# Help me please \[learn English\]. **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 9, 2011, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136 "2011-08-09T22:54:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2011, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/21 "2011-08-10T21:44:06Z")
Not the point, **Omar Little** , sure, there are other message boards more suitable for this, the point is that the **SDMB** should stand ashamed of itself for being so freakin’ rude to someone who reached out for help on an English speaking board and got dropped with the first post. Possibly the OP would like to exchange in friendly conversation, asking questions, and being politely corrected on spelling errors. Was that so hard **Dopers**? Maybe the OP needed to be more specific in his request, but from where I stand, it looks like someone could’ve merely asked them to be more specific, instead of being an a\*\* and posting a bunch of garbage that he/she couldn’t understand (hinting at someone in particular), but still got the point that we’re not going to help because are heads are shoved up our sh\*t-holes so far we can’t see **straight** to give the **Dope**! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![constanze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@constanze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/constanze)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 8:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/22 "2011-08-11T08:48:20Z")
> [@BubbaDog](#): > > How would a person who doesn’t know English understand your response and why wouldn’t they ask that question in their native language at a site that understands them? > > Also, If I wanted help in learning a language (example Cantonese) and I went to a Cantonese message board I would have to understand the language in order to navigate to the section of the board that is relative to my question. I would also state that my native language is (X) so that the responders would know what my starting point was. > > It doesn’t do any good to point a Spanish speaking person who wants to learn English to a website that helps German speaking people learn English. > > So it looks like **Dollyy** is either purposefully posing or has somehow asked for help in such a way that she cannot possibly benefit from the responses. You seem to misunderstand what “learning/ speaking” a foreign language means. It’s not a yes/no, you speak/don’t speak the language position; rather it’s a process, where you start with basic words and grammar and gradually process. There are also different skills: Hearing and understanding spoken language; reading and understanding written language; writing yourself without mistakes; speaking yourself without mistakes. (The last step, that many language learners never reach, is “being able to pass for a native” because it requires a lot of training to get rid of the wrong accent plus an enormous knowledge about the culture and the way people in that culture think.) So somebody, esp. who has studied with a book or in a big classroom before, can be fluent enough to navigate a website, or compose a post, but still make typical mistakes (the mentioned article problem, false friends etc.), need practice with native speakers or not understand hundreds of pop-culture references to Anglo-American culture on TV. ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/23 "2011-08-11T09:50:28Z")
> [@Bosstrain](#): > > Not the point, **Omar Little** , sure, there are other message boards more suitable for this, the point is that the **SDMB** should stand ashamed of itself for being so freakin’ rude to someone who reached out for help on an English speaking board and got dropped with the first post. Possibly the OP would like to exchange in friendly conversation, asking questions, and being politely corrected on spelling errors. Was that so hard **Dopers**? Maybe the OP needed to be more specific in his request, but from where I stand, it looks like someone could’ve merely asked them to be more specific, instead of being an a\*\* and posting a bunch of garbage that he/she couldn’t understand (hinting at someone in particular), but still got the point that we’re not going to help because are heads are shoved up our sh\*t-holes so far we can’t see **straight** to give the **Dope**! :mad: I wholeheartedly concur, Bosstrain. Hopefully the OP will check back and realize that not _ **all** _ of the Dopers, act like _ **dopes** _! :mad: Not that I’m pointing a finger at anyone in particular. \ Isn’t it a rule of some sort that snarkasm is only \ “acceptable”, _ **after** _ the OP’s question has been answered in a factual manner? ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 10:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/24 "2011-08-11T10:01:03Z")
Welcome! > [@](#): > > I am new member of this community..please help me out to learn an English fast..It ll be big favor for me..thanks.. I am a new member of this community. Please help me to learn English quickly. It’ll be a big favour for me. Thanks. There is your first lesson for free! But seriously, the best way to learn is to post and reply. Tell us something about you! ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 10:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/25 "2011-08-11T10:41:56Z")
> [@sandra\_nz](#): > > Welcome! > > I am a new member of this community. Please help me to learn English quickly. It’ll be a big favour for me. Thanks. > > There is your first lesson for free! But seriously, the best way to learn is to post and reply. Tell us something about you! slight :nitpick: Shouldn’t that read: “It’ll be a big _ **favor, to** _ me.” Other than that, an excellent reply! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![sandra\_nz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eada6e/32.png) [@sandra\_nz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sandra_nz)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/26 "2011-08-11T11:35:27Z")
I missed the bit where the OP said American English? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/27 "2011-08-11T13:13:40Z")
> [@sandra\_nz](#): > > I missed the bit where the OP said American English? 😛 Touche’! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/28 "2011-08-11T13:49:42Z")
