trainer 😜 ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/12 "2021-03-21T20:33:53Z")
Explain ---
**Author:** ![wolfpup](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpup/32/10618_2.png) [@wolfpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolfpup)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/13 "2021-03-21T20:36:36Z")
> [@lissener](#): > > It was a joke; I used to be a dog trainer 😜 My joke was a response to your joke. Where that leaves us, I don’t know. But in every good joke there is a grain of truth. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![markn\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f9ae1b/32.png) [@markn\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/markn_1)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/14 "2021-03-21T20:45:10Z")
I’ve never even heard of Kendall Jenner, so I guess she failed to influence me. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/15 "2021-03-21T20:56:24Z")
> [@wolfpup](#): > > Everyone I’ve seen who is good at it is not someone I would ever want to even remotely try to emulate. ^This is the bottom line. Influencers are shallow people who will shill anything for a dollar. If you have no pride and will whore yourself out for a dollar then try to be an ‘influencer’. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/16 "2021-03-21T20:57:16Z")
> [@markn\_1](#): > > I’ve never even heard of Kendall Jenner, so I guess she failed to influence me. Have you ever heard of Bruce Jenner? ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/17 "2021-03-21T21:02:47Z")
Not sure if that was just an oops or you intended to be transphobic? ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/18 "2021-03-21T21:03:56Z")
Thanks for those invaluable tips, Ike! I think I already have those traits tho. Any more? ---
**Author:** ![Si\_Amigo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/si_amigo/32/2877_2.png) [@Si\_Amigo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Si_Amigo)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/19 "2021-03-21T21:42:59Z")
Do you also have a big red L on your forehead too? For Loser. [![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/YgSPaXgAdzE/maxresdefault.jpg "Beck - Loser (Official Music Video)") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YgSPaXgAdzE) ---
**Author:** ![lissener](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lissener/32/6139_2.png) [@lissener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lissener)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2021, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358/20 "2021-03-21T22:25:09Z")
Not what it means but thanks for the trip down memory lane to a middle school playground! [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-become-an-influencer/938358.md?page=2)