# Help me plan Trump's Inauguration **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 23, 2016, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491 "2016-12-23T22:49:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/41 "2016-12-31T02:59:54Z")
> [@Steve\_MB](#): > > They could get a lineup of Republican Party bigwigs to do their “sit”, “roll over”, “beg”, etc routines in a literal performance-art sense. Wait, you mean like a Cheesy Howard Stern PPV, with butt sex between the regular callers and the shows whack pack? Would they line Congress up on all fours to get their “Bills”…? ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/42 "2016-12-31T03:25:18Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > Bite my ass, **aldi** … That was Republican humor, **Uke**. It is not necessarily an insult, often it is given by someone who wishes to partake in bantering wit, but is ill-equipped for sport. Tiny Tim cannot clog-dance, alas, and its awkward to watch him try. The Republican joke is similar to the “Dad joke” in its poverty of wit, but a “Dad joke” may occasionally register at 200-250 millihicks, and the Republican joke rarely exceeds 100/mh. A better person might just go ahead and laugh. But neither am I. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/43 "2016-12-31T21:54:07Z")
Ah, I’m just glad I didn’t get a reprimand from a Mod. I know you’re not supposed to say “Fuck you” to anyone specific in the Pit, but don’t know where ass-biting stands. It was a more vehement response that I normally would have had. But I’d just listened to the podcast Obama/Axelrod interview – polished, gently humorous, sober, intelligent, moving – and seeing someone say “I can’t wait until this Loser Bad President goes away so we can get TRUMP in” was more than I could take… ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/44 "2016-12-31T22:32:48Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > …oh, and Pussy Grabbers. They didn’t appear in the movie, but I can totally see Pussy Grabbers as part of the Blue Meanie force. I always thought she was a Bond quasi-villain… ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/45 "2016-12-31T23:45:37Z")
Maybe Cruz can curry favour with Trump again by reprising his “green and eggs and ham” speech. Eric could expand on his comparisons between Zuckerberg and him, maybe give a power point presentation on lion-hunting. I just hope no distinctly audible, wet-sounding prolapse occurs while DT’s talking - there’d be concern that his expression might change to that deer-in-the-headlights look he had after the first post-election briefing with Obama. ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2016, 11:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/46 "2016-12-31T23:55:45Z")
Require everyone who attends to wear bad toupées. And Guy Fawkes masks. ---
**Author:** ![Mince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Mince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mince)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2017, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/47 "2017-01-02T16:51:44Z")
[![](https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/x/gun-bullet-16010040.jpg) ](https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/x/gun-bullet-16010040.jpg) ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2017, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/48 "2017-01-02T17:56:08Z")
> [@Mince](#): > > [https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/x/gun-bullet-16010040.jpg](https://thumbs.dreamstime.com/x/gun-bullet-16010040.jpg) Not going to report it, but that seems out of line with both the tone of the thread and good taste. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2017, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/49 "2017-01-02T18:00:13Z")
It’s Trump Roulette, its a lot like Russian Roulette, but its played with an automatic rather than a revolver. ---
**Author:** ![Mince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Mince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mince)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2017, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/50 "2017-01-02T18:37:29Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Not going to report it, but that seems out of line with both the tone of the thread and good taste. The _single bullet_ suggests I’d rather kill myself than be involved in Trump’s inauguration, and it isn’t literal. ---
**Author:** ![Mince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Mince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mince)\ **Post date:** [January 2, 2017, 6:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/51 "2017-01-02T18:43:56Z")
And, not being literal, it certainly is in the spirit of the thread, where ridiculous inauguration ideas were requested and given. ---
**Author:** ![Calico\_Jack](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calico_jack/32/7320_2.png) [@Calico\_Jack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calico_Jack)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/52 "2017-01-03T02:20:39Z")
> [@D.E.S.K.Top668](#): > > Allegedly, Trump’s team is having trouble finding acts for his Inauguration. I figure we can come up with a suitable party plan. So, what would you like to see at Trump’s Inauguration? > > My picks; > > Jeff (fuhfuh) Dunham (DunHAAM) dressed as Putin with Peanut dressed as Trump and a special announcement that Jose Jalapeno-on-a-stick and Achmed the dead terrorist were not allowed into the country. > > Green Day performing “American Idiot.” > > Alec Baldwin has already offered to sing “Highway to Hell.” > > (While this thread is technically about entertainment, I feel that the opinions probably expressed will end it in the pit.) “Ding Dong the Witch is Dead” from Wizard of Oz ---
**Author:** ![Calico\_Jack](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calico_jack/32/7320_2.png) [@Calico\_Jack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calico_Jack)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 2:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/53 "2017-01-03T02:22:18Z")
> [@Mince](#): > > And, not being literal, it certainly is in the spirit of the thread, where ridiculous inauguration ideas were requested and given. The average IQ of this subform has got to be about the same as the average age here. Hopefully some more non-braindead progressives show up here until these kids get scared off and go look for another ‘safe space’ devoid of facts. ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/54 "2017-01-03T02:27:59Z")
Who are you, again? ---
**Author:** ![Calico\_Jack](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calico_jack/32/7320_2.png) [@Calico\_Jack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calico_Jack)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/55 "2017-01-03T02:42:36Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > Who are you, again? Yep predictable. Seems the playbook boils down to: 1. Call someone a troll over and over until they get banned, or 2. Accuse someone of being an alt until the get banned No creativity whatsoever, lol ---
**Author:** ![Ukulele\_Ike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/df788c/32.png) [@Ukulele\_Ike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ukulele_Ike)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 2:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/56 "2017-01-03T02:49:45Z")
No, I wasn’t trying to do either of those things. I’m just wondering who you are. You seem like a _very_ strange person. ---
**Author:** ![Calico\_Jack](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/calico_jack/32/7320_2.png) [@Calico\_Jack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calico_Jack)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/57 "2017-01-03T02:52:04Z")
> [@Ukulele\_Ike](#): > > No, I wasn’t trying to do either of those things. I’m just wondering who you are. You seem like a _very_ strange person. I guess if I was a transgendered feminist vegan Brony atheist Muslim communist with an anime pillow girlfriend I’d seem more normal to you guys? ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 2:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/58 "2017-01-03T02:58:17Z")
> [@Calico\_Jack](#): > > No creativity whatsoever, lol Not much creativity required for the relatively black and white issue of interacting with you. ---
**Author:** ![raventhief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raventhief/32/4_2.png) [@raventhief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/raventhief)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/59 "2017-01-03T03:05:30Z")
Jackie child, one thing you need to realize - your own actions will get you banned. It will not be someone else’s fault, when it inevitably happens, it will be _yours_. You cannot blame others for your own misdeeds. If you are consistently an ass – and you are – you will be bounced. And not a tear will be shed. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [January 3, 2017, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491/60 "2017-01-03T03:30:22Z")
> [@raventhief](#): > > Jackie child, one thing you need to realize - your own actions will get you banned. It will not be someone else’s fault, when it inevitably happens, it will be _yours_. You cannot blame others for your own misdeeds. If you are consistently an ass – and you are – you will be bounced. > > And not a tear will be shed. I’ll bring the party hats and noisemakers. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-plan-trumps-inauguration/775491.md?page=4)