# Help me pick a new middle name. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [May 14, 2012, 4:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898 "2012-05-14T16:17:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/21 "2012-05-14T19:12:17Z")
> [@Leaffan](#): > > What’s the point in changing a name no one uses or hears? > ( **Or do you plan on assassinating someone**?) Well, then Wayne would be the best possible name! ---
**Author:** ![grama](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7cd45c/32.png) [@grama](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/grama)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 7:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/22 "2012-05-14T19:28:47Z")
What about droping the middle name altogether? ---
**Author:** ![MysteryFellow63427](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e4f/32.png) [@MysteryFellow63427](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MysteryFellow63427)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/23 "2012-05-14T19:29:47Z")
Try one of the great foods of the world: John “Bacon” Smith Vito “Calzone” Mancini Harold “Pretzel” Jones Frank “Dorito” O’Riley I think you’ll agree these are all unforgettable. But there are many more to choose from; the world’s your oyster. ---
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/24 "2012-05-14T19:36:45Z")
Michael is a good, all-purpose name. It goes with almost everything, everyone knows how to spell it and pronounce it, and it’s not ludicrous. ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/25 "2012-05-14T20:13:53Z")
How about “The?” Alfred The Great and Atilla The Hun swear by it. ---
**Author:** ![Taomist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@Taomist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Taomist)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 8:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/26 "2012-05-14T20:20:44Z")
I chose my husband’s last name to be my middle name when we got married; if your wife’s maiden name is do-able, it might be an option. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![PandaBear77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/edb3f5/32.png) [@PandaBear77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PandaBear77)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/27 "2012-05-14T23:12:08Z")
Quinn Steven Vincent David Samuel ---
**Author:** ![sisu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@sisu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sisu)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2012, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/28 "2012-05-14T23:41:12Z")
Marion? ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 12:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/29 "2012-05-15T00:12:57Z")
Why don’t you give us some to choose from? Do you have some names you like? ---
**Author:** ![Munch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/munch/32/5281_2.png) [@Munch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Munch)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/30 "2012-05-15T01:46:28Z")
We’d be remiss not to mention Barney Stinson’s suggestion: Wait For It (Waitforit?) As in John “Wait For It” Smith. ---
**Author:** ![Blkshp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blkshp/32/7135_2.png) [@Blkshp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blkshp)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 1:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/31 "2012-05-15T01:54:39Z")
Danger or Trouble. ---
**Author:** ![ZenBeam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/3ab097/32.png) [@ZenBeam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZenBeam)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/32 "2012-05-15T02:05:26Z")
How about World? Let’s you keep your initials. If your current name is Meta Wayne Peace, though, nevermind… This is a long shot, but have you considered keeping your first name as your middle name, and getting a new first name? Lot’s of people go by their middle name, so you wouldn’t have to have people change what they call you. Other W names that can make good middle names would be Walter, William, or Wallace. ---
**Author:** ![Enola\_Gay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/3ab097/32.png) [@Enola\_Gay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enola_Gay)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/33 "2012-05-15T02:33:44Z")
Cecil ---
**Author:** ![Capt\_Kirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@Capt\_Kirk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Capt_Kirk)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/34 "2012-05-15T02:48:32Z")
> [@Enola\_Gay](#): > > Cecil Bucket of fish(just imagine a drummer playing that)😃 ---
**Author:** ![jasg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f0a364/32.png) [@jasg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jasg)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/35 "2012-05-15T03:43:13Z")
> [@Hypno-Toad](#): > > How about “The?” Alfred The Great and Atilla The Hun swear by it. So does Smokey… Seriously, I’ll share mine - “Galen”. Sort of ties with surgery nicely. ---
**Author:** ![MegaBee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f0a364/32.png) [@MegaBee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MegaBee)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 1:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/36 "2012-05-15T13:48:39Z")
> [@jasg](#): > > So does Smokey… > > Seriously, I’ll share mine - “Galen”. Sort of ties with surgery nicely. Is it nitpicking to point out that the fire prevention awareness bear is named Smokey Bear, not Smokey the Bear? ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 2:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/37 "2012-05-15T14:26:26Z")
Something short and stern: Karl Leon Curt Duke Hunt (but not if your first name is Mike) ---
**Author:** ![Missy2U](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/3bc359/32.png) [@Missy2U](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Missy2U)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/38 "2012-05-15T16:52:46Z")
Edward? Craig? Timothy? Matthew? That’s all I got. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/39 "2012-05-15T19:10:04Z")
What kind of personal quality would you best like to cultivate (or cultivate the perception of)? Do you want people to associate you in their minds as a helpful person? I mean how cool would it be if you could very accurately tell people “_‘Helpfulness’ is my Middle Name_”? Do you have an area of expertise you’re particularly proud of? For instance, knowledge about propane grills. People would say “_If you want to know anything about gas grills, just ask **It’s Not Rocket Surgery**. ‘Gas Grills’ is his middle name!_” You’d get invited to all the best barbecues this summer. Of course, the downside is that you’d probably get stuck with tending to the steaks, so be careful. ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2012, 7:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898/40 "2012-05-15T19:20:22Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > What kind of personal quality would you best like to cultivate (or cultivate the perception of)? Do you want people to associate you in their minds as a helpful person? I mean how cool would it be if you could very accurately tell people “_‘Helpfulness’ is my Middle Name_”? > > Do you have an area of expertise you’re particularly proud of? For instance, knowledge about propane grills. People would say “_If you want to know anything about gas grills, just ask **It’s Not Rocket Surgery**. ‘Gas Grills’ is his middle name!_” You’d get invited to all the best barbecues this summer. > > Of course, the downside is that you’d probably get stuck with tending to the steaks, so be careful. That’s it! I’m knowledgeable about horse racing. “Ask Rocket! His middle name is “Degenerate”.” 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-middle-name/621898.md?page=3)