# Help me pick a new name
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [April 21, 2019, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858 "2019-04-21T16:46:39Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/1 "2019-04-21T16:46:39Z")
Now that I am officially divorced, I need a new name as part of my new “me”.
The options I’ve come up with are
Scoot’sDad
DorkVader
Chaz The Great and Powerful
---
### Author:  [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/2 "2019-04-21T16:51:34Z")
Glurg, forgot to say, poll closes after 4 days, highest number of votes will be primary with the other two secondary when I submit my petition for a name change
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### Author:  [@Alpha\_Twit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alpha_Twit)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/3 "2019-04-21T17:25:49Z")
Really needs a “None of the above” poll option.
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### Author:  [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/4 "2019-04-21T17:30:39Z")
You could buy a membership and change your name to **memberchaz** …
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### Author:  [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/5 "2019-04-21T17:38:53Z")
I vote for “Glurg”.
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### Author:  [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/6 "2019-04-21T17:48:06Z")
Dork Vader’s Dad
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### Author:  [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 6:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/7 "2019-04-21T18:05:21Z")
Scoot’s Great And Powerful Dork.
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### Author:  [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/8 "2019-04-21T19:00:31Z")
‘Chazzie’ is what I choose.
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### Author:  [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/9 "2019-04-21T19:11:00Z")
The lil’wrekkers saying ‘chazzieboi’ would be cool.
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### Author:  [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/10 "2019-04-21T20:04:54Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#):
>
> ‘Chazzie’ is what I choose.
Uh, no, and tell lil’wrekker not _just_ no…
Scoot’sDad isn’t my favorite **kaylasdad** cause, it’s too similar to your’s, but I do like it. I haven’t ever bought a membership because I haven’t ever felt the need to, nothing has changed in that regard.
Glurg is an Onomatopœia, I was taking a drink of coffee when I realized my error, so no although it would make a funny name.
I did consider Dork Vader’s Dad, but Scoot is pretty young and more into Kylo Wren (wrin, ren, rin?)
\*\*Darren \*\* uh, Scoot is my 10 year old son aaaand aaaahhh your suggestion is aaah a _liiitle_ … uh, just nope.
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### Author:  [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/11 "2019-04-21T21:04:43Z")
Honestly, none of them.
I vote keep thinking.
mmm
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### Author:  [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/12 "2019-04-21T21:16:34Z")
> [@guestchaz](#):
>
> Uh, no, and tell lil’wrekker not _just_ no…
>
> Scoot’sDad isn’t my favorite **kaylasdad** cause, it’s too similar to your’s, but I do like it. I haven’t ever bought a membership because I haven’t ever felt the need to, nothing has changed in that regard.
>
> Glurg is an Onomatopœia, I was taking a drink of coffee when I realized my error, so no although it would make a funny name.
>
> I did consider Dork Vader’s Dad, but Scoot is pretty young and more into Kylo Wren (wrin, ren, rin?)
>
> \*\*Darren \*\* uh, Scoot is my 10 year old son aaaand aaaahhh your suggestion is aaah a _liiitle_ … uh, just nope.
Aw man. I’ve been robbed. How about letters; GCZ? I really like ‘guestchaz’ better than the others, plus I don’t like changes.
(Yea, yea I know it’s not all about me:))
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### Author:  [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/13 "2019-04-21T21:32:41Z")
> [@guestchaz](#):
>
> Scoot is pretty young and more into Kylo Wren
\*It’s a plane!
No, it’s a bird!
It’s **Kylo Wren!!** \*
Another vote for ‘keep trying’’ here. 🙂
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### Author:  [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/14 "2019-04-21T21:47:13Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#):
>
> Aw man. I’ve been robbed. How about letters; GCZ? I really like ‘guestchaz’ better than the others, plus I don’t like changes.
>
> (Yea, yea I know it’s not all about me:))
Well, I am somewhat cautiously open to some suggestions in a limited maybe I’ll consider them but not really sort of way.
This is the friendliest, most loving happy mob of heartless cut-throat brigands as I’ve ever met:D. There’s a reason I gave y’all a limited set of choices.
> [@RTFirefly](#):
>
> \*It’s a plane!
>
> No, it’s a bird!
>
> It’s **Kylo Wren!!** \*
This made me laugh
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### Author:  [@naita](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/naita)
#### Post date: [April 21, 2019, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/15 "2019-04-21T21:58:30Z")
On planet X everyone’s username is guestchaz
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### Author:  [@Kimstu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimstu)
#### Post date: [April 22, 2019, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/16 "2019-04-22T01:04:06Z")
How about borrowing the handy filionymic construction used in Arabic, “Abu X” meaning “the father of X”, so you can be “AbuScoot”?
Western names especially have lots of traditional patronymic options for expressing “the son of X” (Mac/Mc, -son/-sen, -ides, etc.), but we seem to lack conventional filionymic constructions for people who would like to be known as “the father of X”.
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### Author:  [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)
#### Post date: [April 22, 2019, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/17 "2019-04-22T01:08:08Z")
Posty McPosterface.
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### Author:  [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)
#### Post date: [April 22, 2019, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/18 "2019-04-22T01:13:35Z")
My suggestion: _ **chazbot** _, in honor of Mork From Ork.
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### Author:  [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)
#### Post date: [April 22, 2019, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/19 "2019-04-22T01:15:20Z")
Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain; take the last choice.
(Are the decisions of the SDMB masses legally binding?)
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### Author:  [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)
#### Post date: [April 22, 2019, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-pick-a-new-name/832858/20 "2019-04-22T01:36:41Z")
> [@Kimstu](#):
>
> How about borrowing the handy filionymic construction used in Arabic, “Abu X” meaning “the father of X”, so you can be “AbuScoot”?
>
> Western names especially have lots of traditional patronymic options for expressing “the son of X” (Mac/Mc, -son/-sen, -ides, etc.), but we seem to lack conventional filionymic constructions for people who would like to be known as “the father of X”.
Actually, I did briefly consider a “son of” type name. But Mac or McGary just is so not me and we already have a Garrison, so thats out.
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