# Help me ship a lasagna to Afghanistan **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [August 27, 2011, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299 "2011-08-27T17:24:43Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![even\_sven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dfb087/32.png) [@even\_sven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/even_sven)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/21 "2011-08-28T02:27:04Z")
My mother used to send me the makings for lasagna when I was a Peace Corps volunteer. She would send noodles, sauce, shelf-stable cheese and canned meat. It wasn’t exactly home cooking, but it hit the spot. If you want something more personal, maybe you could try one of those dry soup mixes people pit in jars and give as presents. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/22 "2011-08-28T03:40:37Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > Pork and pork by-products [are not permitted be sent](http://hqdainet.army.mil/mpsa/faq.htm#q5) to service members in Afghanistan. That would include italian sausage, if your recipe is that type.Hmmm; lasagna, cookies, brownies, candy; one of these is not like the others. You seem very invested in this not happening, **FearIstself** , any special reason that should be? ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 3:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/23 "2011-08-28T03:53:09Z")
> [@Lucretia](#): > > You seem very invested in this not happening, **FearIstself** , any special reason that should be? No special reason. Sending a lasagna to Afghanistan is just a dumb idea. Sorry to be so blunt, but half the people here are thinking it, but just too tactful to say it out loud. Send cookies and brownies, like all the other moms; somehow, their kids don’t starve. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 4:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/24 "2011-08-28T04:59:45Z")
> [@Fear\_Itself](#): > > No special reason. Sending a lasagna to Afghanistan is just a dumb idea. Sorry to be so blunt, but half the people here are thinking it, but just too tactful to say it out loud. > > Send cookies and brownies, like all the other moms; somehow, their kids don’t starve. Ah, of course. Dumb idea. Well, if you think so, then I suppose you wouldn’t have any practical suggestions to add, then? Go away. Your input is neither welcome nor valued. ---
**Author:** ![Ibanez](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a4c791/32.png) [@Ibanez](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ibanez)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/25 "2011-08-28T05:14:03Z")
You could send a lasagna-esque type dish by using a dehydrator for the ground beef. Make sure you drain the fat completely from the beef or it will spoil even if it’s dehydrated. Assemble for the meal to ship, add pasta, can the sauce the only thing I’m stuck on is the cheese although it may be part of his rations over there. ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/26 "2011-08-28T06:11:54Z")
as an alternative, have you considered homemade bread? when Mrs. Guest was in Iraq I would send her 10-12 mini-loaves a month. She loved it, her freinds and the folks in her platoon loved it, it ships well, you can pack and ship in a medium or large flat rate box (ziplock freezer bags work just fine) ---
**Author:** ![DorkVader](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/73ab20/32.png) [@DorkVader](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DorkVader)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/27 "2011-08-28T06:23:14Z")
Ack! sorry, accidentally posted as I got up to take care of Little Guest who woke up for some reason. I realize that my suggestion isn’t really what you were asking for, I just offered it as an alternative because, well, I can’t think of any really good way(the canning jars sounds ok, but I’d worry about breakage even with packing) to ship lasagna that would be any more appealing than an mre except that it comes from “Mom’s Kitchen and Eatery” ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/28 "2011-08-28T06:33:38Z")
Could you fry the lasagna? I mean cut it in to, say, half-serving sized pieces and fry it so as to make it more ship-able? Alton Brown does a fried “[Next Day Mac and Cheese Toast](http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/alton-brown/next-day-mac-and-cheese-toast-recipe/index.html)” which is just taking a macaroni & cheese casserole, chopping it up and frying it…perhaps you could do the same with lasagna? ---
**Author:** ![Alessan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alessan/32/465_2.png) [@Alessan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alessan)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 9:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/29 "2011-08-28T09:14:09Z")
Send him biscotti. They’re sufficiently Italian, and virtually indestructable. ---
**Author:** ![Lynn\_Bodoni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e47c2d/32.png) [@Lynn\_Bodoni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lynn_Bodoni)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 9:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/30 "2011-08-28T09:27:00Z")
> [@Lucretia](#): > > Ah, of course. Dumb idea. Well, if you think so, then I suppose you wouldn’t have any practical suggestions to add, then? Go away. Your input is neither welcome nor valued. If an idea is unworkable (and I think this idea is), then that might not be the answer you wanted, but it’s valuable information. It will save you considerable time and money in the long run if you know that a lasagna, even if it passes customs, won’t be edible when it gets to your son. ---
