# Help me find my clothes **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 20, 2005, 10:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270 "2005-07-20T10:47:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/61 "2005-07-21T00:32:30Z")
> [@laina\_f](#): > > How’s that workin’ for ya? Fine, for 18 months. Goddamit, these jeans are working for some undercover female maternal agent, aren’t they? ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/62 "2005-07-21T00:36:27Z")
> [@GorillaMan](#): > > I don’t want the privacy of my jeans to be compromised Privacy of your jeans!? What about my camera? It was a nice camera. A Polaroid Spectra. Your damn jeans ate it. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/63 "2005-07-21T01:02:57Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Privacy of your jeans!? What about my camera? It was a nice camera. A Polaroid Spectra. > > Your damn jeans ate it. :mad: Yeh, that sports bra was new and all; ladies, you know a good one’s not cheap. And it’s out there being violated by your trousers! Its reputation’s forever besmirched. Clearly, your jeans are a menace, a menace I say! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![VegemiteMoose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/df788c/32.png) [@VegemiteMoose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VegemiteMoose)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/64 "2005-07-21T04:35:02Z")
Don’t worry **GorillaMan** , I’ve put out the [alert](http://tinypic.com/9749ed.jpg) for your missing jeans. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2005, 6:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/65 "2005-07-21T06:59:29Z")
> [@VegemiteMoose](#): > > Don’t worry **GorillaMan** , I’ve put out the [alert](http://tinypic.com/9749ed.jpg) for your missing jeans. Thank you - surely they’ll be found within hours! ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2005, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/66 "2005-08-05T23:03:53Z")
Have you found your jeans yet, **GorillaMan**? ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2005, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/67 "2005-08-05T23:14:51Z")
I kinda like the idea of **Gorilla Man** without his trousers. heh. ---
**Author:** ![rayh](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e79b87/32.png) [@rayh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rayh)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2005, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/68 "2005-08-05T23:29:24Z")
Have you searched systematically? Throw everything out of your house that is not your jeans, what’s left must be your jeans. Problem solved. ---
**Author:** ![Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a8b319/32.png) [@Spatial\_Rift\_47](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spatial_Rift_47)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2005, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/69 "2005-08-05T23:31:01Z")
I thought I saw your jeans, **GorillaMan** , but it was just a roving gang of khakis. damn khakis, assaulting old ladies grumble grumble vicious hooligans mumble mumble … ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2005, 11:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/70 "2005-09-15T23:33:31Z")
**GM** , I don’t know if your jeans ever returned from their walkabout, but would ya’ll believe my white sports bra has been found?? It had enjoyed an extended holiday behind the dryer, hanging out and going native w/ the dust bunnies. It has a strange new tattoo I’m afraid to ask about (a Mexican cutie, I believe) and needed a very thorough scrubbing; I have no idea what it got up to back there, but I suspect my bra earned quite the naught reputation. I found it when I went looking for my green finger tip towel; it appeared to have taken one of my ankle socks w/ it as a valet or something. ---
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/71 "2005-09-16T02:47:57Z")
Were they made of wool? If so, you might want to ask **Hal**. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/72 "2005-09-16T06:22:37Z")
Good for you, **Portia**!! Alas, the prodigal jeans are still unaccounted for. I worry for them, with the nights drawing in and the days getting colder…soon, food will be scarce, and they will really find it tough. Unless, that is, they’ve found a caring new home. We can only hope. ---
**Author:** ![GorillaMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/50afbb/32.png) [@GorillaMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GorillaMan)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 6:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/73 "2005-09-16T06:26:39Z")
Oh, and before somebody links to [this thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=334647), they _are_ prodigal…the must’ve stolen my credit card, because there’s no other way I could’ve spent so much money over the summer. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Nawth\_Chucka](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c57346/32.png) [@Nawth\_Chucka](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nawth_Chucka)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 11:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/74 "2005-09-16T11:31:44Z")
> [@GorillaMan](#): > > Good for you, **Portia**!! > > Alas, the prodigal jeans are still unaccounted for. I worry for them, with the nights drawing in and the days getting colder…soon, food will be scarce, and they will really find it tough. Unless, that is, they’ve found a caring new home. We can only hope. I shudder to think what you were feeding your jeans. ---
**Author:** ![Angua](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8baadc/32.png) [@Angua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Angua)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 12:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/75 "2005-09-16T12:35:38Z")
> [@Portia](#): > > I shudder to think what you were feeding your jeans. Must keep straight face. _snigger_ ---
**Author:** ![ioioio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ioioio/32/316_2.png) [@ioioio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ioioio)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/76 "2005-09-16T13:02:01Z")
Thanks for the update, **GorillaMan**. Please let us know if/when the jeans ever show up. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 1:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/77 "2005-09-16T13:10:52Z")
> [@Portia](#): > > I shudder to think what you were feeding your jeans. My Polaroid, I would guess, which still hasn’t turned up. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 1:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/78 "2005-09-16T13:18:04Z")
Mrs. Murphy gave a party just about a week ago. Everything was plentiful, The Murphys, they’re not slow. They treated us like gentlemen, we tried to act the same, If it weren’t for what happened…Well, it was a doggone shame. When Mrs. Murphy dished the chowder out, she fainted on the spot. She found a pair of overalls at the bottom of the pot. McGinty, he got roaring mad, his eyes were bulging out, He jumped onto the piano and loudly he did shout… “Who threw the overalls in Mrs. Murphy’s chowder?” Nobody spoke, so he shouted all the louder, “It’s a Irish trick that’s true, I can lick the Mick that threw The overalls in Mrs. Murphy’s chowder.” I love the Bing Crosby version. ---
**Author:** ![marque\_elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/71c47a/32.png) [@marque\_elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marque_elf)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/79 "2005-09-16T15:32:12Z")
**Gorillaman** and **Aanimika** , let me introduce my self and the service I can provide. I an\*\* marque elf, finder of lost personal items\*\*… I’ve got a card I can show you somewhere around here…Oh, here it is. My fees are quite reasonable and my discretion is guaranteed. For a suitable retainer, I’ll get right on the case. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2005, 3:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270/80 "2005-09-16T15:40:46Z")
> [@marque elf](#): > > **Gorillaman** and **Aanimika** , let me introduce my self and the service I can provide. I an\*\* marque elf, finder of lost personal items\*\*… I’ve got a card I can show you somewhere around here…Oh, here it is. My fees are quite reasonable and my discretion is guaranteed. For a suitable retainer, I’ll get right on the case. What’s the retainer? I don’t have much money, how about some gunk under my desk? No? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-find-my-clothes/313270.md?page=5)