Just so you all know, I sent a PM to the OP and informed that some of us were ready to help. Did no one think of checking **Dollyy** ’s profile? He/she is in the US, and the interest stated is reading…reading! You bastards, what better way to learn how to read English than to join an English forum!! :mad: ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 2:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/29 "2011-08-11T14:04:54Z")
> [@Smeghead](#): > > Welcome! We are anispeptic, frasmotic, and even compunctuous to have you onboard with our pericombobulations! **Smeghead** , you $_&_#. I hope you didn’t drive this person away. ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/30 "2011-08-11T14:28:00Z")
> [@Bosstrain](#): > > Just so you all know, I sent a PM to the OP and informed that some of us were ready to help. Did no one think of checking **Dollyy** ’s profile? He/she is in the US, and the interest stated is reading…reading! You bastards, what better way to learn how to read English than to join an English forum!! :mad: +1. Kudos to you, good sir! 🆒 (I, for one, feel a little sheepish for not thinking of doing, what you _ **did** _ think of.) :smack: ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/31 "2011-08-11T14:33:50Z")
> [@davidm](#): > > **Smeghead** , you $_&_#. Seconded! I did a search on the words in his post. Not one of them, was even a real word. :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Bosstrain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Bosstrain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosstrain)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 3:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/32 "2011-08-11T15:03:54Z")
I found what gave **Smeghead** this [nonsense](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/archive/index.php/t-271867.html), some Blackadder bull, he’s posted on this and I guess thought it would be funny to bring it back for another round :rolleyes:. I highly doubt we’ll hear from **Dollyy** again. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 4:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/33 "2011-08-11T16:47:47Z")
> [@sandra\_nz](#): > > But seriously, the best way to learn is to post and reply. Tell us something about you! Exactly. Find a topic of real personal interest, and engage. If some particular bit of language proves to be particularly difficult, you can always start a new thread about it. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [August 11, 2011, 6:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/34 "2011-08-11T18:08:11Z")
Since the OP is looking for advice, this is better suited to IMHO than GQ. Thread title edited to indicate subject. Colibri General Questions Moderator ---
**Author:** ![spingears](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ebca7d/32.png) [@spingears](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/spingears)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2011, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/35 "2011-08-12T13:35:20Z")
> [@dollyy](#): > > I am new member of this community..please help me out to learn an English fast..It ll be big favor for me..thanks.. Immerse yourself in it, that is try to learn from every person you meet by talking with them. Better, is to join in with others as a group. Children learn other languages by using it to talk with those of other languages as needed to convey meaning to theor actovities. Now “Pull the other one, it has bells on it”. Me thinkist we have been ‘had’. ---
**Author:** ![JBDivmstr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/b4bc9f/32.png) [@JBDivmstr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JBDivmstr)\ **Post date:** [August 12, 2011, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/36 "2011-08-12T15:21:50Z")
> [@spingears](#): > > … Me thinkist we have been ‘had’. Three days and 35 posts later, and still no sign of the OP, _ **anywhere** _ on the boards. It’s sure starting to look that way. :smack: Think I’ll give it one more day, and then it’s “Off to the Pit, with 'em!” :mad: ---
**Author:** ![BubbaDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bubbadog/32/333_2.png) [@BubbaDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BubbaDog)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/37 "2011-08-19T16:33:06Z")
> [@JBDivmstr](#): > > Three days and 35 posts later, and still no sign of the OP, _ **anywhere** _ on the boards. It’s sure starting to look that way. :smack: > Think I’ll give it one more day, and then it’s “Off to the Pit, with 'em!” :mad: It started to look that way on the first post. Then some self riotous people came in and started insulting people and junior modding the thread. Just look at the sequence of events. The op posted a very short post lacking enough info to really give Dopers a chance to help. **Smeghead** posted a goofy response but I don’t see how one reply would realistically scare off the OP. It wasn’t insulting. To a non-english speaking person it would probably just look like some syntax that he/she couldn’t resolve with internet translation algorithms. Then a few pleasant responses. Six hours after the op **Dr. Drake** posted his doubts (and apologized for being cynical). It wasn’t until the next morning that **Omar Little** posted a sarcastic post. By then it was obvious to him (and a lot of us) that **dollyy** was either a drive by troll or somebody who wasn’t really planning to join this community. ---
**Author:** ![Omar\_Little](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omar_little/32/269_2.png) [@Omar\_Little](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omar_Little)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/38 "2011-08-19T18:19:35Z")
But BubbaDog you make the faux outrage seem so passe’. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2011, 2:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/39 "2011-08-20T02:33:29Z")
Type Alt-130 for the é. Not _that’s_ educatin’! ---
**Author:** ![Rand\_Rover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/db5fbb/32.png) [@Rand\_Rover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rand_Rover)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2011, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136/40 "2011-08-20T03:06:25Z")
> [@Bryan\_Ekers](#): > > Not _that’s_ educatin’! Would you like help to learn an English? 🙂 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-please-learn-english/592136.md?page=3)