**Author:** ![AK84](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@AK84](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AK84)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 11:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/31 "2011-08-28T11:17:26Z")
> [@Lucretia](#): > > So, the boy is in Afghanistan. I talked with him on Skype today, and the Italian mother in me is in full overdrive. He’s lost weight, he’s too thin! My first instinct, of course, is that he needs me to make him a lasagna. This is complicated by the fact that he is in Afghanistan. Then I thought…there are some really smart engineery-types here on the Dope…perhaps someone here has some clever ideas on how one could ship a lasagna overseas, and have it arrive intact and edible. Anyone? This is a different time and a different country’s army but for what its worth. When my father was in Somalia, my mother would send him food sometimes. What she did was that we lived near an airbase and he was based near an airbase and one particular flight would leave and arrive at regular times; my mother would simply give the package to one of the crew who would give it to my father. Of course this was 1993; he was an officer, security was a lot less tight and it could be done when he was near the airfield which was not often. But then IIRC you are a USAF nurse; call in a few favours. Otherwise well; I don’t think it can be sent. ---
**Author:** ![KinkiNipponTourist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e9bcb4/32.png) [@KinkiNipponTourist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KinkiNipponTourist)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/32 "2011-08-28T11:55:53Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > If an idea is unworkable (and I think this idea is), then that might not be the answer you wanted, but it’s valuable information. It will save you considerable time and money in the long run if you know that a lasagna, even if it passes customs, won’t be edible when it gets to your son. I can only speak for myself, but it seems to me the reason **Lucretia** is asking here is precisely because there isn’t an easy answer. At first glance, the idea does seem unworkable–that’s the premise we’re going on until we figure something out. I don’t think **Fear Itself** ’s information–or his/her repeated jabs–is going to be a huge delusion-shattering gem of truth for **Lucretia**. Having said that, have you heard of [retort packaging?](http://www.officialvacupack.com/product_info.php?products_id=243?osCsid=a6ad6d1c192ddc6ceff38f699d7c68c0) It’s huge here in Asia, less so it seems in the US, according to the [wiki article](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Retort_pouch). Obviously I don’t endorse the company linked here; I just wanted to find out if there was a way to use the technology at home. Anyway, just an idea. ---
**Author:** ![Mikkel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikkel/32/13151_2.png) [@Mikkel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mikkel)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/33 "2011-08-28T17:27:13Z")
Baking the lasagna in a wide mouthed canning jar should work, I think. Close the jar immediately after it comes out of the oven. It will be sterile inside and the airtight closure will keep it that way for some time. You could try it out. Make a lasagna in a canning jar, leave it out in the kitchen and try tasting it after a week or two. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/34 "2011-08-28T17:39:45Z")
> [@\*\*KinkiNipponTourist\*\*](#): > > I can only speak for myself, but it seems to me the reason **Lucretia** is asking here is precisely because there isn’t an easy answer. At first glance, the idea does seem unworkable–that’s the premise we’re going on until we figure something out. I don’t think **Fear Itself** ’s information–or his/her repeated jabs–is going to be a huge delusion-shattering gem of truth for **Lucretia**. > > Having said that, have you heard of [retort packaging?](http://www.officialvacupack.com/product_info.php?products_id=243?osCsid=a6ad6d1c192ddc6ceff38f699d7c68c0) It’s huge here in Asia, less so it seems in the US, according to the [wiki article](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Retort_pouch). > > Obviously I don’t endorse the company linked here; I just wanted to find out if there was a way to use the technology at home. Anyway, just an idea. Well, precisely, **KinkiNipponTourist**. I am quite aware that I can’t just throw a lasagna in an envelope and expect it to get there, and I even know that perhaps it can’t be done. However, maybe it can be, and maybe someone here can help me figure out a way to do it that I wouldn’t have been able to think of on my own. For instance, that ‘retort’ packaging idea looks quite promising…it seems to be the same thing they do to MREs, which actually have things like spaghetti and lasagna in them (not, of course, anywhere as good as mine). I will definitely look into that, as well as experiment with a lot of the canning ideas I’m getting here. ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/35 "2011-08-28T17:58:34Z")
> [@Lucretia](#): > > Well, precisely, **KinkiNipponTourist**. I am quite aware that I can’t just throw a lasagna in an envelope and expect it to get there, and I even know that perhaps it can’t be done. However, maybe it can be, and maybe someone here can help me figure out a way to do it that I wouldn’t have been able to think of on my own. For instance, that ‘retort’ packaging idea looks quite promising…it seems to be the same thing they do to MREs, which actually have things like spaghetti and lasagna in them (not, of course, anywhere as good as mine). I will definitely look into that, as well as experiment with a lot of the canning ideas I’m getting here. Vacuum sealing on its own does nothing to prevent the growth of botulism. I don’t want to put too fine a point on it, but the type of manufacture you’re talking about requires industrial equipment and expertise. Any time you can meat or cheese, you’re taking a huge risk of botulism with the slightest error. Botulism can kill, is anaerobic (grows only in airfree environments) and has no detectable taste or smell. It’s a really stupid risk if you’re not talking about literal life and death survivalism. ---
**Author:** ![Ruken](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/f475e1/32.png) [@Ruken](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruken)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/36 "2011-08-28T18:07:25Z")
> [@Mikkel](#): > > Baking the lasagna in a wide mouthed canning jar should work, I think. Close the jar immediately after it comes out of the oven. It will be sterile inside and the airtight closure will keep it that way for some time. > > You could try it out. Make a lasagna in a canning jar, leave it out in the kitchen and try tasting it after a week or two. It’s not the taste we should be worried about, but the risk of death from just a taste. ---
**Author:** ![Lucretia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/13edae/32.png) [@Lucretia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucretia)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/37 "2011-08-28T18:21:10Z")
> [@Hello\_Again](#): > > Vacuum sealing on its own does nothing to prevent the growth of botulism. > > I don’t want to put too fine a point on it, but the type of manufacture you’re talking about requires industrial equipment and expertise. Any time you can meat or cheese, you’re taking a huge risk of botulism with the slightest error. Botulism can kill, is anaerobic (grows only in airfree environments) and has no detectable taste or smell. > > It’s a really stupid risk if you’re not talking about literal life and death survivalism. You make a good point. All the really viable suggestions involve canning. You are correct, once the food is vacumn packed, it needs to be processed like conventional canning. However, I know that people _do_ can meat successfully at home. I have a family member who essentially provides all of his family’s meat via hunting deer, and they can part of that. However, they aren’t trying to ship it anywhere, either. ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/38 "2011-08-28T18:46:39Z")
> [@Lucretia](#): > > You make a good point. All the really viable suggestions involve canning. You are correct, once the food is vacumn packed, it needs to be processed like conventional canning. However, I know that people _do_ can meat successfully at home. I have a family member who essentially provides all of his family’s meat via hunting deer, and they can part of that. However, they aren’t trying to ship it anywhere, either. If they are water-bath canning meat they are stupid beyond all measure. I assume they are using a pressure canner, which will start you at $200-$500. [How to use a pressure canner](http://www.uga.edu/nchfp/publications/uga/using_press_canners.html). You’ll note it is a complicated process fraught with hazards. If you search the internet, like I did, and cannot find even one pressure canning enthusiast explaining how to can lasagna, you might consider that a sign from the hive mind that it’s a bad idea. For one, it seems that the pressure required to make the meat safe to eat will pulp the pasta. Even if you choose a vegetarian lasagna, it is generally advised in [large capital letters](http://www.uga.edu/nchfp/publications/uga/uga_can_veg.pdf) (scroll down to the last entry, “Vegetable soup”) not to mix vegetables with any flour or pasta or rice in pressure canning as it apparently inhibits uniform sterilization. ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/39 "2011-08-28T18:57:36Z")
> [@Lynn\_Bodoni](#): > > If an idea is unworkable (and I think this idea is), then that might not be the answer you wanted, but it’s valuable information. It will save you considerable time and money in the long run if you know that a lasagna, even if it passes customs, won’t be edible when it gets to your son. Then he need only to have said, “I don’t think this idea will work.” Any more than that is frankly rude. ---
**Author:** ![Fear\_Itself](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/fear_itself/32/19637_2.png) [@Fear\_Itself](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fear_Itself)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2011, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/help-me-ship-a-lasagna-to-afghanistan/594299/40 "2011-08-28T19:24:44Z")
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